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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

NoBENDER - let's keep it going!

I'm using this month to stop my nail biting habit as well. :) shits hard to do since I always got my "doc" with me and its not illegal :/
 
Count me in. I've been sober for two weeks today, and hope to stay that way for November (and beyond). Let's do this.
 
I'm so happy for all of you. I've vowed to cut down to weed only once a week. I saw this thread and I just flushed my last bowl that I was about to smoke down the toilet.
 
motherofearth said:
Congrats! That, in my book, is the hardest thing to do in life.
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Thank you so very much. I did it again tonight. Next step is to fuck away all of my paraphenalia. It'll definitely occur; its just a matter of getting as far away from my house as possible to do so. I'm going to attend my first NA meeting this Wedensday night so that'll be the night for it.

badfish45 said:
I'm so happy for all of you. I've vowed to cut down to weed only once a week. I saw this thread and I just flushed my last bowl that I was about to smoke down the toilet.
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Congratulations on that one friend - wheither its cutting down or full on abstinance, both are monumental achievements. I used Octsober for cutting down, myself. Chipped here and there - weekend warrior kind of deal. Managed to get up to eight days clean at one point, used for one day. Then another 4 days clean - caved again, but in a big way this time involving a huge bender in which I spent about 80% of my pay cheque...so fuck this, I'm done with handing over 100euros+ a week for this shit. If even the least I can achieve is to double those 8 days of sobriety in 16, I'll be extremely contented with myself.

Ugh...I fucking made it right up to Friday morning without touching a speck of skag...then blew the lot of my cash on it. Broke for the entire week now. FUCK. I know what I'm going to do with the next bit of cash I get though - give my mother and father 50euros each for themselves, because I was too strung out to buy them anything more than a card for their birthdays a few weeks ago, selfish cunt that I was.

Appreciate the encouragement folks.
 
^ last year I saved up $300 for a tattoo machine for my dad but I ran it through my arm :/ I know your pain my friend
 
Hey peeps, I'm in, too. 6th day sober and counting. It's easier now then it was in the first days (which I mostly slept away, I was sooo exhausted), but it's my third "real" relapse since I was in rehab, the third time I managed to quit and the second time without any consequences (the first time cost me a 6-year relationship...) and I notice how my mind starts ticking: If I managed to sober up those times, I will manage it again, so why shouldn't I allow myself to use once in a while!? Slippery slope, really dangerous, and I don't want to take it, but I'm aware I have to make some changes now to take a safer road.
 
Ugh, failure - total annihilation! I drank last night to intoxication. But I passed out before I could get disgracefully drunk so now I don't have a crippling hangover. I'm just gonna have to try harder and respect the process :\:\
 
You can do it MoE :) Try coming back to this thread when you get cravings. I suggest ridding of all your alcohol and if you have a car giving the keys to someone you trust so you arent tempted to buy more. Also use that money you save to buy yourself something nice :)
 
PriestTheyCalledHim said:
Thanks Serotonin101. I'm going away to a friend's birthday party this weekend, and there will be free booze there but I hope to stay sober.
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I didn't drink anything at all this weekend while out with friends and partying. I did however bring my own drinks like seltzer water, green tea, or I'd just drink water. We even went to a bar and I just ordered seltzer water. I just saw it all as a challenge.

I always have at least a stache since I hate shaving my upper lip.
 
PriestTheyCalledHim said:
I didn't drink anything at all this weekend while out with friends and partying. I did however bring my own drinks like seltzer water, green tea, or I'd just drink water. We even went to a bar and I just ordered seltzer water. I just saw it all as a challenge.

I always have at least a stache since I hate shaving my upper lip.
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Shit man, congratulations on that one. An extremely trying fete when within the midst of ones vice of choice. I'm of the opinion that if you can remain to refrain comfortably in the company of people indulging, then you're truely attuned to your will and you've truely succeeded. If the contrary occurs where you cant even talk about it let alone be about another indulging - then it's still got its claws around you, I believe.

Ugh, just dropped a hash hot rock from a joint onto the 'V' my keyboard. Obviously still working though.

VanWeyden said:
why shouldn't I allow myself to use once in a while!? Slippery slope, really dangerous, and I don't want to take it, but I'm aware I have to make some changes now to take a safer road.
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There's no real definitive answer as to why you shouldn't. I'm fairly certain I'll still rock and roll every once in a while - it just boils down to wheither you can without relapsing into addiction again. Everyone participant in Nobender seems to have their particular goals, some are seeking to cut down; some are aspiring for utter abstinance and others (like myself) are trying to rid themselves of an actual physical and/or psychological addiction.

I have no exceeding desire to abstain from the odd smoke of heroin for the rest of my life - but I'm done with staying a slave to it. I dont do any other drugs (tonights joint is to aid in the withdrawal process; such was the case with the 30mgs of Diazepam this afternoon otherwise the hash would have sent me into a paranoid wreck, exacerbating my symptoms up to ten fucking fold). 'The odd smoke' doesnt mean every weekend, nor at all even once a month - more akin to festive holidays, large social/family gatherings or to the theater/the odd gig. Having said this, even that wont occur for quite awhile to come.
 
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Woot!
Keep it up, Pagey!
Still no drugs for me. It's been ages now, ive lost count of days.
But the one thing Im finding severely hard to shake is my filthy weed habit.
 
Well done Pagey, two days more than I achieved last month. Did you come off it cold turkey or with meds?
How are you feeling now by the way? Can you notice much of a difference? I know for me, the longest symptoms are always feeling freezing 24/7 so much so that often times I'd have to sleep in some clothes, and insomnia - the *worst*.

I'm doing it with the aid of a rapid taper with methadone; 60mls over the course of the next six days, so thats 20, 15, 10, 5, 5, 5; forever works a charm. I've done enough CT's to last me several lifetimes over, and another one will just cause a relapse into addiction again so this is the most prudent pursuit for me this time. I have a diazepam script coming to me next Friday to get me back on my feet (to regulate my sleeping pattern, essentially) - but for me, once I dont have heroin in my system I consider myself clean.

With the aid of the the rapid taper and the benzos I'll avoid every symptom apart from feeling a little chilly, in which case I'll just don a hoodie...as soon as next Monday rolls around and I can afford to buy one. Didn't get much of an oppertunity to go clothes shopping over the last couple of years in strungout central.

Very happy with myself so far. Its not easy at all, but it could have been CT 8(
 
tripnotyzm said:
Woot!
Keep it up, Pagey!
Still no drugs for me. It's been ages now, ive lost count of days.
But the one thing Im finding severely hard to shake is my filthy weed habit.
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Thanks! And congrats to you too for getting (almost) entirely clean Trip, that's awesome :) hope you'll manage to do that with the weed as well.

endlessnameless said:
Well done Pagey, two days more than I achieved last month. Did you come off it cold turkey or with meds?
How are you feeling now by the way? Can you notice much of a difference? I know for me, the longest symptoms are always feeling freezing 24/7 so much so that often times I'd have to sleep in some clothes, and insomnia - the *worst*.
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Thank you! I went CT because I didn't want to drag it out so I figured I'd just suck it up and get it over with - I'd done both xanax and oxy CT a while back so I knew what to expect. I'm feeling SO much better now, you have no idea. Was horrible in the first few days (I'd say the worst was probably day 3) but after about a week it started to really calm down and physically, I feel almost back to normal now. Insomnia's still here though, I didn't sleep at all in the first 3-4 days and now I've been doing maybe 1 or 2h a night :( buuut no more fever or vomiting and all that.
I'm happy to hear it's going well for you too. It sounds like your taper is efficient, keep it up I'm sure you can do it!
 
I remember my last detox. went in hella high, lied about my last use, and got a bupe shot. instant precipitated withdrawals. never wanna do that again... January 5th will be one year :). let's keep it going my friends and family. love all of ya.
 
Did you find the withdrawals ended sooner after that bupe shot? I always imagined it would be like sending me into my peak state of withdrawals (ie day three) therefore I'd only have to feel crappy for one, maybe two days.
 
yes and no. it lessened the symptoms after the precip withdrawl wore off. that was my only shot of bupe. then I was sick for about 2.5 weeks more (really bad dope habit, over a gram a day with ~80% purity [performed extraction for pure h from street quality and weighed the difference]). deathly sick for about a week, moderate sickness for another week, lasting lingering withdrawals for another week or so. I got a full nights sleep with meds (seroquel) after about 16 days.
 
oh man things took a turn for the worst for me. I got a new hookup who has very cheap everything. And i've been using etizolam every night; think i'm fucked and going back on the benzo train, hopefully this time it doesn't crash so hard. Still off opiates though but new dealer sure tempts me.
 
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