mydrugbuddy
Bluelighter
Does anyone rememember that funny Harry Enfield sketch where he plays the part of the German tourist aplogising for the conduct of his country during the war ?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grzd7paD6ts
I'd like to do a simillarly ridiculously pompous thing. Since i joined this site it had always been my moto and really my nature, as a believer in treating others how you would like to be treated, to try treat everyone with respect and courtesy and avoid all "wars".
That policy was flung out the window for a few weeks, for some reason to do with heavy drug consumption and then stopping. Of course it is my reponsibilty to take drugs to a level at which i can interact decently with other human beings if i am going to be interacting (whther IRL or an a forum). I forgot that somewhere along the line.#
#
I have been totally out of order with nearly everyone, including some of the kindest most helpful people here, and now that i realise that i am genuinely sorry. I had become closed minded and filled with rage. Something was very wrong.
This may expian if not tldr;
I switched from 150mg sertraline to 15mg mirtazapine a couple of weeks ago. I have been having trouble sleeping since i stopped taking AH7921 acouple of months ago and am also dependent on benzos and opiates. I am heavily cutting down the benzos (10 etiz per night now)which may explain the sleep problem. Although the sleep problem initially arose when i stopped taking 2 specific opiates about 6 months ago. Everything mut be interlinked in a way that is neyong my comprehension. Maybe its just gonna be a rough period that im just gonna have to ride out, and "give time time". How much fuckin time to have to give though, months possibly i guess after what I've been doing to myself, I cant help but feel so foolish.
On the positive side I have noticed i am feeling calmer than normal during the day and is putting that down to the Mirtazapine as i am reducing my benzo use rapidly and never take any during the day. But i am also experiencing very low motivation and keep loosing objects. I suspect I may be also be expereincing withdrawls from the high dose sertraline that I had been on for a long time.
I am not sure what form those sert w/d would take but had heard that sert is horrific to w/d from and was expecting the first month to be very bad anyway.
Mitrtazapine is not helping me to sleep at all (most other users of it say it helps them massively) and my mood is at a very low ebb, so I am rotating (to avoid further dependencaies) a load of other sleeping pills to try help with sleep at least- diphenhydramine, zopiclone, phenergan, chloropromazine (the stuff that has you drooling and bouncing from wall to wall )concentrated valerian root etc whilst simultaneaously cutting down benzos.
The whole situation is one hell of a mess really, with a huge amount of variables its amost impossible to identify any root cause IMO. I may try doubling my low dose prescribed mirtazapine to see what that does. Currently after i eventually fall slkeep i am waking up every hour or so during the night; craving confectionary like mad, smoking cigarettes, taking a few more hits on a bong and is then eventually falling back to sleep again.
I'm guessing that sertraline w/ds may be playing a large part in the mood problem, and as etizolam wasnt helping me sleep anyway (i have blown out that tolerance theshold due to over indulgence.)
I know its a very complicated situation, and if anyone botherd to digest it do you have any comments please ? I should add that I am not feeling so defensive (i dont know what the fuck was up with me the last 2-3 weeks) so i will not fly off the handle in a rtage attack at anyone who tries to help. What kind of behaviour was that ?
It's a rhetorical question. I know the answer. I could easily blame the drugs but of course the resposibilty to use them at a level appropriate to the situation was down to me. And if i cant control myselof on drugs then i should not be tking them atall.
Im so glad to have recovered enough clarity of mind to be able to finally see all that at least. Ive been in one hell of a "fug" for the past month.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grzd7paD6ts
I'd like to do a simillarly ridiculously pompous thing. Since i joined this site it had always been my moto and really my nature, as a believer in treating others how you would like to be treated, to try treat everyone with respect and courtesy and avoid all "wars".
That policy was flung out the window for a few weeks, for some reason to do with heavy drug consumption and then stopping. Of course it is my reponsibilty to take drugs to a level at which i can interact decently with other human beings if i am going to be interacting (whther IRL or an a forum). I forgot that somewhere along the line.#
#
I have been totally out of order with nearly everyone, including some of the kindest most helpful people here, and now that i realise that i am genuinely sorry. I had become closed minded and filled with rage. Something was very wrong.
This may expian if not tldr;
I switched from 150mg sertraline to 15mg mirtazapine a couple of weeks ago. I have been having trouble sleeping since i stopped taking AH7921 acouple of months ago and am also dependent on benzos and opiates. I am heavily cutting down the benzos (10 etiz per night now)which may explain the sleep problem. Although the sleep problem initially arose when i stopped taking 2 specific opiates about 6 months ago. Everything mut be interlinked in a way that is neyong my comprehension. Maybe its just gonna be a rough period that im just gonna have to ride out, and "give time time". How much fuckin time to have to give though, months possibly i guess after what I've been doing to myself, I cant help but feel so foolish.
On the positive side I have noticed i am feeling calmer than normal during the day and is putting that down to the Mirtazapine as i am reducing my benzo use rapidly and never take any during the day. But i am also experiencing very low motivation and keep loosing objects. I suspect I may be also be expereincing withdrawls from the high dose sertraline that I had been on for a long time.
I am not sure what form those sert w/d would take but had heard that sert is horrific to w/d from and was expecting the first month to be very bad anyway.
Mitrtazapine is not helping me to sleep at all (most other users of it say it helps them massively) and my mood is at a very low ebb, so I am rotating (to avoid further dependencaies) a load of other sleeping pills to try help with sleep at least- diphenhydramine, zopiclone, phenergan, chloropromazine (the stuff that has you drooling and bouncing from wall to wall )concentrated valerian root etc whilst simultaneaously cutting down benzos.
The whole situation is one hell of a mess really, with a huge amount of variables its amost impossible to identify any root cause IMO. I may try doubling my low dose prescribed mirtazapine to see what that does. Currently after i eventually fall slkeep i am waking up every hour or so during the night; craving confectionary like mad, smoking cigarettes, taking a few more hits on a bong and is then eventually falling back to sleep again.
I'm guessing that sertraline w/ds may be playing a large part in the mood problem, and as etizolam wasnt helping me sleep anyway (i have blown out that tolerance theshold due to over indulgence.)
I know its a very complicated situation, and if anyone botherd to digest it do you have any comments please ? I should add that I am not feeling so defensive (i dont know what the fuck was up with me the last 2-3 weeks) so i will not fly off the handle in a rtage attack at anyone who tries to help. What kind of behaviour was that ?
It's a rhetorical question. I know the answer. I could easily blame the drugs but of course the resposibilty to use them at a level appropriate to the situation was down to me. And if i cant control myselof on drugs then i should not be tking them atall.
Im so glad to have recovered enough clarity of mind to be able to finally see all that at least. Ive been in one hell of a "fug" for the past month.
Last edited:
