Intenselife
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2013
- Messages
- 382
I will try to keep this concise and at the point since i'm feeling a bit too social right now. Ok i'm almost 22, the only time i would say i ever had a phase where i drank occassionally was towards the beginning of when i first started experimenting newly with drugs of course with alcohol being one of the first ones. Being 5'5 and 135, i would drink about 6 beers (in 30 mins) about every weekend for roughly 6 months. When i started to sip the beers it got me actually more tipsy than chugging them. Needless to say, sometimes it would be shots (6-7 at the time) or a bottle of beringer red wine etc. I naturally had a higher tolerance for someone who didn't drink often, and sometimes could outdrink people who drank more than me without feeling trashed, instead more upbeat and social (when with people).
Anyways even though in our society alcohol is not considered so horrible but as times goes on research has proven and given many examples how harmful and nasty binge drinking, drinking heavily, or being an alcoholic is. Worse than heroin, cocaine, and one of the worst drugs to have a full blown addiction to (unlike i thought). During that 6 month period before i moved onto recreationally trying other drugs and having a less interest in drinking because a few minor side effects were becoming more apparent, but at the time i didn't realize that alcohol was triggering them but i do now when i look back at it. Every weekend (or weekday usually no more than drinking 3 times a week max) i would be atleast hungover atleast one of those times every week for those 6 months. And those hangovers involving non-stop throwing up, severe headache etc (you know the hangover symptoms) and towards the end i would get more and more emotional as i drank, because my true feelings would start coming out and i had a quiet a few crying outbursts (even though i never fully blacked on alcohol by itself which still stands till today). If something was bothering me i could feel a tingle in my heart/chest and could feel tears forming even when i was sober. (I was real depressed so of course that added to it).
Fast forward a few years later with a bunch of shit that happened between from them then to now, but way to much and a little off topic to mention all that. I got a job that is right across from a bar 3 months ago, and i usually go to the bar 2 times a week and sometimes i'll go 3 times, pretty consistently now for a few months once in a rare while i won't go during the week but that happened like once or twice. So either way when i go to the bar it varies on what i get, (i woudn't be spending so much at a bar if my parents werent so religious and extremely strict since childhood) quiet a few times i have upto 8 shots one after another (especially since everyone at the bar knows me, and i know them). And i will be just tipsy but not completely numb and tingling everywhere like i want to be but obviously still conscious and NOT hungover.
So for the past few months i usually average on 12-24 drinks a week, which isn't extremely high nor daily but i also was prescribed 1mg klonopin twice a day (2mg total) 4 months ago. Mind you not i am aware of the "dangers" because i almost overdosed on the first time i took xanax (4mg and a beer fell asleep for 24 hours don't remember it). But the klonopin since i am tolerant to it and don't abuse it DOES NOT make the alcohol's effect any stronger for me, in fact it makes me more calm when i drink opposed to as being wild if i don't take it and drink it. I guess what you could say i'm like a binge drinker, which many people are especially in our country but don't look as it as being dangerous or having any side effects.
But finally to the main point yesterday i had 4 beers (4 beers gets me more buzzed/tipsy than 8 shots of vodka straight) and then i also had two double shots of absolute vodka (4 shots, 4 beers = 8 drinks). Now their has been times in the past during long phase i'd drink once a month or so and not really have a huge craving for it (due to other drugs) those 8 shots would be enough to get me pretty hungover and feeling like i'm gonna die the next day omg so painful, but that doesn't happen at all anymore which shocks me but i have a feeling being prescribed the klonopin is probably whats preventing a lot of negative side effects as the beginning stages of binge drinking.
This morning maybe the second or third time i noticed this happen but i noticed it more this time than before. I felt like my muscles were slightly achy? like my bones in my arms felt a little sore, and i noticed they had this weird shaking feeling to them. It was like if i didn't try real hard they would be slightly shaking not like jerks or violent movements but slight shakiness. I have heard and been fascinated by "the shakes" associated with heavy/chronic/daily alcohol use, and how many people drink to just get rid of the shakes and the even worse symptoms that start if they are addicted to alcohol. But why would i even have any feeling to slightly shake, slight sore muscles, and headache BUT THAT ALL WENT AWAY WHEN I TOOK MY MORNING 1MG DOSE OF KLONOPIN. I don't even get heartburn like i used to from drinking a long time ago when i wasn't on klonopin (or any meds). So if you had the interest to read my long ass shit, do you think continuing to drink 2 times a week ranging around 10-16 drinks a week will present any side effects if i keep at that amount? I feel like the klonopin is hiding certain sypmtoms that can or have started developing but idk if it can!
Anyways even though in our society alcohol is not considered so horrible but as times goes on research has proven and given many examples how harmful and nasty binge drinking, drinking heavily, or being an alcoholic is. Worse than heroin, cocaine, and one of the worst drugs to have a full blown addiction to (unlike i thought). During that 6 month period before i moved onto recreationally trying other drugs and having a less interest in drinking because a few minor side effects were becoming more apparent, but at the time i didn't realize that alcohol was triggering them but i do now when i look back at it. Every weekend (or weekday usually no more than drinking 3 times a week max) i would be atleast hungover atleast one of those times every week for those 6 months. And those hangovers involving non-stop throwing up, severe headache etc (you know the hangover symptoms) and towards the end i would get more and more emotional as i drank, because my true feelings would start coming out and i had a quiet a few crying outbursts (even though i never fully blacked on alcohol by itself which still stands till today). If something was bothering me i could feel a tingle in my heart/chest and could feel tears forming even when i was sober. (I was real depressed so of course that added to it).
Fast forward a few years later with a bunch of shit that happened between from them then to now, but way to much and a little off topic to mention all that. I got a job that is right across from a bar 3 months ago, and i usually go to the bar 2 times a week and sometimes i'll go 3 times, pretty consistently now for a few months once in a rare while i won't go during the week but that happened like once or twice. So either way when i go to the bar it varies on what i get, (i woudn't be spending so much at a bar if my parents werent so religious and extremely strict since childhood) quiet a few times i have upto 8 shots one after another (especially since everyone at the bar knows me, and i know them). And i will be just tipsy but not completely numb and tingling everywhere like i want to be but obviously still conscious and NOT hungover.
So for the past few months i usually average on 12-24 drinks a week, which isn't extremely high nor daily but i also was prescribed 1mg klonopin twice a day (2mg total) 4 months ago. Mind you not i am aware of the "dangers" because i almost overdosed on the first time i took xanax (4mg and a beer fell asleep for 24 hours don't remember it). But the klonopin since i am tolerant to it and don't abuse it DOES NOT make the alcohol's effect any stronger for me, in fact it makes me more calm when i drink opposed to as being wild if i don't take it and drink it. I guess what you could say i'm like a binge drinker, which many people are especially in our country but don't look as it as being dangerous or having any side effects.
But finally to the main point yesterday i had 4 beers (4 beers gets me more buzzed/tipsy than 8 shots of vodka straight) and then i also had two double shots of absolute vodka (4 shots, 4 beers = 8 drinks). Now their has been times in the past during long phase i'd drink once a month or so and not really have a huge craving for it (due to other drugs) those 8 shots would be enough to get me pretty hungover and feeling like i'm gonna die the next day omg so painful, but that doesn't happen at all anymore which shocks me but i have a feeling being prescribed the klonopin is probably whats preventing a lot of negative side effects as the beginning stages of binge drinking.
This morning maybe the second or third time i noticed this happen but i noticed it more this time than before. I felt like my muscles were slightly achy? like my bones in my arms felt a little sore, and i noticed they had this weird shaking feeling to them. It was like if i didn't try real hard they would be slightly shaking not like jerks or violent movements but slight shakiness. I have heard and been fascinated by "the shakes" associated with heavy/chronic/daily alcohol use, and how many people drink to just get rid of the shakes and the even worse symptoms that start if they are addicted to alcohol. But why would i even have any feeling to slightly shake, slight sore muscles, and headache BUT THAT ALL WENT AWAY WHEN I TOOK MY MORNING 1MG DOSE OF KLONOPIN. I don't even get heartburn like i used to from drinking a long time ago when i wasn't on klonopin (or any meds). So if you had the interest to read my long ass shit, do you think continuing to drink 2 times a week ranging around 10-16 drinks a week will present any side effects if i keep at that amount? I feel like the klonopin is hiding certain sypmtoms that can or have started developing but idk if it can!
