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Am I about to "Loose the Magic"?

SilentRoller

SilentRoller

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 9, 2012
Messages
972
Hey Everyone,
This may seem like a strange question, but I feel a tad guilty about a night out I had recently and I would like some advice on it.

My previous MDMA experiences had been few and far between: I first took MDMA in 2011 and had an absolutely insane time with my girlfriend of then, but I then waited 2 years until my next experience (had one 5/6APB experience in December of 2012). So in Febuary of thhis year, I got a connection for some party-flock pills and decided to re-kindle my experience with MDMA on the 21st of Feburary this year: I dropped a whole pill (spread out between two halves in the evening), and it blew my face off (so much so, that I was ejected from a club for rolling too hard=D.

After this, I waited over a month with no drugs taken inbetween (apart from a low dose of mushrooms), and then on the 2/3/2013 (2 days ago), I decided to have another MDMA experience as a friend came to visit who I hadn't seen in years, and we decided to have a massive night out. So, we started with dropping half a pill each at 9pm, and I came up nicely by about 9:30pm. This is where it got a bit stupid, somehow (I don't know why) I convinced myself that the pill was leveling out and that I was coming down, so I ended up in the whole night taking a total of 2 pills (total = circa 400mg). Needless to say, I was an absolute mess (anyone who wants to see can view my post in the "pictures of you having fun" thread), and I had an incredible night.

However, I am left with a terrible guilty feeling: A feeling that I knew I over did it, and I shouldn't of taken that much. I know that I knew better than that, but I somehow convinced myself that the half was tapering off at 10:30pm and decided to just keep redosing throughout the night. However, my fear is that I have ruined the future MDMA experiences that I wish to have, as since my dose was so high, I am worried I am in danger of losing the magic. Don't ask e why I feel so guilty about it, I'm not sure myself. I think its just because I know that MDMA deserves more respect, and I feel like I abused it on my last night out. I aim to now leave a break of at least 1 month + ( I always do with anything as a matter of principle).

I just want advice about what I did, as I feel like a bit of a tool, and that I should know better.

Thanks

SR
 
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Shit! Just realised the typo...well this is awkward. Thanks for the "constructive" comment though.
 
You're over-thinking it. The guilt is founded based on your knowledge that you over-did it, but everybody makes mistakes. More often than not most people experience a night or two where they regret their drug consumption. Lighten up on yourself, you overdid it once, but your prior use has been very moderate and responsible - give yourself some credit. Users who report the so-called 'loss of magic' tend to be regular users (once a week) and often consume just as much, if not more, than you did on just one night. Give it some time, take your standard dose and i'm sure it will be just as magical as before.
 
Cheers for the advice mate. In regards to "usual dose", since I'm not really a fan of re-dosing as I know it increases neurotoxcity and whatnot, I'm thinking of dropping one 200mg partyflock next time, and leaving it at that. Problem is, I get the feeling I shouldn't be taking that much to begin with (as 200mg is an awful lot of MDMA).

Another think to add, I found that on my last re-dose, I experienced about 2 seconds of a tight chest and breathing coupled with a really increased heart-rate. I thought I was going to pass-out, but thankfully it passed (I think this was due to the heat in the club and need for water). Needless to say, it put me off doing such a dose again. Comedown was pretty easy though, thank God :)
 
Lolololololololo

Fuck I'm getting tired of this magic bs!

Merica and the magic bus, merica and the magic bomb, merica and the magic happy pill. Y'all need to watch dynamo and see its just slight of hand and not actually magic, children.
 
Honestly, I think loosening the magic is a lot better of a term than losing it haha. It's never really gone, it just becomes hard to find when you abuse the drug.

Just take a break and start using the drug more responsibly.. all things will go back to how they should be.
 
SilentRoller said:
Cheers for the advice mate. In regards to "usual dose", since I'm not really a fan of re-dosing as I know it increases neurotoxcity and whatnot, I'm thinking of dropping one 200mg partyflock next time, and leaving it at that. Problem is, I get the feeling I shouldn't be taking that much to begin with (as 200mg is an awful lot of MDMA).

Another think to add, I found that on my last re-dose, I experienced about 2 seconds of a tight chest and breathing coupled with a really increased heart-rate. I thought I was going to pass-out, but thankfully it passed (I think this was due to the heat in the club and need for water). Needless to say, it put me off doing such a dose again. Comedown was pretty easy though, thank God :)
Click to expand...

No worries. If the reason you're taking 200mg at once is because you want the experience to last a long time, without re-dosing, then i'm quite sure that doesn't work. Your first dose of MDMA, providing it is adequate to cause a significant serotonin release, will usually determine the intensity but the duration is often quite similar. For example, if you dropped 120mg it would last a similar duration to 200mg, but feel less intense. I'm unsure whether dropping 120mg, then 40mg at T+1hour would be more damaging than dropping just 200mg all at once. The term 'neurotoxic' is thrown around quite loosely. If you read the literature, MDMA doesn't become significantly neurotoxic until high mg/kg (usually toward 5mg/kg). So, your one night consuming 400mg might have caused some damage (assuming you're an average weight of 70-80kg), but of course your brain can repair itself. Its only when consuming high doses becomes regular do people typically experience severe adverse effects or a 'loss of magic' from MDMA. My personal opinion as to why it is overhyped is down to the illicit drugs market. Users can never really determine what they're taking, the education about drug-use is not there & the prevalence of piperazines. I remember Futura (where is that guy?) used to post some interesting stuff about how pipes & MDMA could result in a deadly combo due to enzyme inhibition. Less educated users could consume a pill, feel MDMA-like effects from the cocktail of MDMA/Piperazine, experience a long-term comedown & instantly blame MDMA as that is what it was sold to them as. For this I blame the shockingly poor 'war on drugs.'

Sorry for going somewhat offtopic.
 
You have raised some good points here. In regards to redosing, I think it was Shulgin who mentioned that if you drop half/one third the original dose at T+1:00/1:30, you extend your peak by an extra hour or so. I found this to be true in that respect, although I can't really say that the experience lasted that much longer, since I was so mashed, I lost all track of time.

My question is here: I'm curious as to how "neurotoxic"/stupid dropping one party flock as my usual dose would be. I have tried sticking to halves, but I always end up doing the other half at some point, as I feel that If I'm going to have a roll for which I have to wait over a month for, I might as well have a great one. Obviously, I would never, ever advocate doing this any more frequently that once a month absolute maximum, and I will never redose like I did again. I feel that MDMA is truly something incredible, and whilst it is hard to not imagine and look forward to when your next experience will be, I feel that my patience and self control will be worth it in the long run (providing me dropping a party flock pill as a usual dose doesn't kill the magic first)
 
Think I remember hearing this advice from Folley somewhere;

If you go too hard one night/weekend, just take a slightly longer break (one that you feel would be the most beneficial considering you know yourself the best) than usual.

No magic shall be lost =D
 
You'll be fine! The guilt is probably just compounded from your comedown.

Take a break, be healthy, and next time don't go too hard :)
 
There is just NO WAY you've lost the magic

you did 400mgs yes, I did more than that my very first roll.. I was seeing stuff that wasnt there... my next roll 6-8 weeks later was awesome.

I ate 300mg through one night and DID IT AGAIN the next night.. it still worked but not the same.. its all about that serotonin wich takes about 90 days to fully recover.. maybe even a little bit more.

The magic is in YOU and not in the drug itself, remember that

you are just freaking out about losing the magic... If you rolled a few days ago it might be due to lack of serotonin, wich could lead to more destructive thoughts.. thats just a theory thouugh. I came to that theory because I always feel super awesome when I roll... but if I do too much I might feel sad and be freaking out about that magic myself after a few days when my serotonin is proven by science to be low. Just calm down, drink some tea, smoke a joint, watch a movie.. if you wait long enough your next roll will be awesome
 
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laugh said:
Lolololololololo

Fuck I'm getting tired of this magic bs!

Merica and the magic bus, merica and the magic bomb, merica and the magic happy pill. Y'all need to watch dynamo and see its just slight of hand and not actually magic, children.
Click to expand...

I agree.

Fuck the Magic.

#fuckthemagicMDMA4LIF3
 
i havnt lost the magic i just cant reach it cause i have developed a tolerance.

if i didnt have a tolerance i would again have my magic powers.

:|
 
laugh said:
Lolololololololo

Fuck I'm getting tired of this magic bs!

Merica and the magic bus, merica and the magic bomb, merica and the magic happy pill. Y'all need to watch dynamo and see its just slight of hand and not actually magic, children.
Click to expand...

You seem to have a problem differentiating between litteral speech and figurative speech. If I used the expression "out of this world" does that actually mean that something was transported from outer-space to you? No one thinks it is literal magic. It's a figure of speech. If i say i am getting high it does not mean my feet are lifting off of the ground after i smoke a joint, if i say i am going to drop a pill it doesn't mean i'm going to put it on floor and if I roll off of said pill it doesn't mean that i am rolling around on the floor. :)


To the OP. If you feel that you are losing the magic then take a break for a while. I built a huge tolerance many years ago and after a year off i felt like it was close to my first time again.
 
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i know that and you know that but im not sure all these other kids know that.

thanks for the lesson though mate not sure where i would be without you :)

images
 
laugh said:
i know that and you know that but im not sure all these other kids know that.

Thanks for the lesson though mate not sure where i would be without you :)

images
Click to expand...


oooh a shiny trophy

/hugs
 
I took pills every weekend between 1992 & 1995 sometimes during the week as well 8o

I had some MDMA recently & "The Magic" ( I detest that phrase ) was firmly intact
 
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