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Gibberings CXV - Documented proof

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farmaz said:
this is the first time I been around a kid full time like this & it's a real shock to the system tbh. I am child like in my ways even at my age but to be kicked then expected to forget it right away is not going to happen.
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Kids don't have the ability to rationalise the situation and place context on it, but you do.

Behaving in a childlike manner is a choice for you, it's not for the child.

Children kick for a reason, be that for the attention of an adult because they need stimulation (attention usually comes from adult attention), or attention from other stimulating things like other children or toys (altho even toys take a joint effort between adult and child to be stimulating more often than not)

Children in general take up a lot of adult time and attention, and when they're not getting it, they'll behave in a way that's clear that they want it. They want it for a very legitimate, justified and human reasons too. It's an adult's job to give it to them.

They'll never understand your point of view and they will very rarely be able to empathise with your needs at all, be that your need for soltude or quiet (hence babysitters are always handy). To expect them to understand an adults needs is futile, and to expect them to give you peace and quiet when you desire it equally so. Kids are a full time job, and anyone responsible for them has to acknowledge that they're fully responsible for providing them with a 24/7 entertainment and example centre

I'm never having kids. EVER. If I'm not prepared to make a good job of it, I'm not going to do it.

In other news, I think kids are pretty awesome critters <3 ... their enquiring minds are beautiful, and they're highly rewarding and entertaining in moderation.

Good luck with it all tho <3
 
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^Whaat why wououdlnt you? I'd love a son (or daughter), i know its every parents dreams but i could make it like me, minus the flaws. So the perfect being!.. in theroy, in practise it would be so so hard and so much responsibility, but so worth it
 
@Marmalade


I am not even going to read your post as I don't care for your opinion.
you made yourself 100% clear a few days ago your view on me, so please stick me on ignore as we will never ever have anything to say to each other.

EDIT - I have taken the bull by the horns, your posts are now on ignore
 
farmaz said:
I have been clean for a while but still have the "heroin ghosts" in my soul, tbh I don't think they will ever leave me but I am NOT shooting up in my womans bathroom etc.

I like the kid & treat her right, I was adopted right away & had a really shit life which I wont go into in here but I will say I had 3 stepmoms & 1 stepdad, I been "roughed up" shall we call it by all of them & had a very rough life so I know how it fels to be kicked around.

I would NEVER, EVER wish that feeling upon the kid, I promise you that 1, may God strike me down dead if I lie but I find it hard to deal with a kid that says she loves me then kicks me & tells me to "go back to England as me & mommy don't like you"

I will be honest here & I know alot of EADD members will rip me for this but when the kid said that it hurt me in my very soul tbh :(
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I don't think anyone will rip u mate for saying that it hurt u in yr soul when the kid said what she did, I'd feel exactly the same way mate.
She doesn't mean it, she is probably finding it as hard as you are having other people around. She might even think you are trying to take her mum away from her.
 
farmaz said:
I have been clean for a while but still have the "heroin ghosts" in my soul, tbh I don't think they will ever leave me but I am NOT shooting up in my womans bathroom etc.

I like the kid & treat her right, I was adopted right away & had a really shit life which I wont go into in here but I will say I had 3 stepmoms & 1 stepdad, I been "roughed up" shall we call it by all of them & had a very rough life so I know how it fels to be kicked around.

I would NEVER, EVER wish that feeling upon the kid, I promise you that 1, may God strike me down dead if I lie but I find it hard to deal with a kid that says she loves me then kicks me & tells me to "go back to England as me & mommy don't like you"

I will be honest here & I know alot of EADD members will rip me for this but when the kid said that it hurt me in my very soul tbh :(
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this brought tears to my eyes to be honest farmaz, very honest of you.

Thats what its all about isn't it, who ever we are, how ever old we are, hurt & fear. And we react by slamming barriers up when what we need to do is be honest and humble and communicate. You should get on her level and tell her how it hurt you and made you feel sad when she said that and thats why you were in a bad mood. End on a hug. Its not easy, especially after years of heroin use but you sound like you want to try, and with enough love anything's possible.
 
farmaz said:
@Marmalade


I am not even going to read your post as I don't care for your opinion.
you made yourself 100% clear a few days ago your view on me, so please stick me on ignore as we will never ever have anything to say to each other.

EDIT - I have taken the bull by the horns, your posts are now on ignore
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I'm crying rainbow unicorn tears.

You're way too sensitive and offended way too easily. You're not very tenacious. Grow a thicker skin and learn to listen to third party views on your opinions and character. Go on, I dare you <3

[edit] there was no malice in my previous post, it wasn't personal. the views I posted the other day were constructive when compared to things you yourself had written.
 
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A few people on here I see in a new light tbh.

Still got a serious dislike for 2 people on here that I will not name, 1 is clear from my post & another person said he would ignore me but feels the need to read my stuff & even post but thats life I guess.

Thanks to everyone thats posted, I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders tbh.

Tomorrow is a new day I guess, I will try my best with the child.

A huge thanks & I mean it to you lot :)
 
@Farmaz I'm off to bed now mate but just wanted to say that I hope tmrw is a better day for you.
Try and play some games with the little girl and show her you are her friend.
Good luck mate, hope it all goes well for you mate.
 
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