Night terrors?

[Eyes On the Roll]

Hey guys, I don't share a lot of things about myself to people I know in life, and this is one of them, and I feel okay doing this in anonymity over a forum with like minded people. Ever since I was a kid, I have had sporadic episodes where I would suddenly wake up in the night on full alert, and in a full state of complete mental terror. I would be so terrified that not one single thought would process through my mind, and I'd so confused. I would get out of bed almost immediately and pace around the house in shear and utter terror, not able to think. The fear and terror I've felt during these episodes was so incredible, and almost impossible because I've never felt close to that much fear in real life. I can't even begin to explain how I wouldn't be able to mentally process ANYTHING during these times, I honestly couldn't think or reason at all. And as soon as it happened, I'd pass out and fall right back to sleep once I finished my lap around the house and found my way back to my bed. I'm not sure exactly what night terrors are, but to my understanding they involve hallucinations. I have never hallucinated, not on purpose that is. I think that what I have experienced may have been a severe panic attack, due to some suppressed thoughts or issues that I don't want to deal with, and all my panic builds and culminates and bursts out during my sleep.

I have wet the bed every night until age 13, but these terror episodes are very sporadic, they may not happen for months, years even. I had one last night out of the blue, after 2 years (?) of not having one. I've done research about this since I was a teenager and have not been able to piece together exactly what has been happening. Pretty sure I don't have a brain tumor or anything, cause I've had a few brain MRI's while growing up (my last being in November) due to unordinary and inhuman behavior. Has anyone else experienced something like this? Or knows anything about these symptoms? I've tried to place together the relativeness of the episode to the situations in my life, but there is honestly no correlation to anything whatsoever.

 

[Beat It]

Hey Eyes On the Roll,
I've got some experience that I hope might be helpful. Ever since I was a kid, I have suffered from various sleep disorders. The primary two, are sleep walking and sleep paralysis but I have suffered from night terrors on a few occasions as well. Think about what time in your life they started and what might have caused them. Sometimes, they are the result of repressed emotions, or memories. I know my sleep disorders started after a traumatic experience I had as a kid. One thing you can try is make a journal that includes when these terror's started and try to think what could have triggered them in the first place. Also, try to think what factors may be triggering them today. Are you on any drugs, are there specific stressful things that happen in these dreams? Try to record as much information as you can in hopes of finding out what is triggering these episodes. Think content of the dreams, foods, drugs, life factors, etc. I know you say there's no correlation but I bet if you probe enough you'll find something. For me, scary movie's causes nightmares even if I don't find the movie scary. It just triggers something in my subconscious.

I tried taking ambien for my sleeping issues but they only made the sleepwalking worse because I would black out and just keep taking more. I woke up one morning and found out that I had taken 5 extra pills with no recollection of taking them. Took a shower in my clothes one time too. Lol

 

[Eyes On the Roll]

The thing about this is that these episodes are life, reality, not dreams. What's scary is, I was talking to my dad and he said that on a camping trip I suddenly awoke and tried to wrestle him when I was like 12, and I have absolutely no memory of this. You dream every night, but you don't remember every one of them. I've been looking up night terrors, and many cases have no recollection. What's disturbing is that I've begun to think that I have had more episodes than I remember, maybe I haven't remembered some. And yes, sleep paralysis, I had that chronically throughout highschool, but weirdly enough I haven't experienced sleep paralysis since I graduated. Maybe that's because I was going through school and working 25 hours a week and getting 6 hours of sleep per night and was also partying heavily at the time? At the moment I am only working about 25 hours a week at a menial summer job, waiting for fall semester. I don't understand what would cause this because I'm not going through much stress as of now. Actually, my P.O. threatened to violate me 2 weeks ago for not filling up enough job applications, I honestly believe he enjoys the suffering of others, and i say this with full honesty because i can understand. At the moment I am only stressed about my probation officer, because I'm worried he is like myself and would enjoy seeing the suffering of a young upper middle classed kid going through state probation. I am also completely sober from illicit drugs, but I do drink about 4 nights a week, but that is not unusual.

When I was 4 my parents did go through a divorce, and because of that my mother was hospitalized for bipolar disorder and underwent ECT. I vividly remember, at such a young age, waking up from sleep and approaching my father in the living room just balling my eyes out at age 4, because I was unable to see my mom, and was confused as to why this had all happened and had no understanding as to why this happened. Ever since then I have had these sporadic episodes and I have been unable to emotionally attach to another human being.

 

[Beat It]

Hmmm, what are the dreams normally about? I know my sleep paralysis was caused partly by stress, and partly because I was taking too much Ambien. The last week I was on Ambien, I would hear voices loudly with in sleep paralysis, it was so scary! Thankfully when I got off the Ambien I stopped having problems. All benzo's contribute to my sleeping disorders, its weird. I can't take them regularly.

Well it sounds like you know when your sleep terrors started... that's a really good first step. Keep thinking about it and see if your parents can tell you a bit about what was going on at that time. It very well could have been a small incident that just built over time. Also, are you staying healthy physically? Definetly helps me sleep well if I stay healthy.

 

[Beat It]

Oh yeah I'm on probation too. I'm always tossing and turning thinking about that shit. They love to watch us stress out!!

 

[paranoid android]

Ive had night terrors or whatever you'd call them on and off all my life. One common one is where i think i am awake but i can't move at all no matter how hard i try. In these dreams i feel like there is something in the room that is very scary and it's just out of my field of vision. The terror mounts and mounts until you wake up . Certain things have helped me such as smoking a joint before i go to bed but that could make it 100 times worse for you so i can't recommend it.

 

[Misfit Chick]

Ive had night terrors or whatever you'd call them on and off all my life. One common one is where i think i am awake but i can't move at all no matter how hard i try. In these dreams i feel like there is something in the room that is very scary and it's just out of my field of vision. The terror mounts and mounts until you wake up . Certain things have helped me such as smoking a joint before i go to bed but that could make it 100 times worse for you so i can't recommend it.

that shit is not night terror.....i was fully diagnosed with night terror as a child.....which most cases, you grow out of it.....in my 30s i started having what you describe, the paralysis, you think u are awake, you cant talk or move, this shit is a whole other ball game, and some actually believe they are OBE. (out of body experience) ...im pretty sure there is a medical explanation as well, i just dont have the time to go in details about it, if your interested you can research the shit yourself.....im an out of box thinker, and i like the OBE therory..