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Is your ex's sister " off limits "

I think the issue is the OP would regret it for the rest of his life if he doesn't pursue it. Sounds like he's been obsessing about her for two years already.

I'd say go for it, if only to get it out of both of your systems. Her relationship with your ex is her business not yours. She's an adult and she'll need to accept responsibility for her own decisions. I would however say keep it secret at first and only tell people if after 6 months or so you decide to make it official. Best of luck to you both!
 
^ YES. THIS, EXACTLY. I wrote my own post too so I will keep it here even though it agrees with lola.

I think people are looking at this situation only from a negative perspective. First of all, if this is real love, express it to her and go for it. You only live once. You're not "doing something bad" to anyone!

Second, you don't have to decide for her sister. Isn't she her own person? Isn't she mature? If the answers to both questions are "yes," then let her make her own decisions. You don't have to figure out anything but your end. For someone to be giving advice trying to "protect" the ex-wife, especially without knowing all the facts, completely devalues her sister and her ability to make decisions, as well as what's important for you.

Finally, why would her sister necessarily flip out, and why would her family not accept your new relationship? That's not a given. If it was the wrong match the first time, and especially if it was her who cheated and presumably wanted out, why wouldn't she be thrilled for the both of you? Do they not want her sister to be happy?
 
why would her family not accept your new relationship? That's not a given.
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lol It just doesn't work that way IRL. Sure, it would be great if no one cared and everyone is happy, but it doesn't work that way. But, I think he is the one who said the family wouldn't be happy first. Not sure, but I thought he was the first one who said the family won't be happy about it, but I'm totally going off of memory there.
 
He did say that, and I'm assuming it's because he has a sense that someone in the family would freak out. But what I'm saying is that if his ex-wife is not still in love with him, it would be very selfish and petty of any of her family to not embrace a genuine, loving couple. If he had dumped his wife for her hotter sister in the middle of what everyone assumed was a good marriage, that would be different.

If his ex is a jealous, vindictive person who can't stand to see other people happy, and on that basis rejected the OP and her sister for being together and insisted the rest of the family do the same, then hopefully the rest of the family would recognize that such is entirely the ex's problem and her sister should not suffer because of the ex's defective personality.
 
He later said it's been 2 years I think since the divorce. I still think it's weird if I were to put myself in the situation, but I'm also close with my sister and her hubby. He's like a brother to me. My sister would flip the fuck out. I know that for sure.

I guess mayyybe if the ex-wife doesn't care, then it would be a pretty easy transition. OP, would your ex-wife flip out? Or would she really not give a shit? 2 years is a while, so it's possible she won't care.
 
Would she flip the fuck out ?

Oh yes there would be faeces hitting the fan, and lots of it.

That's the problem.
 
Fuck it. Hide it, sneak it, out in the open, or not. Just do it.

It's a ridiculous notion to me to deny yourselves, and each other, something so potentially wonderful as what you lead us to believe you have. Life thrives on the memories of moments and who do you want those memories to be with 20 years down the road? I'm sure it's not yourself, possibly alone, looking back on the memories full of regret that you didn't pursue it. Damn what anybody else thinks.

Even flying shit can't defy gravity. It has to stop flying at some point. Just as an ex-wife drama filled period of life can't be smoothed out by time.
 
Her parents would flip out as well.

They know nothing about her cheating the years of lies and is the favorite of their two daughters.
The golden child in their eyes.
 
blah blah said:
Fuck it. Hide it, sneak it, out in the open, or not. Just do it.

It's a ridiculous notion to me to deny yourselves, and each other, something so potentially wonderful as what you lead us to believe you have. Life thrives on the memories of moments and who do you want those memories to be with 20 years down the road? I'm sure it's not yourself, possibly alone, looking back on the memories full of regret that you didn't pursue it. Damn what anybody else thinks.
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That's exactly how I feel ......... Sometimes just fuck it , put on my nikes and just do it.

So sure she is the one I should have been with all Along.

Don't like the idea of secrecy but it might just be worth the risk.
 
Thanks to all the other respondents too.

It's given me a lot to think about.

I like blah's answer the best , truth be told it's what I wanted to hear.
 
My pleasure man. Don't let all my cohorts on PR and ED know this because my reputation would be shot to shit...but I'm a deep seeded hopeless romantic and the thought of going without what you describe, when it's right there in front of you, is unthinkable lunacy.

If sneaking be the route you take then who knows, maybe you'll find it wasn't what you both cooked it up to be and it could be left at that, nobody pissed, no bridges burned. Given nobody finds out of course haha.

My preferred route? Out in the open, no shame, no fear, fuck em and be proud of having the balls to do something socially taboo like that when the scales are containing what they are, happiness or loneliness.

Do it dude. Jump in, both feet, all the way, and have faith that she's just as bold too.
 
I've already called and asked her if she would like to get away next weekend.

She said , drumroll ..........,,,,,

" I'd like that "

Thought she might.

Let you know how it goes.

Thanks again
 
Atta Boy!! I'm curious to know what her feedback will be on the whole scenario as I'm sure you two will end up discussing that on this venture. Well done sir.

This is my first time in the SLR community forum and i hate to say it, but i may just have to visit this joint more often. What better place to end up than a place revolving around love, where one of my favorite hobbies is Ecstasy.

Hmmm i may just have to throw up a pic of the most current "Blah's Love Interest's "rival body"" to combat what you say ;)

Go get em....
 
Thats coincidental , Its my first post on SLR (Long time listener , first time caller).

AND Myself AND my "Girlfriend/X - sister inlaw" are big fans of the release sarah
Tonin movement.
 
Considering the sexual tension that has existed between us for several years its quite possible we might literally explode next weekend.
 
LOL well it wouldn't be normal if i didn't throw in there to do your guy's thing for a weekend...feel each other out in this new dynamic, see if it fits, if it's all gravy then...

ROLL YOUR FUCKIN FACES OFF TOGETHER NEXT WEEKEND!! AAAAAHHHHH MAGIC!!

(provided you have reagent tested your goodies and have given yourselves a proper time span from your last use)

Sorry SLR I can't help it when that comes out...i'll go back to Ecstasy Discussion and Pillreports now...LOVE ON HEISENBURG!!
 
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