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Why did/do you want to get clean/sober?

Nodding

Nodding

Greenlighter
Joined
Jan 20, 2012
Messages
41
Location
UK
This is something I'm really struggling to come to terms with at the moment.
I've got my opiate use down to £20 a day (Methadone keeps me out of WDs then I have an evening treat of 2 bags), something that I can afford without too much trouble.
I know all too well that the problem is keeping it to just £20 a day, but my question is this: If your DOC isn't having that much of a negative impact on your life, do you really need to cut it out?

It's not causing me financial problems.
It's not causing me social problems (I still have a great group of friends whom I see regularly).
It's not causing me health problems (I'm very careful with IVing, after 2 years of daily shooting I've yet to loose a vein).

So what is the desperate need to get off it?
Today is day 3 of not using on top of my Done script, but in all honesty I'm spending all day every day debating with myself whether or not I should pick up. Again this is my point, if I had something I would have been so much more productive this weekend.

So again, what would you do in this situation? I guess I'm just looking for justification to go score, but you get my point.
 
hi friend!

you recently gave me some great advice, and I'll do my best to the same for you :P.

Although I cannot really speak on a personal behalf, as I have never tried opiates, only Cannabis MDMA and some psychedelics, I think you should definitely try to cut down the habit.
Opiates I hear are one of the most addictive substances, and although I am naive to try it maybe sometime, it can't be good to be physically and psychologically dependent on a drug.

Me myself, a heavy marijuana smoker, I thought I had no problems smoking 3-4 times daily. Until I realized that I was missing out on other important aspects of my life. I am now currently taking a break, and it makes me feel good that I don't need to turn to marijuana to make me feel okay. After being high for a myriad of months, I feel good to finally break the habit. It makes me feel in control of my life. Although I am struggling with a lot of everyday issues, it makes me relieved that I am capable of living life soberly.

You say you haven't run into any problems as of now, that's great! but continuing down that path can lead to a self-destructive path in my opinion. Just think about what you could be doing instead of shooting up. I could have done a LOT more productive things last summer instead of smoking weed all day. I now see why overindulgence in a substance can is harmful.

If you cut down, think about other things you could be doing and excelling at. Think about your future. Your reply on my thread made has encouraged me want to find security, confidence, and happiness in my future. I wish you the same.

If you think it's a good idea to shoot up every now and then, go ahead. But don't let heroin shoot you.

You say it's only costing you £20 a day, and it isn't causing money issues. But think about if you accumulated a good portion of that money where it could go. I have spent over 2 grand from last summer to now on marijuana. I now know I shouldn't have indulged that much, as I look back and realize it wasn't all really worth it when I could have been spending time in other areas of my life too.

One thing I learned from this forum is that opiate addiction can be conquered by doing little things, such as subtle changes in environments and daily-routines.

I'm no opiate expert, but I hope I gave you some food for thought as you have given me.
 
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Well said ^

Here's what it is. It doesn't look like that you want to quit. But I can't speak for you at all, so it's up to you to decide how this is affecting you. The best reason I can give you at this point is that there is no seeing where dope addiction can lead to because it's so unpredictable. There are people who can maintain it recreationally for years and then one slip up leads to another. So do you feel like you NEED TO QUIT, or that you WANT TO QUIT? Both are very different, but you should want to quit because you need to.
 
Sublime - Good to hear you're feeling a bit more optimistic mate, thanks for the reply!

Badfish - That's exactly it, I don't want to quit at all. Pressure from friends/family, it seeming to be 'the right thing to do' are the only reasons I'm not high right now.

I know all too well what happens when opiate use gets out of hand, I've been very close to being homeless before, had to make 1-2 days food last over a week because I was so broke, sat in tears because I couldn't hit a vein while my last shot was rapidly coagulating (before I knew how to shoot well / had Methadone to rely on) - believe me I've experienced the lows these drugs can bring.

But now, a few years later, I've got a steady income with plenty to spare each month, I can IV better than most doctors (hehe), I just don't see why I should give it up.
I mean, if I was smoking 20 a day my family would probably remind me now and then that I should quit, but that would be it. Yet I take a shot once a night and suddenly I'm a desperate junkie who needs help.

Maybe I'll just keep it to once a week. I take Sundays Done home on Saturday so maybe I'll just buy a gram or 2 every Sunday and spend the day getting lit.

*shrugs* definitely open to peoples opinions / experiences on this though!
 
The truth is only you understand your addiction. I've been pressured to quit drugs, and you know, I never did it until I found a good reason to quit using for myself, and that made all the difference. I was happy with quitting, it was much easier, and just being able to see a goal and point to quitting is what got me through. Knowing that I was the one motivating myself to make a change for the better in my life is what made all the difference.

It's good that you've seen the potentials of opiate addiction, because now you know what it looks like and it's at least a motivator to keep yourself. I think that giving yourself a schedule for your use is a great idea, but you'll need to be strict with following it. Schedules have a tendency of slipping. Just be careful =D I can still only know you over the internet and be worried.
 
Why did I decide to get clean? I simply could not live with myself another day, the pain was excruciating. I had no issues with law enforcement. I had a good job. My family was not aware of my addiction. Therefore, I had no external forces telling me to quit, it all came from within.
 
Missykins when you say the pain was excruciating what do you mean (if you don't mind me asking)?
 
Nodding said:
If your DOC isn't having that much of a negative impact on your life, do you really need to cut it out?

It's not causing me financial problems.
It's not causing me social problems (I still have a great group of friends whom I see regularly).
It's not causing me health problems (I'm very careful with IVing, after 2 years of daily shooting I've yet to loose a vein).

So what is the desperate need to get off it?
Click to expand...
Others have already posted some good comments in here already but I thought I'd add my 2 cents.
This is exactly what I've been going through with my alcohol addiction for the last 2 years or so. Drinking has not caused me any real problems yet....but that is the key word: YET! The reason I need to quit drinking is not because of what it is doing to me NOW, because it's not really having a big negative impact on me right now. But because of the trouble it is going to cause me in the future if I continue to drink; health troubles, family and relationship troubles, possibly job and financial troubles. This makes it really difficult to convince myself that quitting is the right thing to do NOW because addiction is such an immediate-short-term thing, you need the drug NOW so you gratify yourself and get rid of the cravings NOW. It's really hard for your brain to look that far in to the future and tell itself that you need to quit because of the bad things that are going to happen to you 5, 10, 20 years down the track.

But lately I've been wanting to quit because I just hate the fact that I can't get through one day without a drink. I hate that a substance controls me like that. I hate that I feel powerless over it, and I'm scared of things getting worse in the future. I'm getting closer to wanting to start a family soon and I absolutely cannot have this substance controlling me if I want to be a good mother.

What does this mean for you? Maybe you've got to look deeper in to it than just the usual conventional reasons that people usually want to quit drugs. If the usual money/health/relationships reasons don't apply to your situation, then maybe you've got to find your own unique reason why you need to quit. You also need to remember that when we're addicted, our DOC takes up pretty much all of our time. If we take the drug out of the equation there is a whooollle heap of spare time left in our day/week/month/life that we actively need to fill up with new activities that don't involve drugs. If you weren't doing drugs, what else would you want to do with your time? Is there some hobby or activity you've always wanted to be able to do but couldn't because you were getting high? Is there something you wish to aspire to become, but can't because of your addiction? I dunno mate, I'm sure there's something. But after all is said and done, you need to quit for yourself, for your own reason(s) <3
 
i just read your first post, not the whole thread, sorry i repeat something. i'm in an outpatient program right now. i've seen people with a lot of TERRIBLE opiate problems. no one ever thought they would get as bad as they did. i've met people that stole from their parents/friends/siblings and burglarized houses/cars/stores just to get money to get more dope. just because you haven't experienced anything negative yet doesn't mean you won't. no matter how low your lowest low in life is, you can always get lower. you said yourself you're just looking for a reason to go score. quit while you're ahead
 
well i have gotten off an opiate habit in the last 3 weeks, for a week or so i was really pleased with my determination and then realised i am still smoking two grams of weed and drinking 2 bottles of wine virtually everyday, i wanted to get opiates out of my life as felt they consumed my existence but i now realise that the idea of total sobriety is something i wish to acheive but am frightened to attempt. after 16 years of telling myself getting totally wasted everyday was recreational to realising i have serious substance abuse issues has given me a bit of a fright , i am from a family of 12 step fiends, AA, NA, GA and while they all seem to swear by it i have heard the dialoge my whole life and always thought i could get through things with my own intelligence, i now realise i am a stupid fuck

sorry, its been a tough day, i almost scored some gear to help with my huge anxiety this morning, instead resorted to scotch, fuck this self medication shit, i want to wake up and think about my day without it revolving how i function with a buzz to cope, i always thought i was a functioning drug user/abuser, yeah right, self delusion at its best

i am yet to see a regular opiate user not lose control over their life, if u can maintain your use then you a rare species but tolerance is a bitch and once the routine of being high is part of your daily life things can spiral out of control and you may not realise this until u have gotten your self in that situation

i have been wasted over half my life, sobriety almost seems like a novelty
 
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Rocked: As I said a few posts back I know all about the lows; I've stolen from most members of my family (via different methods each time), I haven't burgled anything but still, not a day goes by that I don't regret some of the things I've done.

N3o: You've just said what I've been trying to say, thank you! :)
It's not that I need to quit right now, it's that things could go very wrong in the future if I don't quit.
There's no way I'll manage to stop completely at the moment, but I can cut down. My new goal is to use for days a week (a mild cut down) then eventually down to 2 days, 1 day, once a fortnight and so on.

Thanks for the replies everybody, you've all been a big help in getting my head straightened ou! :D
 
Nodding said:
There's no way I'll manage to stop completely at the moment, but I can cut down. My new goal is to use for days a week (a mild cut down) then eventually down to 2 days, 1 day, once a fortnight and so on.
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This is a good plan mate, I sincerely wish you all the best with it. You can do it. Keep us updated with how you're doing okay? <3
 
Nodding said:
in all honesty I'm spending all day every day debating with myself whether or not I should pick up.
Click to expand...

Why quit? Simply to be able to spend your days with more creative things than this, mate!

(and if you want second opinions on the idea of goin from 7 to 4 to 2 days/week, read Junky, by William Burroughs.)
lots of love, lots of luck!
 
OP, You used the word desperate first. No one said you have to do anything, it's all about what you want to do. Many people can't do much when they think about drugs all the time, just work and pay taxes, or maybe just pay taxes (drugs).

Is there a desperate need to get off it or not? That's up to you to decide. You already know the answer.
 
my worst enemy said:
and if you want second opinions on the idea of goin from 7 to 4 to 2 days/week, read Junky, by William Burroughs.
Click to expand...
I swear I'm the only addict that hasn't read that book, what do you mean there mate?

Thanks for all the replies everyone, you really are a lovely bunch of people :)

I seem to bounce between really wanting to be off of everything and being pretty content with using.
Honestly I think saying I can only use X number of days each week will work well for me. If I know that I can't use today, but that I can use the day after, for some reason my will power is much stronger.
My plan is to cap myself at using 4 days a week, but try to go as long as possible between days 'on'. If I can go 2 days off for every on, well that's great, but to start with I'm saying 4.
Anyway I'm rambling, definitely time for bed.

I'll be sure to keep the forum updated in some form or other, you all give some fantastic advice!
 
You should quit because what if one day you get a bad bag and shoot up poison and die. Then your good life with money and a place will go down the drain. What if you lose your job or income is lower and your addiction is higher and you need more and you are stuck in w/d.

Or you should stop so you could use all the money on something better like a new cool hobbie or clothes or taking a boy/girls out?

I hope you don't stay on it forever. Eventually you will miss a vein. Run out of money. Get sick. Or what if you want kids one day or a family. You can't grow and move in in life if you are an addict and it kills everyone around you....

Good luck! :) what do you want to do?
 
why would people want to IV a drug? it will only lead to bad habits and or danger - is enjoying drugs orally/safely too much to ask?
 
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