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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

Parents Coming Down on me like a tonne of bricks for my LSD use

Treacle said:
You'll get there, Alb, the clever ones do.
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This is a bit of a dangerous idea to my mind - two of my cleverest and most creative, interesting friends from my teenage years didn't 'get there' due to drug accidents, and one had more or less that mindset. He's permanently impaired by a speed overdose which should have killed him (he's a completely different person, a much less bright, interesting and capable individual because of it) and another's dead of smack. They were both phenomenally clever and had so much going for them.

Albion, for gawd's sake don't buy powdered benzos / their analogs again. They are one of the number one trainwreck inducers available and this is proven time and time again in EADD alone. Hope things are going a bit better now anyway.
 
sockpuppet said:
I'm laughing at the thread too, but if you really want advice mine is this: slow down with the drugs in general. I've been following you as I follow all the more interesting and bright BL characters and have been sorry to see what appears to be a steady increase in almost random polydrug abuse. If you want to be a full time druggie in later years by all means carry on, but I very much regret taking that course when I was young and I'll bet more than a few lurkers around here would say the same. No judgements, just many many years of watching friends go down......Life is long and there will be plenty of time for drugs, but not if you overdo it when young. Hope you don't mind the suggestion. Good luck regardless.....
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Some solid advice here Sockpuppet. I sympathise with you on the sleepy village thing Alb, often there really isn't much to do beside exploring your own head swimming in various substances but I wouldn't be so sure having your own place and being in the city with mates will solve that many things for you as the temptation for drug abuse rather than recreational usage increases severalfold, especially if you're living on your own with no other housemates to let you know whether you're being a messhead or not. If I could have gone back and curbed the increasing desire to explore various substances in purely hedonistic style then I would definitely do so as the negative impacts they have had on my life as a result of substance abuse rather than usage have unfortunately outweighed the positives.

When you mention needing a girlfriend, I can know where you are coming from but would also say this. Although my current girlfriend has been very helpful in me not abusing myself to the same extent as I was previously, the amount of shit I have put her through over the last couple of years and the guilt in knowing that I have caused another human being so much stress and heartache is a pretty horrible feeling.

Really don't mean to sound condescending at all in what I've said and I hope it doesn't come across like that! As other posters have mentioned, you seem like a damn smart chap and a very welcome addition to the board, always here if you need a chat mate <3
 
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I don't think I've ever read an "I bought powdered benzos & everything was OK" story on here lol.

I bought a gram of diaz one time, everything was OK (just to add a bit of balance :)), no scales were ever used, no bad things happened - coz I'm fucking built for this shit.


Disclaimer - Any sort of benzo powder = bad idea. Unless you're me, which you're not, so don't.
 
parttime crackhead said:
I don't think I've ever read an "I bought powdered benzos & everything was OK" story on here lol.
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Haha, quote for the motherfucking truth. I Went through a brief period of having powdered diaz+alprazolam powder in my goodies box alongside ketamine which resulted in a week or so blank spot in my mind, broken furnishings and my housemate telling me to get a fucking grip!
 
growit&smokeit said:
my advice would be to stop doing etizolam. benzos make you do stuid shit. ive stayed up all night painting, fucked on benzos and sniffing k till 4 in the morning then wondering in to a meeting at work with paint all over myself before. they are fun but can lead to irresponsible behaviour.
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Benzos and K are an awful mix when considering balance and disorientation. Recently one night, I fell into my drum kit about four times, woke up the next day with a chest of drawers on it's side, and bruises all over my torso. There was also a nasty clump of dried blood in my hair from a cut on my forehead. One of the bruises hurt for about 3 weeks, thought I'd cracked a rib. I also locked myself out of the room where my stash was in for about an hour - couldn't get the key to work...was ridiculous.
 
jancrow said:
This is a bit of a dangerous idea to my mind - two of my cleverest and most creative, interesting friends from my teenage years didn't 'get there' due to drug accidents, and one had more or less that mindset. He's permanently impaired by a speed overdose which should have killed him (he's a completely different person, a much less bright, interesting and capable individual because of it) and another's dead of smack. They were both phenomenally clever and had so much going for them.
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Curiosity killed the cat, innit?

Highly inquisitive and creative types are often quite vulnerable to the perils of drug use. It's instilled at birth through the passing of certain genes. In the naivety of childhood it manifests itself as a strong urge to create or learn and understand new things. These types of people are usually never satisfied and keep on pushing themselves to receive bigger endogenous rewards. They live for that rush of β-endorphin that accompanies each Eureka moment! The dopamine that motivates them to create music & art, and the added pleasure which is received when they are appraised for their good work. Then... Puberty! You want to experience new things, just like any normal inquisitive person would. You're probably considered a bit different, but are taken under the wing of the "in crowd" because they can't quite figure you out, but know there's something worthwhile in that brain of yours thats good to be around and interacting with. It's only a matter of time before you get stoned, and are blown away by the way it affects your perceptions and the ability it instills in you to conceptualise new and abstract ideas, most of which turn out to to be complete and utter stoned nonsense. But it doesn't matter, because there's that similar feeling you felt as a child when you were learning or creating. Each new drug you try takes you down a different path, each with its own rewards and insights. Pushing the baseline of pleasure/satisfaction to new highs. You start to realise the passion you once had for learning and creating is diminishing, no longer filling you with that same sense of enjoyment that it once did. Fuck it, I'll do some drugs then come back to my work later. But the more you entertain that lifestyle, the quicker the flame burns out. Suddenly you find yourself not coming up with the ideas you once had, you find it harder to retain information. Not like before when it came effortlessly. Somethings changed, and now you are only left with the odd flicker of light.

tr;dr Less drugs, more creating. And as for the girlfriend thing, hold on in there dude and keep up your good work, in the end it will pay off bigtime. :]
 
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33Hz said:
Curiosity killed the cat, innit?

Highly inquisitive and creative types are often quite vulnerable to the perils of drug use. It's instilled at birth through the passing of certain genes. In the naivety of childhood it manifests itself as a strong urge to create or learn and understand new things. These types of people are usually never satisfied and keep on pushing themselves to receive bigger endogenous rewards. They live for that rush of β-endorphin that accompanies each Eureka moment! The dopamine that motivates them to create music & art, and the added pleasure which is received when they are appraised for their good work. Then... Puberty! You want to experience new things, just like any normal inquisitive person would. You're probably considered a bit different, but are taken under the wing of the "in crowd" because they can't quite figure you out, but know there's something worthwhile in that brain of yours thats good to be around and interacting with. It's only a matter of time before you get stoned, and are blown away by the way it affects your perceptions and the ability it instills in you to conceptualise new and abstract ideas, most of which turn out to to be complete and utter stoned nonsense. But it doesn't matter, because there's that similar feeling you felt as a child when you were learning or creating. Each new drug you try takes you down a different path, each with its own rewards and insights. Pushing the baseline of pleasure/satisfaction to new highs. You start to realise the passion you once had for learning and creating is diminishing, no longer filling you with that same sense of enjoyment that it once did. Fuck it, I'll do some drugs then come back to my work later. But the more you entertain that lifestyle, the quicker the flame burns out. Suddenly you find yourself not coming up with the ideas you once had, you find it harder to retain information. Not like before when it came effortlessly. Somethings changed, and now you are only left with the odd flicker of light.

tr;dr Less drugs, more creating. And as for the girlfriend thing, hold on in there dude and keep up your good work, in the end it will pay off bigtime. :]
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Great post - story of my life so far, as it is for I guess many others on here. Nice reading a post with such insight :)
 
jancrow said:
This is a bit of a dangerous idea to my mind - two of my cleverest and most creative, interesting friends from my teenage years didn't 'get there' due to drug accidents, and one had more or less that mindset. He's permanently impaired by a speed overdose which should have killed him (he's a completely different person, a much less bright, interesting and capable individual because of it) and another's dead of smack. They were both phenomenally clever and had so much going for them.

.
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Yeah just cos your bright or well educated means nothing .

Addiction isn't prejudice.
Still i'm sure our Alby will be presenting T4 again before we no it.
 
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