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I weigh 310 pounds. How to be successful with women?

Roger32

Bluelighter
Joined
Jun 3, 2007
Messages
289
Have tried to lose weight, never really been successful at it. Been overweight all my life.

Have not had sex in 18 months and it is brutal. Only had sex with 4 women in my entire life. I was in a relationship with one of them for over 6 months, another 2 months or so, and under a month for the other 2

I mean I recently turned 25 and it is time. I want a woman in my life. I am a regular guy, graduated college, got a decent job, and I am a good, genuine, stable person.

Any tips or suggestions to be more successful in this area?
 
The two most attractive traits one can possess are health and confidence. Don't cop out on your weight though, if its something that bothers you (which it clearly is.) Then do something about it. I'm currently in the middle of some fairly significant weight loss myself. I have lost 60 pounds and have never felt better in my life, and it shows. I tend to notice a lot more girls checking me out. Likely due to increased confidence allowing me to see their faces instead of my feet. If you really don't want to get in better shape than just accept that you are limiting your options with females. Very few people look forward to loving somebody is is nearly certain to die early of diabetes heart attack and/or stroke. But once you've accepted that you need to. Love yourself and believe in yourself. Be confident and collected when you meet woman. You'd be surprised how far a liitle confidence will get ya ;)
 
diet AND exercise, is the only way to lose weight. If that does not work you need to contact your physician, or even talk to your physician before hand so they can advise you and make sure you do not have any biological disorders. eg overactive thyroid.

aside from that, post on craigslist as a larger man.
Accept that the worlds population is shallow and accept your personal circumstances, does not mean you can't shoot for the stars but you may only be capable of shooting for the tree tops.
learn to love inanimate objects, or cats ect.

if you don't like those you have alternatives, like
making a shit ton of money and getting a sugar baby
making some what of a shit ton of money and getting a mail order bride

alternately take leasons from mr. awesome.
http://www.shockandawesome.com/
 
hiphophippy - that'd be 'under active' thyroid...hypothyroidism...

OP - my advice to you, is if you are planning on staying at the size you are and you wanna pick up chicks and get laid, you gotta OWN IT. Confidence and personality goes a hell of a long way with women, even if they're not drooling over you like some slim cut pretty boy. I met a friend of a friend last year who, when I first saw him, thought "Wow, that's a big dude..." (he's probably 6' tall and 300+lbs) I am personally very attracted to slim/lean men, but after getting to know this person, I found myself finding him a bit sexually desirable because he had so much charisma, charm, happiness and personality, and he was not shy about who he is or what he looks like.

Maybe do a search on the internet for 'chubby chasers' in your area - groups/clubs that are geared towards bigger folks, and the people who like to date them.

Wish you luck in your dating future.
 
Self confidence is key.
Big guys with a big head on their shoulders can get mad women. I know because I was with a guy that size, and his father is even bigger. His father gets all kinds of women.

It is all about confidence.

Just be yourself, but love yourself, then you will be able to love a woman. You might be shocked but WE, the women are just as scared and self conscious as you are!!! Usually worse.
 
Confidence is the most important thing.
I've seen unattractive guys (in my opinion) dating good looking and successful women because they are confident.
 
If you lack the foundation to be self confident you can always try douchebaggery at your age it still works.
 
I can't really say much because of all the people above me have said enough in my mind. Have a lot of confidence! I think this is what you are lacking of...
Also if you REALLY want to lose wieght then DO IT there is never really a excuse. You need to EXERCISE start of a little and build up the amount, the type, and the length of work outs you do every week. Eat healthier! One thing that you want to cut and will make you lose wieght it carbs, anything with startch and wheat. Don't cut it all but do it slowly. Cut more and more every weak. Mostly bread and pasta...
That + Working out WILL work and don't say it won't... a lot of people DON'T try hard enough OR long enough or BOTH. If you really want it then you'll do it it may take time and work but is worth it and can build self confidance.
 
Confidence like others have said, and you're in luck, because after Rubin Studdard, lots of girls like that big teddy bear look. :)
 
Have tried to lose weight, never really been successful at it. Been overweight all my life.

Have not had sex in 18 months and it is brutal. Only had sex with 4 women in my entire life. I was in a relationship with one of them for over 6 months, another 2 months or so, and under a month for the other 2

I mean I recently turned 25 and it is time. I want a woman in my life. I am a regular guy, graduated college, got a decent job, and I am a good, genuine, stable person.

Any tips or suggestions to be more successful in this area?
why don't you try going for a girl your own weight, then you wouldn't have to lose any weight.
 
As tedious as it probably sounds, I have to agree that health is a big factor in feeling good about yourself. Even healthy eating and exercising without significant weight loss will make you feel good. I know after Christmas I felt awful, even though I'd only gained a couple of kilos and a week or so of healthy eating and exercising made me feel like a new woman even though I didn't actually lose any weight.

If you're a fun, happy guy within yourself you're halfway there. Get out there with your friends and live your life; go to gigs, pubs, sports, events or whatever's your thing and you'll find lots of girls around.

Meeting people isn't easy for most of us but it does happen for most people, so try not to stress about it, you're young still.
 
i date a big boy, and am happier than i've ever been in my whole life. he's brilliant, witty, funny, outgoing, charming, and handsome. he is totally confident in what he does (or doesn't do). i decided at the start of our relationship that i didn't care about his weight, and still don't. if i had, i would have missed out on one of the best relationships i've ever had. since we've been living together, he's lost weight -- more vegetarian food, more bike rides, and just being happy with someone. participate in things you love and the devotion to the hobby/sport/whatever will shine through. :)
 
OP, your 'stats' aren't that bad. I have a question though. What are you looking to get out of meeting new girls, Actual relationships, or just some quick flings?

I think that the places that you are looking to meet these girls is important. You ever see Superbad when they are talking about going to markets and stuff to meet nice girls? Well I'm about your age and I prefer that over going to bars to meet girls. Not that I go to the supermarket for that purpose, but when I'm there I keep my eyes peeled.
 
Even if you can't lose weight, you can gain muscle. Work out. Graduate from fat to husky. Nobody minds husky.
 
If it bothers you enough then you should make a lifestyle change to lose weight. Most girls wont want to be with a guy that big regardless of how stable or personable you are. Once you get in a routine of exercise it becomes more enjoyable than you would think.

A good friend of mine was a lot like you are now about 18 months ago. He has since lost 100 lbs, looks great and is in a stable relationship after being single for ages. Starting exercise will help you with confidence as much as it will with looks, it is the one surefire way to get what you want.
 
OP, your 'stats' aren't that bad. I have a question though. What are you looking to get out of meeting new girls, Actual relationships, or just some quick flings?

I think that the places that you are looking to meet these girls is important. You ever see Superbad when they are talking about going to markets and stuff to meet nice girls? Well I'm about your age and I prefer that over going to bars to meet girls. Not that I go to the supermarket for that purpose, but when I'm there I keep my eyes peeled.

Honestly, either one. If its the right girl, I want a long term relationship. I am not going to turn down a fling if thats all it is though. Beggars cant be choosers.
 
why don't you try going for a girl your own weight, then you wouldn't have to lose any weight.

Average guy is like 200 pounds, a 200 pound girl would be pretty fat.

I wouldn't mind a bigger girl, but within reason.
 
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