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  • EADD Moderators: Shambles

what a goosd excuse for mnot searcinmg for any jobs until day 14 of your job search

mydrugbuddy said:
YOU, forgive the shouting, are the one person that does not understand at all.

I dont want a job.

I want to go back to college in September to pursure my further education, rather than spend another 23 years doing soul destroying jobs that are so awful they have my colleagues weeping in the toilet cubicles as the treatment they receive is so inhumane.

About 40 % of our office has been on anti depressants at any one time. :|

We have a little corner called "The Sertraline Corner" where all 3 of us swallow(ed) that garbage in tha vain hope its gonna help. It didnt. It dioesnt. It wont. Rant over. Off to see about the ESA form now.

Plus that fuckin manager who says im not productive look at all iove done in the last 2 hours, with loiads more to come. Ya fakin dumb bitch. I genuinely pity her husband.
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dude, with an attitude like that no amount of further education is going to help you.
 
karmanaut said:
dude, with an attitude like that no amount of further education is going to help you.
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oh shove this ancient histiory where even archimedes couldnt find it. Yawn.

You have no idea of the ten years of history that lies behind my comment, or what hell ive been through this week, yet you feel entitled to sit in holier than though judgement and pontificate on your versions of how to get on in this world.

No one would have have been in a positive frame of mind at that point, after what I'd been through the precedding few days. You wouldnt have a clue or give shit though.

Christ. I fuckin hate BLUELIGHT and especially EADD at times like this, after comments like that. From now on, im not starting any new threads (too many negative piss takers) and will only be talking to the people on here i consider as friends. That will mostly be done by pm.

Ill be more in the other sections of the forum rather than this one. EADD isnt for me anymore.

I fear ut has been killed by trolls and morons. There's no shotage of either of them. Ive certainlky had enough of them anyway.

It's such a waste of time responding to thoughtless posts like this one.

I know, if i dont lke it i know what i can do, which is what i am doing.
 
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mydrugbuddy said:
oh shove this ancient histiory where even archimedes couldnt find it. Yawn.

You have no idea of the ten years of history that lies behind my comment, or what hell ive been through this week, yet you feel entitled to sit in holier than though judgement and pontificate on your versions of how to get on in this world.

No one would have have been in a positive frame of mind at that point, after what I'd been through the precedding few days. You wouldnt have a clue or give shit though.

Christ. I fuckin hate BLUELIGHT and especially EADD at times like this, after comments like that. From now on, im not starting any new threads (too many negative piss takers) and will only be talking to the people on here i consider as friends. That will mostly be done by pm.

Ill be more in the other sections of the forum rather than this one. EADD isnt for me anymore.

I fear ut has been killed by trolls and morons. There's no shotage of either of them. Ive certainlky had enough of them anyway.

It's such a waste of time responding to thoughtless posts like this one.

I know, if i dont lke it i know what i can do, which is what i am doing.
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Why don't you want to get a job? Is it because a JC minimum wage job would be beneath your abilities? If so, I think a lot of the unemployed world feel that way, and if it's true it's fair enough IMO. I'd like to think that I'd prefer to have a job than no job, but I've not been in that position so I don't know if it's true. I'm aware that being on benefits gives you free access to some types of further education, so again, if that's the case, fair play.

Unfortunately I suspect that'd count as an excuse rather than a reason to the cunts. Could you play the mental health card? Given your posts of late, I don't think that'd be a lie....

Don't interpret this as trolling, but your post reminds me of Mugz. I don't mean that in a jokey way. Mugz said "last 9 years of my life" not 10, and was on sick pay not benefits, but there are similarities! He also interpreted people being honest/concerned on EADD as people 'having a go'. People here remember him as 'troubled' not as a twat. I know your posts come off to me that way. I also know from my own perspective that I'd flip out at unwanted 'worry' of bluelighters -- they don't know you and have no right to assume they do, right? I can understand that. Look, good luck and hope you feel better.
 
WithMyLife said:
Could you play the mental health card? Given your posts of late, I don't think that'd be a lie....
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That's a bit mild. Check out this quote from last night:

I JUST WANT TO EMPHASISIE THAT I DONT COME HERE LOOKING TO START VERBAL WARS WITH EVERYONE, THOUGH THAT SEENMS TO BE THE INMPRESSION PEOPLE HAVE GAINED SINCE THE NIGHT OF MY MELTDOWN. THEY DONT APPEAR TO BE ABGLE TO UNDERSTAND THAT IT WAS AN ILLNESS OUTSIDE OF MY OWN CONTROL. WELL IF IM PROVOKING ANYONE ELSE WITHOUT REALISING IT MODS PLEASE LET ME KNOW AND ILL TRY TO CHANGE MY WAYS. WHAT ELSE CAN I SAY OR DO ?
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MDB, if it really is an illness outside of your control that causes these meltdowns, then you should not take that lightly.

I think that "going in-patient" might not necessarily be the worst option for you.
 
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Thanks WML for putting some thought into your post. Btw I have been advised to play the mental health card/ drug addict card by the JSA themselves !

By the person who actually interviews me.!

He says he can clealrly see im not well or fit for work. I just need some help reading and digesting the 300 page guide to filling in the ESA next week - i'll get the help at my clinic

Lurch if i ever have another benzo rage attack im checking myself in. But as im cutting down now (from unknown aamounts to 20 etizolams so far 8)

like mugz i was jyst drinking/sipping bupe like a liquer so i have absolutely no idea how much of that i was taking, the oinly way i could judge was by how hard it was to not fall over the next day. If i couldnt stand upp atall then i knew id probably overdone it it a wee tadthe day before.

i dont understand yout last sentence lurch, it doesnt make sense, however, tbh, i dont think i want to. Theres only so many unpleaeant truths about themselves that a person can handle at any one time. I think Ive had my fill this week if you dont mind. Hence the defensiveness.

I dont think theres been any problems between youreelf and I Lurch so i certainly dont want another potential source of useful help and practical suggestions to have to be out on IGNORE. (of couyrse its a 2 way street though im not great atm, there will be a time again, when i am once again fit and well enough to be able to try to help anyone else, should they ever want that)

I do have huge bouncebackabilty though so may be ready to listen to some of the thoughtful, well meaning posts at least. Forget the abusive ones. The perpertrators of most of them are on ignore anyway. <3

2 typing mistakes so far this morning - (no snail pace either) so i think that means that the phenaz is virtually purged and my head can start clearing now.

Ive often reflected that i can see a lot of mugz in myself. Thankfully (for me) i have passed the stage of my drug taking career where i would jut recleslessly bosh unknown amounts of whatever was in fron of me. Starting to measure your use may sound trivial, but its a big first step towards reganing control. Now my articularity has returned i dont wanna stop typing, but i shant indulge me self or bore the readers just for the sake of it, as i have nothing further to add at this moment.

Except THANKS AGAIN to the people who habe been kind and supportive throughout this. I possibly could no have made it through this without you. <3
 
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I didn't see that post. Is the illness in question drug addiction mdb? Or is the benzo problem a result of an underlying problem? Either way, can you seek help and truthfully go on benefits because you're unable to work?

Either way I think we should all have more empathy/sympathy. mdb isn't the only one to have had a drug related meltdown on here!! Honestly, between this and the "legally high" thread I can't believe how unsympathetic people on here are. How many of us have REALLY stayed 100% in control of/on drugs 100% of the time. I know I haven't.
 
yeah MDB I think if people are offering you help, and there is help available, you should jump on it and use it while it's still there.
 
Ive seen part 1 of the form and i can easily score maximum points in that one. Dunno how many more sections i habe to ploght through after that. GHod isnt it nice to be aving a cicvilized chat on the net, such a nice change from recent days (i know mostly brought up on myself)
 
mydrugbuddy said:
i have mutiple drug addictions with several underlying mental health issues.
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It is possible to overcome both of those, it seems to me like you need to let other people who are willing to help you actually give you that help, there's no shame in taking them up on it.

At least you can acknowledge that you've got a problem and that's the first most important step, not being in denial. It's difficult to step outside of your own situation from time to time and see the bigger picture, especially if you keep just blotting it out with drugs.

dont' mean to sound preachy or cliched thats just how i see it, and I can speak from experience to some extent.
 
ive been under the wing of drug services for about 9 months now. The system itself is appallingky badly run; the left truely hand hasnt a clue what the right hand is doing. There are some fantastic wokers there though. Perfectly willing to give up their evening if youve failed to make a counselling session due to sleeping in or something, (They are mostly voulunteers too)

so yeah im geting proffessional help. The NHS "help" has been laughable, no wonder indian pharmacies are doing a booming trade.
The speaking therapies are very helpful though. Im finding im like an onion; making one break through only to discover there'es several more layers of shit lurking beneath.

You know what though i wouldnt change my life for the world, i love it. I know where im going and exactly what im gonna do once im well enough.
 
is attention a drug?



this is getting boring now. cut down on the drugs. there wasnt any problem a couple months back. forum isnt filled with trolls, youre just a paranoid wreck mdb. everyones fed up of your drug adled rants. pull yourself together, maybe ceres can help you via pm - he did the whole online breakdown thing himself a week or two ago, what with his brutal life that none of us understand 8)

absolutely cringeworthy, the pair of you. either leave the drugs or the internet alone till you sort yourselves out. shits getting old now
 
narh ive just placed everyone who cant speak to each other in a civil tone on ignore (about 30 % of the membership)

its suddenly a friendly, happy, peacufull, harmonious, helpful, and supportive place once again now. :D

Got shit loads of stuff sorted out today noe the phenaz is being cleaned from my system.,

#sorted all my finances (my god what a jumbled mess they were)

Just have to concentrate on building my confidence for the college open days next week now, now all the mockers and people who love to put others down are gone it wont be half the battle it would have been othjerwise.

To paraphrase; theres nothing wrong with me, its everyone else whose got the problem. Well about 30 % of the members on here anyway. What bliss never to have to hear from those "people" again.

The place just needed a very heavy pruning. All is well now. My confidence and health is growing by thr hour. Stimulants have been elimiated to stabilise my mood and etizolams soon down to 18.

Fuckin delighted how ive turned this around from the brink of total disaster, and so quickly, and all by myself with just a little much much appreciated online support from the decent and modest soles on here.

. I know ive done the right thing and the more it pisses off the negative elements of the forum the better.
 
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