NA issues

[ArtVandalay]

I'm working steps with a sponsor. I like meeting with him. My problem is NA meetings. I grew up in the Mormon church. NA meetings feel like Mormon testimony meetings (for those unfamiliar, testimony meetings are where members get up and preach about how much they love the church and have faith in god etc.) It gets repetitive. Addicts preaching about how much they love the program, have faith in it, etc. I don't know if I've hit a plateau or am just bored with it. Or jealous because I haven't had a spiritual awakening. Just feel like I'm going through the motions. Anyone else feel this way?

 

[deidara]

I have felt that way about meetings too, sometimes it is boring and repetitive. But other times, someone will say exactly what you need to hear. Take what you need and leave the rest is advice I like to follow, though it can be hard in the fellowship because if you aren't doing everything the way people tell you to, some people might think you aren't working the program. Spiritual awakenings can happen in many ways, not just by going to meetings or working steps (though the steps might speed it up if you are absolutely deeply honest). I get the Mormon thing too, my mom's whole side of the family are Mormons who live in Utah so I know a little bit about Mormonism. Maybe try to find some new meetings, some have topics or speakers, but I feel you, it seems like whenever someone shares about gratitude, the whole meeting turns into a gratitude meeting and its good to be grateful for what we have, but it hearing about it day after day gets old quick.

 

[thedawn]

yes,this drives me crazy too.
however,theres so much more to the meeting.
for me it's worth the irritation.
I never had friends,not really.dont know how to behave around people.
I'm learning slowly in AA how to be a person.
let them eat cake,ignore,and do your own thing.

 

[neversickanymore]

They drove me flapping nuts... so I just meditate through the whole beginning cultish stuff and come back into focus for the sharing part of the meeting.. also remember you are allowed to share whatever you like and since I didn't like the fact that I would here the same NA/AA slogan phrases over and over i started bring up ideas that I hadn't heard regurgitated over and over.. Like ideas about how an individual chooses to perceive their life actually is how that life is.. yeah i got some crazy looks from the old timers and cant imagine how this would have went over in a group of hardcore old school Big bookers in AA.. but I felt and still do that all the new things i share have helped me enormously.. to the point that I no longer relate on a core level to addicts in the fellowships like i once did.. but i hate addiction and am willing to take a couple of snide "this isn't NA talk because i havn't heard it before" looks because i know that these concepts have made a huge positive difference for me.. and like so many things in addiction, since they made a difference for me they also have made a difference for others... because people after meetings have told me so.. I also dont hit so many meetings any more because i have replaced them with other things, I have developed, to make my recovery and my life all the more enjoyable and balanced. On the crazy out cries of praise for the fellowships i think this serves a purpose as addicts that are just finding the fellowships need to think and believe that this is possible.. and like i said life is how you percieve it, and you perceptions are based on your thoughts, and if you start to think and say that the fellowships are the most amazing thing and they have made your life an amazing blessing.. then low and behold your life becomes an amazing blessing.

 

[DrunkardsDream]

I do not like this either about AA and NA how they are cult like and like a religion or substitute addiction for some people.

 

[itsALLfake]

It's really a matter of where you are. I was in Prescott, AZ, which is a huge AA town...just about everyone was into drug use with some or no drinking involved to call themselves alcoholic. In AZ, I enjoyed going to AA and HA. I was surrounded by young people with similar backgrounds. No one went on a typical, bullshit repetition of "carrying the message" rant, which is what you're responsible for after working the steps, but it seems like when most people focus on solution, it ends up being the same things they've heard before from old timers.

I would still go to meetings today if I had what I had out West. I expected things to be different when I got back home but not as different as they turned out. It's unbelievable that people would go to a meeting and just say what they think others want to hear them say. I fought really hard to become the individual I became today, regardless that opiates were the end result of that fight. I worked the steps, but I probably wouldn't have if I didn't find the sponsor I gained such a good friendship with...I definitely wouldn't have if I didn't get taken to a transitional facility where they force you to go to meetings and at least look like you're working the steps. I ended up going hard on them just to see if it would work for me. I didn't take in the whole appreciation others had to it, but I've always been "punk rock."

I'm also pro AA, and I have a rather heavy disposition to NA. Spiritual discovery isn't made by a step work-book. Answering 50+ questions for each step won't keep you sober either.

Just remember, every meeting is your meeting. You get out what you put in, and you can state that you feel like people are full of shit when you share. You'll get ugly looks and judgment, but I guarantee you, the people that hear and feel what you're saying are the people you want to be associated with.

I'm joining the military...that seems like the best option for me. Thrill seeking outside of drugs is rather expensive, and adrenaline is the only real consistent high I can gamble with now. You'll always be addicted to something. If you're not, your life probably sucks or you don't know what you really like..

Good luck with your recovery.

 

[cashmunny]

I don't know if I've hit a plateau or am just bored with it. Or jealous because I haven't had a spiritual awakening. Just feel like I'm going through the motions. Anyone else feel this way?

I think it's fairly rare for people to have a sudden life changing spiritual experience. A monk once told me that it's much more common for it to be like a dimmer switch. The lights come on slowly rather than all at once.

And when you look back at where you were when you first started out, day 1 of being sober, I'll bet you can see progress. It's just that it happens so slowly you aren't aware of the change.