• The Dark Side 💕 Welcome Guest 💕
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules
    Notable Threads Urgent Hotlines
    Bereavement Mindfulness
    Suicide Support Anger Management
  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

How to make NEW friends?

T

twyleskyles

Ex-Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 10, 2012
Messages
73
Does anyone know where one can go to do this? I am trying to get clean, so far a week clean. I need new friends.
 
AA/NA might be a good place for you to make some new friends. Another thing that might help is this website. You can try new things while meeting new people.
 
i second AA/NA everytime i'm trying to get sober i need that support to help me but i've never staid clean long enough to get to the 12th step
 
Also sports clubs and other places where you can do organized activies (or I dunno, things like painting and stuff) - great way to meet new people who share common interests :)
 
mrflowers00 said:
i second AA/NA everytime i'm trying to get sober i need that support to help me but i've never staid clean long enough to get to the 12th step
Click to expand...

I like to skip ahead to the 13th step ;).

But for real I dont think there is any secret to making friends it will usually just happen. I feel like putting too much effort into meeting friends makes you seem desperate and its a put off to normal people. It also invites in the shady types who will use and abuse you.
 
I've made some very good lifelong friends through AA/NA. We used to go paintballing, bowling, out to eat all the time. You'll have people that just genuinely care. I love the program I really do.
And watch out for that 13th step, stay in the program long enough you'll work that one thoroughly lol.
 
Cutting and pasting from another thread, which I don't normally like to do, you deserve a personal reply twyleskyles but only wrote it this morning and advice stands here just as well:

What do you like to do, or what do you think you'd like to do? There will almost certainly be a social activity to be made from it in some way. Start looking. I took up climbing at an indoor wall. They had a 'partners in climb' thing weds nights for people like me who didn't have anyone to go with. Good exercise for one, none better for lazy exercisers like me, loads of fun, been wanting to take up the climbing for ages and here was a social opportunity to be had from it. Wins all round. My local addiction unit has a social thing for recent ex-addicts needing to fill time with activities with others like themselves away from their circle of still-using friends. See what your local units can offer. There may be something similar running near you? They may also have a need for mentors on a voluntary basis. Put your experiences to positive use with others in a similar boat. That could be very valuable for you going forward yourself ( though perhaps a little more distance is needed just yet for that )?
 
Look in your community for opportunities. Even if you aren't religious, church gatherings are good ways, even just activities going around in your neighborhood and town, they are great ways. I'd suggest concerts but you might find people there who are using, generally a large portion, so I suggest being careful if you decide that :) New friends are great ways to stay clean and occupy your time.

Oh yeah, take classes :)
 
DrinksWithEvil said:
volunteer
Click to expand...

I was about to say this! I met great people volunteering at the shelter. Many struggling to stay clean and just talking and listening to their stories made me feel so much better. They're friends for life, although this past year several passed away. I am forever grateful for the chance to get to know them and friendships I made. One thing you must do is delete every drug connect from your phone or even people you partied with. Cut those ties forever. I wanted to relapse and then remembered there was a reason I deleted them. One day at a time buddy. You can do it! <3
 
I deleted them. I have the numbers memorized though. And I want to call N/A but instead I just keep watching Game Of Thrones, Breaking Bad, Dexter, Mad Men, Curb Your Enthusiasm. I am sober still, still sober today!
 
Be yourself put urself out there. It really is a lot wasier than your mind makes it seem. Ive been there
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top