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Gibberings CXLII : Frothing At The Mouth

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Tangerine Dream said:
Drug addiction can turn the nicest person into a cunt. ...

I don't have a balanced view on this because I don't know all the facts and I am 'friendly' to one person and bias. I think opinion of a person should be weighed fairly, including all the good/positive things they have done in life....

Taking joy in the misery of others isn't on, and giving people the benefit of the doubt/another chance is is something most people would accept as the right thing to do. Especially if drug use/addiction was the cause of someone doing a well hurtful selfish thing....

Revenge is shitty, but comes naturally for a lot of people. Admittedly I can relate to Monsta more than chinup here.
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it can, I've experienced this first hand and forgiven it, with my current boyf, addiction was not the main cause of the problems that caused the shitstorm on here. if it was, then monsta would still be with me, as the problems his addictions caused me are absolutely tiny in comparison to whats happened with my current boyf.

no one who wasn't in my home at the time knows all the facts and I bloody well wish they'd remember that before handing out judgement.

revenge is shitty- it should hopefully be clear, given this is a year after, that its also a desperate last ditch attempt provoked by how ill my attempt to move past this problem, by inviting people into my home again, made me. I would also like to say, I am not the only party here who has attempted revenge. me detailing it would be construed as vindictive bile and its not relevant. but both sides are equally shitty in this respect.
 
chinup said:
no one who wasn't in my home at the time knows all the facts and I bloody well wish they'd remember that before handing out judgement.
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And I wish YOU'D remember that this is a Harm Reduction website and not your personal boxing ring to use to get revenge on situations from your personal life by DELIBERATELY causing harm to others here.

Got it?

And to clarify Harm Reduction doesn't mean getting pleasure from being sadistic to other people here. Monstah has given a great deal of help to a great deal of people in EADD.

Keep this sadistic shit to PMs or off the board (it's clear monster does not want to publicly go through this with you). EADD is not here for this imo
 
I honestly think in time you will forgive him. Imagine going to your grave holding grudges? People need to be held accountable for their actions in life/to others. But people also need to be forgiven. When we fail to believe people can change we fail as a society. People make mistakes, however big...people can and do change/learn/grow.

EDIT

Life is a series of mistakes. We can only truly learn by making mistakes.

We hurt others repeatedly, often the people he care about most.
 
^ I agree. and when I see evidence of that, I will.

marmz- can you please point out the deliberate harm in any of my posts today. none of my posts today have been deliberately harmful, I have been trying to engage with what people have said, without going into specifics, to avoid any further harm. on the other hand, all your posts directed towards me appear to be deliberately harmful. so if you can't evidence your allegations, can you aat least, I ask again, lead by example?
 
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Seems like a good time to be on leave. Chin Up, you're twisted. Whatever justification you think you have, you're a million miles out. Good luck with that miserable head of yours.

Off to the beach.
 
chinup said:
^ I agree. and when I see evidence of that, I will.

marmz- can you please point out the deliberate harm in any of my posts today. none of my posts today have been deliberately harmful, I have been trying to engage with what people have said, without going into specifics, to avoid any further harm. on the other hand, all your posts directed towards me appear to be deliberately harmful. so if you can't evidence your allegations, can you aat least, I ask again, lead by example?
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It'll take more than a few posts for me to be convinced you're not here to continue to take pleasure from being cruel, to quote yourself.

Meanwhile, Monster is left without a voice, probably when he needs it most.

Forgive me if I don't fall for the butter wouldn't melt routine the day after you were enjoying being a sadist.

Doesn't wash, sorry. Cheap tactic actually. This is your forte
 
You have to give people a chance to change. People are good deep down, we are the product of our upbringing. I also feel you can't blame your parents for 'fucking you up' to use another example. They are the product of their upbringing/experiences in life. and it goes on and on. You can trace back 'blame' for eternity.

At some point you have to say, I'm going to stop blaming and 'move on'/learn/grow and hopefully don't make the same mistakes to your friends/kids etc.

I have been 'blamed' for my mates death by his parents and family. It's fucking horrible.
 
Top twat - you should be aware of the symbols you use. What you have is a very old sign used for a long time in things very dark.

I learned my lessons & given time you will too ;)
 
TD- that is fucking horrible. i'm sorry.

you're right about not being able to blame parents. the three best people I know had the worst parents imaginable.

monsta doesn't have a voice by his own choosing.

if I was here to take pleasure from being cruel, surely I'd have to actually be being cruel, so can you please fucking evidence that from my posts today?

actually, do you know what, I don't fucking care. you think what you like. you clearly know best. state your opinions of me as fact over the entire board. I am cruel sick individual, I have problems waaaay beyond my issues with monsta, blah blah blah. uyou're so fucking copassianate yet you use these accusations as weapons. you fucking wonderful caring individual. what a sad sad woman.
 
chinup said:
BL- I think the problem is this- I considered both his and my needs. he did not. this was clear time and again over a period of months and many people, tried to pull him up on this. in general, I don't think hurting people is right, ever. so I don't condone my own actions yesterday, but I do know that I do need closure on this issue and as monsta has been given ample ample chances and been explicitly told how I can have it, and not done it. so in this case, someone was going to get hurt- either me by continuing not being able to trust or really interact with anyone. or him. I chose him.

tl;dr- in this case, someone being hurt was unavoidable.
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Closure is a crazy thing - lets just say the person you were seeking closure from dies. Do you live the rest of your life feeling bitter because you demand closure? If you really want to beat yourself up over something you have no control over then go for it. You can give yourself closure - you made a mistake/you were taken advantage of/shit happened. Reflect, learn from it and move on. Much better for your sake of mind (hate eats you alive) - I've been shit on before (not literally - well ...) I've had my life turned upside down before - that certainly does not stop me loving, caring or putting my trust in the next person that comes along that needs my help.

Lesson has been learnt - you now know better.

You do not like Monstanoodle - we get it, some of us do though and although we feel sorry for what happened to you we certainly do not want to lose friendship/contact with Monstanoodle because of this (as it has nothing to do with us).

If you find it impossible to frequent a forum because of his presence then stay away - don't poison it for the rest of us?
 
chinup said:
TD- that is fucking horrible. i'm sorry.

you're right about not being able to blame parents. the three best people I know had the worst parents imaginable.

monsta doesn't have a voice by his own choosing.

if I was here to take pleasure from being cruel, surely I'd have to actually be being cruel, so can you please fucking evidence that from my posts today?

actually, do you know what, I don't fucking care. you think what you like. you clearly know best. state your opinions of me as fact over the entire board. I am cruel sick individual, I have problems waaaay beyond my issues with monsta, blah blah blah. uyou're so fucking copassianate yet you use these accusations as weapons. you fucking wonderful caring individual. what a sad sad woman.
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I'm not going to empathise with someone who has come here deliberately to make someone else feel bad to the point of being suicidal, just to make themselves feel better, and who ENJOYS doing it, and in a place that is about the EXACT FUCKING OPPOSITE.

Not happening lady. No matter how much you try to turn it around to woe is you.

Come here in a different manner, and then you'll get different treatment. A few posts trying to justify your sadistic attack and try to forget what you just did doesn't wash.

StoneHappyMonday said:
Seems like a good time to be on leave. Chin Up, you're twisted. Whatever justification you think you have, you're a million miles out. Good luck with that miserable head of yours.
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^^ This.

Maybe you might see reason from another source.
 
Bearlove said:
that certainly does not stop me loving, caring or putting my trust in the next person that comes along that needs my help.
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but how? how can you do it? I know i'm not likely to get closure, but I want to stop being the cold distant individual I've become and I don't know how. the thought just fills with panic, I don't want to be hospitalised due to misplacing my trust again. tbh I've pretty much resigned myself to a very solitary existence, but I don't like it.
 
chinup said:
but how? how can you do it? I know i'm not likely to get closure, but I want to stop being the cold distant individual I've become and I don't know how. the thought just fills with panic, I don't want to be hospitalised due to misplacing my trust again. tbh I've pretty much resigned myself to a very solitary existence, but I don't like it.
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How? You have closure 'now' - shit happened that was out of your control / not your fault - lesson learned / subject closed. The lesson you learned from this changes you - makes you a bit more savvy the next time a similar situation come along (will never leave you - it shouldn't as its a great learning tool). Don't start to hide in yourself - you know who you are, you know how much people enjoyed your company before this - work on that.

You have friends? If your closing yourself off from them then start slowly - facebook with them, txt them - let the real 'you' surface again. You have to take a leap of faith and start trusting people again (hardest part I know) but pick a mate, go to their house with a bottle or wine (or drug of choice) sit, chill talk shit - tell them you can't stay long (so you have a get out excuse if it all gets too much). Stay as long as your comfortable and then leave - rinse / repeat / ask if another friend would like to join you. When your comfortable with that then invite them to yours.

Stop living with hatred :)
 
I'll tell you whats crap.

All these fucking alts are crap.

I haven't a clue who anyone is, unless you're on here 24/7 it's impossible to keep up.

Crap.


Chinup, for what its worth i don't blame you for being angry and wanting the truth out there. I hope you feel better now and in time can get over it.

In future don't invite internet strangers into your home, even if they do type in purple font ;)
 
ALL the alts?

Well fuck the lot of you.

chinup said:
but how? how can you do it? I know i'm not likely to get closure, but I want to stop being the cold distant individual I've become and I don't know how. the thought just fills with panic, I don't want to be hospitalised due to misplacing my trust again. tbh I've pretty much resigned myself to a very solitary existence, but I don't like it.
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Get over yourself, eh?
 
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