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  • EADD Moderators: Shambles

The Up-the-Rear End Thread UNCUT! - Approach with caution

Haha, nicely slipped in there.

Arse stories? Mother currently has some sort of bowel problem. Like it's mildly prolapsed or something or there's a kink in her colon causing constant constipation hence prolapsing or I dunno she's shit at explaining and anyway she's having surgery I guess. People never tell me these things til I notice something is wrong and ask. She had me looking up options for private surgery and asking me why I was turning images off in Chrome. So yeah vaguely worried about that because tho she's only 50, she's not in great health and none of her side are particularly healthy (uncle having heart attack at the age of 34 last year, although he does have four kids). Dunno what they'll do. She has the same problem with her womb/cervix too but this is the arse thread. It's pissing me off cos the NHS doctors have essentially told her to stay in bed/on the sofa and she has the whole house to look after, plus my idiot sister's horses because she's a selfish dick, and when Dad came over here to do renovations he had her lifting him heavy shit (har) til I shouted at him for making her do it when I'd offered endlessly, and just got yelled at by him for being on my high horse.

So yeah. Arse problems. She's made me scared to go for a shit or have sex now. The NHS say they don't usually operate til women are at least 60 but she's in agony, hence checking out going private :\ it kills me cos I know whatever she tells me there's always something worse and she doesn't wanna worry me. There's no reason not to operate imo; womb-wise she's going through the menopause and Dad had the snip years ago, and bowel-wise, I wouldn't wanna be fucking with my bowels.

Sorry that was a bit deep. Light-hearted arse story: I once nearly got bummed by a traffic cone because I was playing in goal at primary school and made a bad dive. Saved the ball, did not save my coccyx and was but a few mm from my arsehole. Still hurts when I stand up after sitting down for a while, nearly twenty years later.
 
Haha, nicely slipped in there.

I never did. Although slipping into a sewn up anus is somewhat tempting on pure perviness grounds admittedly.

Arse problems. She's made me scared to go for a shit or have sex now.

That's not what they taught me at lesbian school. Are you sure you're doing it right? :sus:

I once nearly got bummed by a traffic cone because I was playing in goal at primary school and made a bad dive. Saved the ball, did not save my coccyx and was but a few mm from my arsehole. Still hurts when I stand up after sitting down for a while, nearly twenty years later.

I chipped my coccyx in a PE lesson at primary school. Jumped the vaulting horse and the crash mats (ie tiny thin plasticated mattress) shot out from under me and I landed right on it. It hurt. A lot. And still causes problems with back I suspect.
 
Fracturing the cocyx is one of those injuries that makes me shudder, and I'm not squeamish in the slightest (well, unsqueamish enough to re-locate my own shoulder every time I've dislocated except once).
 
lol@ Thread. If only Knock was here to see it. I'm sure he'd have a lot to say...

Total Posts: 44 .
Who Posted?

Posts: 8 .
Shambles

Posts: 7 .
omen_owen mk2

Posts: 6 .
Eveleivibe

Posts: 5 .
roganjosh

Posts: 3 .
Sammy G

Posts: 2 .
HouseFever

Posts: 2 .
curious_24

Posts: 2 .
snolly



Sounds about right...
 
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I can't believe RoganJosh posted the words

Anal fissure. That is all.

In a thread that wasn't this one. I lived with one for 6 months after my prostate op. Going for a shit every morning knowing you are going to leap off the loo and scream and cry in agony for 40 minutes until the codeine kicked in. And I mean scream and cry.

Great fun.
 
I can't believe RoganJosh posted the words



In a thread that wasn't this one. I lived with one for 6 months after my prostate op. Going for a shit every morning knowing you are going to leap off the loo and scream and cry in agony for 40 minutes until the codeine kicked in. And I mean scream and cry.

Great fun.

6 months! Man that's awful. Mine is a result of being on iron tablets for anemia which fuck up your guts at the best of times. My body seems to be acclimatising to them though so hopefully the less watery black shits I do, the more chance it will have to heal. I've been using the disabled toilets at work and have had a couple of moments this week's where I've ended up curled up on the floor in that much pain from it though (more room to do that in the disabled loo). I've never shit shards of glass before, but I feel like I'm prepared for the sensation if I ever do now :(
 
Curled up, shards of glass. Yep. There's a man who knows what I'm talking about. Hope things improve for you big time soon RJ.
 
Cheers dude. In the grand scheme of things, they are! The steroids I'm on now mean that I don't have much inflammation pain. Whether it stays that way is another matter I guess, but for now I'm doing ok.
 
I feel for you RoganJ, I can't imagine the dread you must feel whenever you need to crap.
For most people it's a relief to go to the toilet but for you it's an ordeal in pain just to execute an everyday bodily function.
 
Click on the number of posts in a thread on the EADD page, opens new window showing who posted.

Its a tactic heavily used by the police to see who has an interest in what on BL. ;)
Hey, neat! Apparently I'm the second most prolific poster in the dicksizing thread. =D
 
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