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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

How Are You In One Word v. I got a feelin'

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Sepher said:
Hard work innit Seyer? Took me weeks to pack up the old house, most of it the ex's. Moved my shit to my my new house in a day, mostly sorted within the week but still, exhausting job, stressful and mentally draining on top of the physical humping. Hope all goes smoothly and you enjoy the new place Seyer. Good having the excitement of a new place you can look forward to settling into, eh? :)
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Yeah, its a really good feeling. We got basically everything in today. Tomorrow is just our clothes, toiletries, daily items, etc. The location is great. 5min walk to my daytime classes and 25min walk to my evening classes. Gonna be getting a bike within the next few weeks so thats gonna be good. Theres also an indoor/outdoor swimming hall nearby so Im definitely gonna be swimming a lot. I also eventually want to start hitting the gym and get into decent physical shape.
 
Having a hard day, Depression is in full swing. My brother and his wife are visiting my parents so I am by there also - it's tough to see everyone so succesful and happy when I'm trying my hardest and it feels like I'm getting no where due to how slow it takes. I'm trying not to isolate but here I am on my laptop so ya just very depressed and having trouble talking about it in any depth.
 
theartofwar said:
Having a hard day, Depression is in full swing. My brother and his wife are visiting my parents so I am by there also - it's tough to see everyone so succesful and happy when I'm trying my hardest and it feels like I'm getting no where due to how slow it takes. I'm trying not to isolate but here I am on my laptop so ya just very depressed and having trouble talking about it in any depth.
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Dude, don't try to compare where you are with where other people are. It's meaningless and completely pointless. Totally irrelevant. The only comparison you can make that's in any way meaningful is where you are today compared to where you were last week, last month, 6 months ago. You might be up and down and having a bad day but so long as you can say things have generally taken a turn for the better over recent weeks / months you're winning mate. Just hang in there, try and find the positives, give yourself some time to properly adjust without dwelling too much on the negatives as much as you're able in the meantime.
 
Exhausted.

I was quite productive today, still got some hours to go... working out was harder on me than I would have though.
 
Right on Sepher, I appreciate that bro. My family all has PHDs from harvard, I got expelled from college @ 20 , lot of pressure when everyone is under one roof asking you what your plans are to get your life successful. I tell them truth now, today I'm just making sure I don't use and I'm working on some personal emotional areas. It may not seem like shit to them but it's gonna save my life and eventually I will find what works well for me, when I'm not so close to a life of addiction and crime.
 
I can't decide between sad, angry or hurt...so I'll go with globally depressed. My ex decided to start yelling at me on skype and telling me how happy he is to be rid of me and what a horrible person I am & I ended up relapsing on oxy which is making me feel horrible about myself :(
 
Pagey said:
I can't decide between sad, angry or hurt...so I'll go with globally depressed. My ex decided to start yelling at me on skype and telling me how happy he is to be rid of me and what a horrible person I am & I ended up relapsing on oxy which is making me feel horrible about myself :(
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don't feel bad about yourself pagey just pick yourself back up <3 you were only doing what your mind is used to, and you're still healing your mind, but just remember where drugs lead you. But please, negative emotions like that are what lead back to even further drug use. Don't be concerned with what your ex has to say, it isn't important because it only hurts you.
 
badfish45 said:
don't feel bad about yourself pagey just pick yourself back up <3 you were only doing what your mind is used to, and you're still healing your mind, but just remember where drugs lead you. But please, negative emotions like that are what lead back to even further drug use. Don't be concerned with what your ex has to say, it isn't important because it only hurts you.
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Thank you <3 as soon as I sobered up I got really mad with myself and flushed the remainder of my pills down the toilet, before sending him a message with a piece of my mind and deleting him from my contacts...so that made me feel better I guess. I'm going to see my therapist tomorrow and I've decided to tell her everything about..that thread I started. I've really set my mind to it and hopefully I'll be able to carry through and it'll be liberating.

n3ophy7e said:
Love and hugs to Pagey, I hope you're okay hun <3


I am feeling down :|
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Right back at you <3
 
still in shock

about how sick i was

over all the pain

my families denial

that i am alive still

that it could happen again???

about the hospital here, and the way they treat their patients

i am alive still
 
Depressed.

Everything about this state makes me fucking hate it. I hate that it's the smallest state in the US, I hate that everyone knows each others business, I hate how I've lost all my friends, I hate how there's not many new people to meet that won't "know" me through someone or know someone I know....and I had a seizure in my sleep last night for the 2nd time so I feel fucking zapped and drained as fuck.
 
Hey n30 & Pagey, I really feel for you both! Relapsing is bad, but feeling guilty about it is even more counterproductive than the relapse itself. Wish you heaps of strength to pick yourself up again!

PiP, hope you're feeling better! I don't know any details, but I'm with you in my thoughts!

hthr, As for me, I couldn't live in such an environment. I'm not a misanthrope at all, but I don't want to miss the anonymity of a bigger city... Have you considered moving to another state?

For me, Weltschmerz again.
 
As soon as I finish school, I'm moving more than halfway across the country for grad school to start a new life I can call my own. All my family is currently where I live, since I've grown up here, so I can't wait for the change. I put my applications in in January :)
 
started on Paxil, give you a pretty good clue to how I feel. Been getting more and more depressed but doing everything I can to keep my life stable , and not to isolate myself which are big signs of relapse for me.
 
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