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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

Back to the dark side

Be careful with trams though. If i remember correctly they lower the seizure threshold. Idk if you have a seizure disorder or not so i thought id throw that info out there.
 
It sounds like something has really shifted in you on a deep level and that must be such a relief. I am struck by how deep and calm your resolve feels. I know that it may not seem that way to you in these early days but it comes through to me.<3
 
herbavore said:
It sounds like something has really shifted in you on a deep level and that must be such a relief. I am struck by how deep and calm your resolve feels. I know that it may not seem that way to you in these early days but it comes through to me.<3
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Thanks, this is encouraging. I also hope this is a turning point. I will be tested again the day after tomorrow when I doc I've been referred to has been given a list of my medications and oxycontin is on there, he'll no doubt assume I will want a repeat as most of my meds are due for a repeat. I'm planning to say I'd prefer tramadol - but a little part of me thinks an oxy script stored on the pharmacy's system might come in handy when writing exams in a few weeks. But then I remember that saying about doing the same thing and expecting different results is insanity.
 
^ and allowing access for "exams" is just a reservation. The trams themselves provide somewhat of a stimulating effect (SNRI if i remember correctly?) so they may help on their own. Best of luck to you my friend.
 
Serotonin101 said:
^ and allowing access for "exams" is just a reservation. The trams themselves provide somewhat of a stimulating effect (SNRI if i remember correctly?) so they may help on their own. Best of luck to you my friend.
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Yeah, it's like I'm not sure I want to close the door on it for good by saying no more to the second doc on the "team". It is a reservation, you're right.
 
Its not the kind with casinos either. Though which ever reservation you enter into, you will enter with high expectations thinking you can handle it, then shortly after you will leave, depressed broken and regretting you ever stepped foot in it.
 
"relapsed"... Thanks for the wasted support. Just kept convincing myself I couldn't study intensively without it, so went and got a new script outside of my pain/support "team" for 60 oc's. Anyway at least a set a personal best of 6 days without oxycodone lololol :/.

Seeing my shrink tomorrow, will see where I go from there... But I cannot afford to miss/do badly in these exams.
 
It can never be "wasted". The support is for you as you create your process; and that process may not be one smooth trajectory but a series of halting steps. Both the goal and the direction are the same so just focus on that and keep going. While I am sorry that you convinced yourself that you couldn't do the exams without your script, I can understand that the worry was a real one and just the worry itself could have sabotaged your ability. Good luck and don't feel bad. Sometimes it is so hard to see the progress we are actually making inside--you have to trust it is there.<3
 
Treat it like people do with quittinf smoking. Pick a time when you arent so stressed and wont be as tempted to use. Might work better than trying to quit during exams.
 
My pain guy tricked me into seeing an addiction specialist psychiatrist today (or I totally misread the referral), and I sat through 2 hours of gruelling questions, where I was selectively honest, anyway I managed to walk out without a label and a script for an oxy alternative.
 
My rheumatologist took the time to phone all my (remaining) oxy sources and tell them not to give me oxy. I haven't taken any since wednes I'm now on tramadol and codeine. Went to a doc today for oxy and was subsequently "bounced" that's why I know about my rheumatologist.

I'd like to kick all opiates like my rheumatologist wants but I just feel like the hook is soooooo deep, I mean I've been taking them for a better part of a decade.
 
Might wanna try for bupe. I know theres temgesic for chronic pain and you can taper with it. Bupe actually provides decent pain relief too though many people dont recognize it. Also virtually no euphoria since you got a tolerance.
 
Serotonin101 said:
Might wanna try for bupe. I know theres temgesic for chronic pain and you can taper with it. Bupe actually provides decent pain relief too though many people dont recognize it. Also virtually no euphoria since you got a tolerance.
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Yeah just started that in the form of suboxone 8 mg today. Feels alright. Still not sure whether I wanna try taper down with the on oxy or taper down with bupe - I have the choice.
 
Nah, don't think my habit was severe enough to warrant it. Tramadol and codeine will be easier to get off eventually - heard getting off bupe is a bitch.
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yeah, should totally not be debating on trying heroin for the first time.
 
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