How Anxiety Came Into My Life

AnrBjotk

Bluelighter
Joined
May 18, 2010
Messages
267
Location
Norway
Where do I begin? I love to tell my sop story of heart ache, but I'll spare you this time.
Suffice to say I have always been depressed (with a two year hiatus due to love), but social anxiety was never an issue until about two years ago.
I was always shy, very shy, but more avoidant than anxious and I had no problems speaking in public or being in public spaces. But after my drug addiction stint, and after three years of antidepressants, I suddenly became literally scared of people and social situations. Chances are that I always had this, but avoided it by avoiding social situations and therefore never experiencing social anxiety.
But being 26 it's harder to avoid people than at 17.

Right now I'm on subutex and Remeron for depression and insomnia. I kicked Effexor without my doctors consent because it completely removed my sex drive.
About a year ago I ran out of Remeron and was out of scripts. My doctor was on holiday and I went two weeks without. I had the most intense social anxiety I have ever had and gained a lot of respect for Remeron.
The fact that lack of Remeron gave increased social anxiety led me to believe that taking Remeron relieved it. Now, I'm sure medical data disproves this, but I have always been very susceptible and a classic "Placebo-thinker". So, strangely, because I believed Remeron took away my social anxiety, it sort of did... At least more than it did before and more than the data implies.
A tiny amount of progress.
Sadly, my last two years of school did a lot of damage because of combination - I'm convinced - of paranoia and actual bullying at my school and ruined any confidence I ever had in that department.

Trouble is: I have no friends anymore. Not really. I also have no job anymore. I have been living of savings for two months and although I meet my girlfriend/S.O. every weekend, I spend a lot of time alone. Therefore I am more anxious about little things like going to the shops. Even passing strangers in the street makes me forget momentarily how to walk.
This is worrying, of course. How much worse will it get?
Even more worrying is that 28 of august I start a writing work shop. It's about 15 people of selected people attending a publishing house run course. (Yes, I am boasting - this is my tiny sliver of some achievement in my life today.)
AND knowing my current pattern, I know I will be SO shy I will be unable to look people in the eye, speak out loud and be social. AND I know from experience that unless you perform in this way the first few times, you get labelled and shun - at least in part. So I need to avoid this.
Question is how.
Drugs? Alcohol? Saving up subutex?
Mind exercises fly out the window in the face of my extreme shyness/anxiety. (Case in point: I was SO shy that even at a social anxiety group therapy, I was too shy to speak in front of the group...)

With my subutex-treatment I'm sure I'll have a harder time getting benzos from my psychiatrist. But should I try? Or try for a less narcotic anxiety med?
In my defence, I have only taken benzos "illegally" a few times because though they did help with anxiety, they made me very depressed, so abuse was never a worry.
I live in ScandiEurope where benzos are more frowned upon and less easily given patients.
But what else can I do?
I know doing nothing will lead to disaster, but also that over-thinking it will make it worse still.

Imagine having the social confidence of a four year old hiding behind mommy's skirt and you have some idea of my current state of mind.

Cheers in advance.
 
How's your aptitude for chemistry?
I recommend strongly that you explore the work of people such as Carl Pfeiffer - like conventional psychiatry he made the argument that many mood disorders relate to abnormal function within the mono-aminergic system , however his work on the underlying causes for this dsyfunction made his work precisely 17'000 times better than conventional psychiatry (at least that is my opinion).
Histadelia, histapenia, pyrroluria are examples of biochemical imbalances that are
A). potentially completely debilitating (and perhaps unimaginably painful)
b). Highly treatable
This is from http://www.alternativementalhealth.com/articles/walsh.htm
'After getting extensive biochemical data on more than 3,000 persons diagnosed with clinical depression, we found that 95% of them fit neatly into one of 5 separate biochemical classifications. Depression is not a single condition, but an umbrella term covering several completely different conditions. Anyway, we believe we have identified the 5 primary phenotypes..... each with their own classic symptoms and each with completely different treatment needs.'

'Low-histamine depressives are usually nervous, anxious individuals who are prone to paranoia and despair.' - (i got my results from Biolab back a while ago and it's safe to say i fall very much into the category of 'histapenic' (low-histamine), and whilst i don't really have paranoia i think i can perhaps relate somewhat to the 'despair' aspect.

Give the web page a read, and try find out if you fall into any of these categories.
FYI, whilst it is hardly a long-term solution, i have found that etizolam can be useful from time to time - it's somewhat unique chemically, and may allow you some relief from anxiety like conventional benzos without the well known 'deadening' effect of drugs like diazepam.
Good luck!
 
How's your aptitude for chemistry?
I recommend strongly that you explore the work of people such as Carl Pfeiffer - like conventional psychiatry he made the argument that many mood disorders relate to abnormal function within the mono-aminergic system , however his work on the underlying causes for this dsyfunction made his work precisely 17'000 times better than conventional psychiatry (at least that is my opinion).
Histadelia, histapenia, pyrroluria are examples of biochemical imbalances that are
A). potentially completely debilitating (and perhaps unimaginably painful)
b). Highly treatable
This is from http://www.alternativementalhealth.com/articles/walsh.htm
'After getting extensive biochemical data on more than 3,000 persons diagnosed with clinical depression, we found that 95% of them fit neatly into one of 5 separate biochemical classifications. Depression is not a single condition, but an umbrella term covering several completely different conditions. Anyway, we believe we have identified the 5 primary phenotypes..... each with their own classic symptoms and each with completely different treatment needs.'

'Low-histamine depressives are usually nervous, anxious individuals who are prone to paranoia and despair.' - (i got my results from Biolab back a while ago and it's safe to say i fall very much into the category of 'histapenic' (low-histamine), and whilst i don't really have paranoia i think i can perhaps relate somewhat to the 'despair' aspect.

Give the web page a read, and try find out if you fall into any of these categories.
FYI, whilst it is hardly a long-term solution, i have found that etizolam can be useful from time to time - it's somewhat unique chemically, and may allow you some relief from anxiety like conventional benzos without the well known 'deadening' effect of drugs like diazepam.
Good luck!

It's interesting. It's fully possible it's all chemical; that the anxiety/depression was the cause of my problems and not the other way around. That's always the grey area... Did the depression come from bad situations or did the depression cause bad situation.
I've always believed that my life has been shitty enough to warrant depression, but... who knows.
It's sort of moot anyway because a) I can't abuse pills illegally as I take weekly urine tests and b) Whatever I'll take in terms of pills, will have to be prescribed. And if prescribed anything it would prolly be regular benzos or oxazepam...
 
how i deal with social anxiety is not caring what people think of me which has turned me from socially anxious to anti social but people who do give a gruff looks well older than his age cause of beard drug user looking individual time to talk to me and get to know me like me which has made me try to give people a chance but for the most part i'm still getting over the i hate everyone phase but if the person you are and want to project yourself as doesn't fall into the anti social category of folk then not caring what people think of you is the perfect solution
 
how i deal with social anxiety is not caring what people think of me which has turned me from socially anxious to anti social but people who do give a gruff looks well older than his age cause of beard drug user looking individual time to talk to me and get to know me like me which has made me try to give people a chance but for the most part i'm still getting over the i hate everyone phase but if the person you are and want to project yourself as doesn't fall into the anti social category of folk then not caring what people think of you is the perfect solution

Wow... Were you drunk, sir? I didn't get a lot of that.
But as for not caring... I try. But caring what others think is ingrained because of low selfesteem. Besides, I want to be loved too.
 
nah i got over social anxiety by not caring what people think about me which on first impressions is that i'm a junkie loser who no one would want to associate with and people thinking this way of me has lead me to be very prejudice to everyone i come across but i'm trying to get over that because they're are good people out there if more people would get to know me more people would like me which may lead me to like them so i'm trying to overcome anti socialism i couldn't get over social anxiety unless i went the opposite direction not giving a shit what people think about me and becoming anti social
 
nah i got over social anxiety by not caring what people think about me which on first impressions is that i'm a junkie loser who no one would want to associate with and people thinking this way of me has lead me to be very prejudice to everyone i come across but i'm trying to get over that because they're are good people out there if more people would get to know me more people would like me which may lead me to like them so i'm trying to overcome anti socialism i couldn't get over social anxiety unless i went the opposite direction not giving a shit what people think about me and becoming anti social

"anti socialism". That's high-larious.
But I get your point, I think.
 
i'm not sure if my experience of social anxiety / self-consciousness is the same as yours, but maybe sharing my experience(s) could help you out somehow.

social anxiety can be very disabling, and it can consume so much of a person's time and effort--the worst part, IMO, is dwelling over things that have passed; for example, "oh i said something awkward in that social gathering, i bet everybody thinks i'm a fool." and then you keep thinking about it over and over, well after the incident has passed. but here is an article that provides a scientifically-supported view about how others may or may not be noticing the screw-ups you make: http://homepage.psy.utexas.edu/homepage/class/psy301/niederhoffer/Articles/spotlight.html

the funny thing is most people are really too busy with their own act to ever analyze anybody else's. plus, even if they did try to figure out the behavior or personality of somebody else, their analysis would probably be filtered and influenced by their own experiences and projections.

it might be easier for you to relax if you look forward to activities and goals rather than social interaction. it's great that you have a writers workshop to look forward to. remember that you don't have to be articulate or impressive, just say what you have to say and mean it. there's nothing wrong with being shy. all the same, i also suggest trying to contact old friends / acquaintances; you don't have to hit it off or have loads of fun, sometimes just having a simple conversation is enough to satisfy the social element that is essential to mental and emotional health. think of it as a tennis match, he or she says something, then you say something, etc., back and forth; it doesn't have to be perfect. dealing with others sometimes help to create a stronger foundation of who you are, and that's another great way to reduce social anxiety.

good luck! if nothing else, remember that most of the minor problems we face will have been dealt with or forgotten in five years time. not much sense in spending too much time worrying on things that will only be forgotten in the greater scheme of things.
 
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