baby faces... are they bad?

[MyDoorsAreOpen]

I'm about to turn 34, thin and baby-faced, and I regularly get mistaken for a dude in his mid 20s. With the right make up and costumes, I'm quite sure I could believably play a high school guy on stage/screen. A baby face may be a disadvantage when you're barely over the threshold of adulthood, but once you're in the thick of it, it's the gift that keeps on giving. Trust me on this.

I used to get really sore about bigger and less baby-faced dudes prejudging me as easy to kick around, or who preemptively make the assumption I should defer to them because they could kick my ass. It still happens sometimes. But now I just calmly write the person off as a jerk, who isn't worth one iota of anything I've got to give. Anybody who calls me "boss" or "chief" or "big guy" the first time they meet me is starting off on my bad side. If another dude, especially a stranger, talks down to me just because I look smaller and younger, I usually go out of my way to show in my tone of voice and body language that I'm not bowing down to them as the alpha dog. Usually that's all it takes for that kind of treatment to stop. But keep in mind I don't run in any alcohol-soaked circles full of dudes with something to prove.

The issue is not that having a baby face or young appearance is inherently a problem. The issue is that some people just like to dominate, and will use any available discrepancy between themselves and you as an excuse to feel above you. You just have to show, usually nonverbally, that you're onto them and you're not playing into their game.

 

[StrutterGear]

I don't look anywhere close to 21, I've been accused of being nearer 30 before ! But mostly around 25. I think age wears better on men; I wouldnt want my missus looking like a 40 year old before her time.

 

[Pagey]

^Definitely - I think men are at their best in their mid-30s but for women it's more mid-20s. In my opinion anyway

 

[StrutterGear]

^Definitely - I think men are at their best in their mid-30s but for women it's more mid-20s. In my opinion anyway

Men are the only ones who can pull off the silver fox look as well I'm 21 in a couple weeks but I've got grey coming through quite badly already (cheers for the shit genes, dad).

 

[Pagey]

Men are the only ones who can pull off the silver fox look as well I'm 21 in a couple weeks but I've got grey coming through quite badly already (cheers for the shit genes, dad).

Haha, I've got a friend who's just turning 20 and is already starting to lose his hair, poor guy. Don't worry, as you said the silver fox look can be super sexy

 

[Serotonin101]

Haha, I've got a friend who's just turning 20 and is already starting to lose his hair, poor guy. Don't worry, as you said the silver fox look can be super sexy

my dad rocks the salt n pepper look and has good thick hair. I look forward to aging as I've seen how I look with some silver back when I was younger (experimenting with hair dye after it washed out left me with silver hair). my whole family looks young on my dads side (orientals age pretty well for some reason).

 

[kytnism]

^Definitely - I think men are at their best in their mid-30s but for women it's more mid-20s. In my opinion anyway

according to social research that was recently widespread in the media; women physically; apparently look their best at 31.

...kytnism...

 

[Pagey]

Interesting article. I kinda wonder how they conduct that sort of research though.

 

[tackyspiral]

I'm the opposite. I'm young with an older appearance. It comes in handy, but one major disadvantage is that people assume you can handle more than you really can, and you get given more responsibility to deal with.

At least when you're baby faced people assume you are innocent. You can get away with way more.

so true my "innocent" appearance i think can be credited with me getting away with a whole lot more!!!! even when i was in full junkie mode i still looked like an innocent lil blonde .... very helpful when you encounter police.... hence my clean record

 

[StrutterGear]

Interesting article. I kinda wonder how they conduct that sort of research though.

Lads magazine survey

 

[Serotonin101]

so true my "innocent" appearance i think can be credited with me getting away with a whole lot more!!!! even when i was in full junkie mode i still looked like an innocent lil blonde .... very helpful when you encounter police.... hence my clean record

females in general seem to get away with things moreso than guys. sad but true.

 

[RedRum OG]

I have a friend too who is 21 and balding, like really bad widows peak and the big circular spot in the middle/top/back

And then there's me, I don't have a single hair on the sides of my face, weigh 130, definitely young-sounding voice and babyfaced.

So I guess I should consider myself lucky seeing as we're the same age. Though I never feel this way in general... Especially with girls. Girls always like guys that are older than themselves, so unless I wanna fuck around with 18y.o.s (I don't) I'm kind of screwed. Had a 2 yr relationship with a girl 1 year younger and it was horrible how much of a difference in maturity there was

Plus I've been told many many times I have "an old soul" and am much more mature than people my age, so I am much more attracted to girls older than myself, so sort of double screwed. Being a junkie for a few years and almost having a kid makes you grow up quick

 

[thahighlife]

thank you everyone for the responses. its good to hear i realy am taking it over the top.

i just remember maybe the most humiliating experience of my life. it was my 21st birrthday and we went to a really nice strip club i was dressed SO nice i had the birthday glow i felt so good inside i was "swagged" out if you will. i was with my best friends and literally was feeling so good about myself (no it wasnt because of the strippers lol)

the guy on the loud speaker looks at me and goes "hey guy up front youre fired for letting 15 year olds in! whats going on in here!" for everyone to hear. i swear that ruined my entire night my entire body got so hot i turned red and i stayed for a bit but i wasnt enjoying myself. i ended up just leaving 20 minutes after i just felt like everyone was looking at me after that. it was really fucked up.

its that kind of stuff that makes me question it because he had no reason to just call me out like that

 

[Lysis]

Haha at everyone under 25 saying they get carded and attributing it to having a baby face. You're supposed to card people who look under 30 to be safe and of course there are those states that mandate everyone gets carded.

When you're 35+ and still get carded then that's something but being 25 and getting carded is normal.

 

[TrYpTiCaL]

I am forty and if I cut my hair short and shave I still get carded. If I don't my age shows some as I've had quite a bit of grey hair since I was 20 or 21.

 

[Pagey]

thank you everyone for the responses. its good to hear i realy am taking it over the top.

i just remember maybe the most humiliating experience of my life. it was my 21st birrthday and we went to a really nice strip club i was dressed SO nice i had the birthday glow i felt so good inside i was "swagged" out if you will. i was with my best friends and literally was feeling so good about myself (no it wasnt because of the strippers lol)

the guy on the loud speaker looks at me and goes "hey guy up front youre fired for letting 15 year olds in! whats going on in here!" for everyone to hear. i swear that ruined my entire night my entire body got so hot i turned red and i stayed for a bit but i wasnt enjoying myself. i ended up just leaving 20 minutes after i just felt like everyone was looking at me after that. it was really fucked up.

its that kind of stuff that makes me question it because he had no reason to just call me out like that

That really suck, what a prick for saying that on the speaker. Don't let it affect you though. Most people would be jerks enough to say it like that and in the end it doesn't really matter if they think you're younger or not.

 

[pofacedhoe]

for me the person is the face.

a beautiful face will stick in my heart more than any muscle chest.

let that bad experience slide...

that guy was an ass

what you have to do is believe in yourself and have a little faith and love

 

[llama112]

In my "intro to psych" course at university, I remember we were looking at images of men. The majority of people (I'd say about 80-85%) were attracted to the male with the more "baby face". Really. Apparently it is just instinct for most females. I wish I had the sources or the study or something to back up my info, but I just remember that. Not saying that older faces are unattractive ... just that more females prefer looking at a male with a younger looking face.

 

[KoreyS]

I have been told I have a baby face. I have also been told I have a very ugly face. I also had one guy guess that I was 37 when I was really 19. I also have acne and I'm 25.

 

[pofacedhoe]

I have been told I have a baby face. I have also been told I have a very ugly face. I also had one guy guess that I was 37 when I was really 19. I also have acne and I'm 25.

so lots of contradicting reports there