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JaNEWary -- January getting/staying sober thread

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Hang in there MS!!! I am hanging tight too we can do this ;)
 
^^ Very true indeed delta. all of my kicks have been more emotional than the last. Probably because every time I've relapsed I've caused worse and worse wreckage in my life. This last time the despair and demoralization I felt was almost as bad, if not worse than the physical discomfort I had.

Try to stay positive and keep reminding yourself that it will pass. It's not forever. You can do it delta!
 
Mr.Scagnattie said:
^^

47 days and still feeling it a bit, huh? Yeah, kicking bupe is rough. The withdrawal symptoms hang around a long while. I imagine in another 2 or 3 months, you'll be feeling back to your old self. Hows your sleep cycle? Bad insomnia?
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Insomnia or hypersomnia. Eating a lot and am not enjoying much stuff like I used to.

But overall I am glad to have made it this far and have a lot accomplished.
 
What type of opioids have you been on and for how long?
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heroin oxycodone and dilaudid mostly for the last 5 years..... It goes in cycles... sometimes i use once a week for awhile then i start using more and more until i'm shooting a half gram a day till i break and try to detox and manage to get back to once a week. repeat
 
^^ I went through cycles like that for a while too, actually spent the better part of 2012 and beginning of 2013 in a perpetual state of withdrawal because for a while I was so down and out I could only ever get well for a couple hours in the morning, but was still too weak to keep hustling - so I would let myself go sick, stay sick all night then go hustle in the morning, get well for a couple hours, repeat. Spent 3/4 of everyday sick for months on end... It was horrible. Though at least once a week I would have a good day and get a decent amount of dope, ensuring that my tolerance stayed at a point where I would stay sick every other day I could hardly get any... looking back i don't know how i didn't blow my brains out.


Shit and I was actually kinda craving earlier, now that I'm thinking about all this the last thing in my mind is relapse.
 
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caseface99 said:
awesome stardust!!!

259 Days today. :)
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Thanks and congrats to you!!! <3

Mr.Scagnattie said:
Checking in..

Still off the dope. Though with all the stress in my life right now, i'm not going to lie, it is difficult. Trying to stay tough though.
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Glad to hear you're still doing well <3.

deltakappamu said:
Thank you for that. And it's funny because when I've kicked in the past I don't remember being so emotional. But then again, this has got to be the worst kick I have done. It's true what they say, the more times it just gets worse
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Thanks for the kind words <3. I'm glad to see you here posting, keep it up! :)

RogueGypsy said:
60 days sober thanks to Ibogaine!
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I'm happy to hear it is working for you <3. 60 days is phenomenal!!!

Today is Day 171 for me.

Keep it up guys!
 
Still got my head above water. Happy that I've made to the end of the month without slipping. Many hours of the day still seem to be consumed by bad thoughts. The longer I go, the less bad thoughts enter my head though.

Good luck all!
 
I'm going to a needle exchange later this afternoon to see if I can volunteer. Harm Reduction is something I really believe in, and I've been wanting to do something like this ever since I first got sober. I wouldn't be here, disease free and alive, if it wasn't for needle exchanges. I decided it was probably best to wait until I have some time before making any commitments to something like this, and now that I have 8.5 months I think I'm ready. So wish me luck, I hope they need people. :)
 
caseface99 said:
I'm going to a needle exchange later this afternoon to see if I can volunteer. Harm Reduction is something I really believe in, and I've been wanting to do something like this ever since I first got sober. I wouldn't be here, disease free and alive, if it wasn't for needle exchanges. I decided it was probably best to wait until I have some time before making any commitments to something like this, and now that I have 8.5 months I think I'm ready. So wish me luck, I hope they need people. :)
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Dude, I swear I am not just trying to be all up on your jock, but everything you say is on point and something that I would say/have said/have thought.
You are the shit
 
Haha Thanks Delta. Believe it or not, I get depressed sometimes too (a lot), and comments like that always bring me back up. =D

Don't forget that YOU are the shit, too. ;)



Edit- Just got back from dropping off a volunteer application at a needle exchange. Seems like a really grass roots type operation, basically bring all the supplies and set up on a street corner. I can not express how passionate I am about harm reduction and improving the quality of life for addicts still suffering. Everyone there was really stoked to see a young guy come up looking to volunteer, and they seemed even more interested when I told them I had used heroin for about 5 years, and currently have almost 9 months clean. Gave them the application and talked for a minute, they said there is a meeting coming up pretty soon for everyone involved, and that I should receive an Email within a few days from the volunteer coordinator. I'm really excited, I hope I get the opportunity to do this. =D

And if it doesn't work out for whatever reason, there was another outreach truck there too from the local free clinic and I got some volunteer information pamphlets from them as well, so I'll try with them if the exchange idea doesn't work.

I haven't even actually done anything yet, and I already feel better about myself for getting the ball rolling haha. This is something I've wanted to do since I got clean. I really want to give back and help make life just a little bit better for those who have it shitty right now.
 
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w01fg4ng said:
Still got my head above water. Happy that I've made to the end of the month without slipping. Many hours of the day still seem to be consumed by bad thoughts. The longer I go, the less bad thoughts enter my head though.

Good luck all!
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It's ok to have those thoughts.. A sponsor of mine used to tell me that we aren't responsible for our first thought, but we are responsible for how we react to it. Keep up the good work!

caseface99 said:
Haha Thanks Delta. Believe it or not, I get depressed sometimes too (a lot), and comments like that always bring me back up. =D

Don't forget that YOU are the shit, too. ;)
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Good, I am glad that I can help lift your spirits a bit.

I think the volunteering deal sounds like a great idea! They say that if you want self esteem, then you need to do "esteem-able" things, and that is no doubt in that category.

I used to volunteer as an English teacher at one of my cities ESL (English as a second language) program. I really enjoyed it and found it rewarding. Volunteering is tight, because you help others and essentially help yourself by making you feel good about doing so.
 
24 more everyone=D

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Hi there NeverSickAnymore!!! :) My very first friend here on blue light when I was having psychotic, crazy girlfriend episodes! I hope you are doing well, kind sir!

You are always so positive and welcoming, and took so much time to make me feel welcome.

Just wanted to say HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3 <3 <3 <3
 
That made my night<3 :):D=D

How R you:D.. I saw you slip back on and it made me glad then.. I was just looking for the post,,,thought it was on this thread.. I was like holy fuck dkm so very nice to see you.. but it really is.. SO how are yo<3u?
 
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