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What are you craving? v "Let's get an eightball! It'll last us all weekend!"

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I'm thinking we might go see our guy in a little bit. I just got through meeting with my lawyer. It looks like I'll be able to get my shit together.

I'm feeling more optimistic now, but I also feel like this will be the start of something new, a real change and a real second chance. I won't be doing this forever. I can't be doing this forever. I'd better get my rocks off now because soon I'll be going back to school, finishing up, and looking for a real job in the field I went to school for.
 
you-can-do-it.jpg
 
Meth I guess, even though I never did it.

I barely got any sleep last night, went to class, went to work, did homework, went back to work and now I have to write a paper tonight.


So really what I mean to say is heroin. Heroin, heroin, heroin.

Or oxy,



NO! What I really want is to just montage myself reading and doing the paper. Ya know, like in the movies when there's just a montage of people doing work set to an upbeat soundtrack? That would be wicked sweet right now. Montage.
 
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I have been sober for...... 106 days. Damn. Went from get high on something every day to nadda. First time in a in patient rehab. Now 90 days house arrest. Right now I would go for just about anything. Sadly meth. I hate that I tried it months ago. The thought of it is in the back of my head constantly. Then theres opiates. Even for my large size and high tolerance I managed to atleast get off a lil bit on some tramadol. Alls I really need is about 40mgs of some oxy and im set for the day. Man.... if only.
 
Tramadol.. Picking up that box at the pharmacy wasn't a very good idea. I keep thinking about tapering instead of c/ting like I am now. Dammit.
 
I'm gonna run out of methadone a little early sadly cuz I been taking a little much the past few days cuz of my grandma dying. So I wish I had some more opioids. Doesn't have to be methadone. Though I'd save it for a few days.

Some opana would be soo kick ass. I'd kill for some oxymorphone. Even just one 20mg ER, but preferably one 40mg ER (old formulation). Or 2-4 10mg IRs
 
Oh thank god I just got 16mg of bupe as I'm going to run out of methadone (only have 50mg of methadone left and 1mg of clonazepam left - there is a possibility I have .5mg somewhere on the floor). I wish I had enough methadone to get me to the first monday in june, but the bupe will do fine. Just gotta use .5mg of clonazpeam each night (2 days) after I finish the 50mg of methadone off (3 days, 20, 15, 15) so I can sleep at night, till I can use the bupe with out a percp wd
 
I'm not craving it, but some dope would be nice. I think there's a pretty good chance that we could pick up today without spending any money; our dealer said something the other day about having new bags and wanting us to try them....so....*fingers crossed* lol
 
Ketamine. I may have finally found a new source. But ofcoure I lack the funds atm.

edit: Craving a benzo even more. I've run out, thought I could get a refill today. But forgot today is a holiday so the pharmacy is closed. Damn.

edit2: Lol, incredible.. I was feeling perfectly fine until I figured out I won't be able to have my valium today.
 
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