In My Hand

beengerman

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 13, 2010
Messages
206
Location
New England
I lost the girlfriend because i saved another girl i used to talk to from an OD,

BUT the point is I'm 4 months clean and i had bags in my hand,

and i didn't do it. I didn't fucking give in. Its the next day now and i am just so damn proud of myself.

I don't even have any words.
 
Yeah I bet. Just wanted to add - thanks for sharing, it's pretty inspiring for anyone else in recovery such as myself.
 
exactly. you have to have people to look up to. i don't know anyone who beat this thing or even have years clean. the girl that i posted about before was 18 months clean. i looked up to that, but she slipped. i have to to just be proud of myself now. pm me if you ever want to talk. getting clean is so much easier with a buddy. could use you too. be good.
 
Its good that you didnt use but:

You should not be around anyone who is still using. Stay away from wet faces and wet places ecspecially so new into recovery.

This situation could have ended up bad. Cut anyone out of your life whos using if you wanna stay clean.
 
The girl i was clean for a year and a half, it was her first relapse , hence why she almost overdosed. you completely right about not hanging out with users. but she was clean.
 
This is a great accomplishment. I myself have gone through similar stuff in the past 6-9 months i've been clean from illicit drugs (i'm on a small dose of suboxone and could in theory raid a cabinet in my house for vicodin, so i know what you've went through). Just dont become content being in this position. Its one thing to have bags in your hand a few times and say no, its quite another thing to 'regularly be in this position' and say no every time.

My point is, dont make it a habit (again). Yes you CAN say no now, but: will you say no every time out of a 100 times? You know that the best way to avoid them is to prevent the situation from happening to begin with, i'm sure that was part of how you stayed clean the past 4 months.

Keep doing what youre doing; stay confident, but don't become OVERCONFIDENT thinking "oh i can see dope all the time, i can hang with these people again!" or "Oh i can start SLINGING now because I can say no!" Avoid the situations entirely as much as humanly possible just like you have been. That vicodin i mentioned earlier? I told my family i knew where it was and to get rid of it. That way the temptation isn't there every single day; because i know if i have a 'bad day' its entirely possible i'd cave. I have 0 intentions to, and i've had bad days and not, but the right circumstances its a definite possibility for me personally.

Don't get it twisted I'm not saying you were planning on doing either of these things, nor accusing you of thinking it. I'm just putting the info out there for your benefit. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, ya know?

And once again: good for you! It's not the easiest thing in the world to do the right thing, but you did it.
 
Last edited:
That's hugely inspirational. To me and lots of others. Thanks for posting you have a lot to be proud of!
 
This is a great accomplishment. I myself have gone through similar stuff in the past 6-9 months i've been clean from illicit drugs (i'm on a small dose of suboxone and could in theory raid a cabinet in my house for vicodin, so i know what you've went through). Just dont become content being in this position. Its one thing to have bags in your hand a few times and say no, its quite another thing to 'regularly be in this position' and say no every time.

My point is, dont make it a habit (again). Yes you CAN say no now, but: will you say no every time out of a 100 times? You know that the best way to avoid them is to prevent the situation from happening to begin with, i'm sure that was part of how you stayed clean the past 4 months.

Keep doing what youre doing; stay confident, but don't become OVERCONFIDENT thinking "oh i can see dope all the time, i can hang with these people again!" or "Oh i can start SLINGING now because I can say no!" Avoid the situations entirely as much as humanly possible just like you have been. That vicodin i mentioned earlier? I told my family i knew where it was and to get rid of it. That way the temptation isn't there every single day; because i know if i have a 'bad day' its entirely possible i'd cave. I have 0 intentions to, and i've had bad days and not, but the right circumstances its a definite possibility for me personally.

Don't get it twisted I'm not saying you were planning on doing either of these things, nor accusing you of thinking it. I'm just putting the info out there for your benefit. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, ya know?

And once again: good for you! It's not the easiest thing in the world to do the right thing, but you did it.

Everything you said is spot on. i avoid people like that like the plague. and all you guys that responded, fucking thank you. thank you for really knowing what is it to do that. you tell someone that has no experience with anything and there like " cool. good job man." but no, you guys know whats up and i truly appreciate it. thanks again.
 
I know others have said it, but congratulations!! That is such an accomplishment. I'm proud of you.
 
You could have easily relapsed with that stuff in your hand. Glad you didn't. Why did you and your gf break up over this?
What did you do with the bags?
 
She had Trust issues with me and the other girl. I still feel like I did the Right thing. a life is worth more then anything. I could explain more when I'm not on a phone
 
Top