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Your abuse and your significant other

BabyGurl3171

BabyGurl3171

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May 25, 2010
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In my mind. The choices are many, the consequences
Ok, I'm sorry first off for the language I will be usin...
That said, does your SO (significant other) use with you? If not, do they bitch about it? How do you handle it?
I'm askin bc my quite possibly soon to be ex is a fuckin hypocrite and a fuckin moron!
He has always used with me, even now on probation he waits til after his test and takes my shit. Now, outta no where he's got this holier than you shit goin on AND had the fuckin balls to go off about my usin and ALL my connects in front of my kids! OMFG, I can't even explain how pissed I am, not to mention how wrong this shit was. I feel so damn evil right now I'd like to have him tested for benzos, I'm scripted he's not. But I'm not a little bitch like that.
Anyway, sorry to rant, but does anyone else deal with this? How the fuck do you manage? Ugh!!!
 
Lie. Haha as bad as it sounds thats the only way I avoid conflict. My gf likes taking stuff with me but quite frankly I don't like to share. I almost have a secret second life. When I get extra I make up a story about how I got it then we will enjoy it together but otherwise my doctor appts and pharmacy visits are "work meetings" or things of that nature. Its the only way to avoid conflict for the time being. I actually am usually the one telling her to take less because she takes a lot of my xanax script (thats the only drug she knows im prescribed). The reason I get on her about it is because I don't want her hooked because of my problems.

So to answer your question you have to find the happy medium between truth and lying. I compare it to "white lies".. avoid hurting someone else by lying. I know if people have a true problem or are looking for help family/friends are crucial to help with recovery, i'm not denying or advising against that. But when trying to maintain peace in my life regarding my situation that's how I do it.
 
Is he actually clean ?? these days it not really clear in your post
 
Hybris said:
Lie. Haha as bad as it sounds thats the only way I avoid conflict. My gf likes taking stuff with me but quite frankly I don't like to share. I almost have a secret second life. When I get extra I make up a story about how I got it then we will enjoy it together but otherwise my doctor appts and pharmacy visits are "work meetings" or things of that nature. Its the only way to avoid conflict for the time being. I actually am usually the one telling her to take less because she takes a lot of my xanax script (thats the only drug she knows im prescribed). The reason I get on her about it is because I don't want her hooked because of my problems.

So to answer your question you have to find the happy medium between truth and lying. I compare it to "white lies".. avoid hurting someone else by lying. I know if people have a true problem or are looking for help family/friends are crucial to help with recovery, i'm not denying or advising against that. But when trying to maintain peace in my life regarding my situation that's how I do it.
Click to expand...

Thanks! That's actually a really, really good idea :) I'm rx'd them so I'll just tell him I'm goin to be usin only as directed. Pretend to be takin my doses while really buildin up a stash to take for my fun. Hehe. Thanks again!
 
Welcome ;) hopefully it works out for you! I hate to condone lying and rarely do but this is one of those weird situations. Yours is a little tougher because he already knows you take them.. but like you said just tell him you're going to take only what you are prescribed from now on. Anything you buy extra, just stash it ;) its bad enough I have anxiety/sleep issues and a wrecked shoulder, I need the meds and also enjoy the extra effects here and there. Last thing people like us need is our significant other leeching off of everything we get and ending up hooked, let alone the problem of supply running out twice as fast. Maybe I'm being selfish but it is what it is.. damn the lives we live sometimes haha
 
I dont think this is the proper forum. Ther eis a love and relation ship forum or maybe the dark side.
 
I'm going to try this in Sex, Love and Relationships BabyGurl, although I would also recommend checking out The Dark Side forum if you want some support or just have a vent (we have a vent/rant thread) - link in my sig :)

Hope that is okay. Inflammatory/off topic comments have been removed guys, lets keep this civil and on track please :)

BDD > SLR
 
Does my significant other use with me? Oh hell yeah! I know that this is terrible to say, but uh, I don't care... I need a girl who can get down like that, a girl who can do dirt and fuckin' grind with me... a girl I can take with me to the fuckin' projects and cop bundles and whatever. It's fucking hot, and I wouldn't want it any other way.

I don't want to keep secrets, man. I don't want to be having to do this shit behind my significant others back, always having to dodge questions and sneak around; I want it all out in the open... better yet, I want it all chopped up and out in the open... even better still, I want it all chopped up, divided into six or seven neat little lines, and out in the open... yeah you see where this is going...
 
My old girl was like that yo.. like the 'i can do anything you can do better' attitude. Like totally gung ho to cop at some innercity ghetto sets and shit. No fear of cops or anything lol...until she got a arrested. But yeah it is nice havin a girl who basically has the same ddrug problem as you, at times I thought it was a good thing like if we were both getting clean , then a lot of times i was like yo this is terrible.. havin her is making this this and that happen.

For me it made it hard like if she wanted to use one night and I didnt or had no money.. like if you hav eto watch someone using right in fron tof you its nearly impossible to fight the overwhelming urge to dose! So we could be bad influences on each other but that worked both ways..

I look back on the relation ship with that girl as a crazy one becaue we were crazy coppin in patrson shootin on brooklyn rooftops and hallways just plain 'ol fun.

Yo weirdest thing.. I am like nodding out as I am writing this and I keep dreaming of that show Bering Sea Gold on Discovery about the gold dredgers in Alaska..like 3 times now I look at what I wrote and theres a random line in there about the show I just watched before 'yeah seein that big ass platform with the escavator on it just colleccting ounce after ounce of gold make u think'

Anyway obviously I need to go to sleep or something this post is out of conrol organzation thrown out the window lol
 
Thanks for the replies/input.
I was truthful out the gate that I had drugs if choice, I pay for them and I'm grown so if he didn't like it the door was always open for him to leave. He had the same vices and for almost 4 years we were cool. This shitty attitude came from left field. Perhaps he was goin through wd's and took it out on me. I don't know. But even after todays, err yesterday now, apology I'm goin to keep my usage none of his business. I think it'll be better that way. What sucks is almost all our connects are his Army buddies. But I'll figure something out!
 
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