I'm 37 and have been using MDMA since 1994 - a pretty long time. I honestly think, to a certain degree that I've 'lost the magic' during the drought of the last few years I've been (quite heavily at times) been into the 'drone and seem to have never been able to get the same feeling from MDMA since taking that stuff, until in Space in Ibiza in September where we scored some crystal - it nearly put me on my arse! It was great, but still didn't get the stimulant push I was looking for. I almost feel like my brain isn't capable of feeling like it used to in the 90s somehow - can't quite explain it, still love the drone though for house parties - maybe my tastes have changed?
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Older rollers
- Thread starter georgewc2001
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I.m 48, still use MDMA around 3 times a year. Still feels special. Mostly take it at home with my girl, but every now and then it's good to go to a party.
I find if you keep it special and not routine it doesn't let you down, but if you do the same thing each time it does lose magic.
Can't really see a time when it's not in my life
I find if you keep it special and not routine it doesn't let you down, but if you do the same thing each time it does lose magic.
Can't really see a time when it's not in my life
Ringfinger
Bluelighter
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- 687
Question for you older rollers, do you think that your MDMA use has diminished your cognitive abilities or prevented you from excelling in your career? I'm not talking about the week after use, I mean overall over longer periods of time.
georgewc2001
Bluelighter
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Nope...not in the long run. If i'm just coming off a binge, i'll have some trouble paying attention sometimes or may have some minor memory issues like forgetting words or something but this goes away.
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Hard to tell as it's not just 20 years of MDMA use I've got under my belt, but booze, weed, coke, drone, LSD, speed, ket. However I will concede that I think MDMA seem like it actually messes with your actual brain and its chemistry more than the rest on that list
augustaB
Bluelighter
No I don't think MDMA use has affected my cognitive abilities, although there might be effect on memory retrieval. As for excelling at my career question, I don't think I'd have bothered with mdma if excelling in my career was a primary goal in my life.
georgewc2001
Bluelighter
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LOLOL...I fuckin love it and, for that matter, I hate the word career.
webguy
Bluelighter
No one (obviously) truly knows how their current level of cognitive ability compares to their earlier life, or to where they would have been had they avoided drugs in general, or ecstasy in particular. After 15 years of moderate ecstasy use, however, I see no long term changes in me or in my group of friends who do it with me. After about age 35, life patterns are pretty well set: a productive person will remain so; a lazy and unmotivated person will likely remain lazy. I didn't start using it until my mid 40s, by which time my career already was running on autopilot. Actually, by objective measures, I have been somewhat more productive in the years since I started using ecstasy. But there is no way of knowing if that increase was what would have happened anyway, or is the result of a better attitude once I took E.
I would say to some of the posters here, those who deride the thought of having a career, or of working hard at anything, that that attitude is entirely separate from using E, or not using E. Everyone makes choices in how they approach life, users and non-users alike. Pleasure-seeking and fulfillment through engagement in meaningful activities are two separate spheres of life. To keep life in balance, I value doing both. Others may opt for a different mix. That's their choice.
I would say to some of the posters here, those who deride the thought of having a career, or of working hard at anything, that that attitude is entirely separate from using E, or not using E. Everyone makes choices in how they approach life, users and non-users alike. Pleasure-seeking and fulfillment through engagement in meaningful activities are two separate spheres of life. To keep life in balance, I value doing both. Others may opt for a different mix. That's their choice.
Well said. Agreed!
sm7125
Greenlighter
^This is brilliant. The myth of work/life balance throws many off. Work and life are not different, nor separate. The reason many (if not most) people are unhappy (or unfulfilled) is that they spend 80% of their time while awake to "work" so they can enjoy 20% of their "life". They are literally living to work. Turning that on it's head, and working to live changes the game. And following what you are passionate about (where you find fun) is key.
Nice job Squareroot.
I've often wished we all lived in a relatively close area! How great would it be to do an annual cruise or meet-up or something?!?
I fantasize about organizing something like this with my friends constantly.
You find this great thing when you're younger (for me anyway) and as you grow older and mature you can't find many people to enjoy it with anymore (certainly can't openly ask around) or those who would want to haven't really matured themselves and aren't people you want to spend much time with anymore . . .
Ah well there's always the internebs and BL boards
yeah, finally a thread that makes me feel at home. just turned 40 and was already wondering if I'm the only roller left in that age.
all my friends from back in the 90ties are pretty straight these days (or on coke), but I still love rolling sooooo much. have not had the chance for many years but just came across some beautiful crystal mdma a few month ago.(got to be lucky sometimes
woooow, what a treat that was/ is.
Thinking about introducing my wife to it (she never did drugs - except pot), so it's kind of a gamble as I'm not sure how she will react to my idea.
But I would really like to explore mdma on a new level and it seems like it might be very beneficial to a relationship.
Anyways - thanks for the thread - I feel much better now
Really happy to find some older rollers here.
all my friends from back in the 90ties are pretty straight these days (or on coke), but I still love rolling sooooo much. have not had the chance for many years but just came across some beautiful crystal mdma a few month ago.(got to be lucky sometimes
woooow, what a treat that was/ is. Thinking about introducing my wife to it (she never did drugs - except pot), so it's kind of a gamble as I'm not sure how she will react to my idea.
But I would really like to explore mdma on a new level and it seems like it might be very beneficial to a relationship.
Anyways - thanks for the thread - I feel much better now
Really happy to find some older rollers here.
georgewc2001
Bluelighter
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- Aug 11, 2010
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Haha...thought this thread was done...always glad to hear there's more older rollers like myself out there! Congrats on the crystal! I'm sure your wife would LOVE it...could be a great way to ring in the New Year ;-)
slip29
Greenlighter
Hi George.
I think I know how you feel - I'm 53.
I was introduced to mdma just four months ago. So, I never went through the crazy party/antics phase. When I was in my 20s and 30s, I was *extremely* focused on raising our children (best thing ever in my life!), and building my career (wasted far too much time and energy on this).
For a while, I wondered, How come I'm interested in trying this, and my contemporaries wouldn't even entertain the thought? Is there something wrong with me?
But, then I realized, it isn't just an mdma thing. In the past couple years, now that our kids are grown and there's more time, I've learned sailing, I've learned jiu-jitsu, I've learned windsurfing, I took a class on poker startegy (VERY interesting!), I participated in my first ever race (running), I took part in a Warrior Dash, I took a course in handgun safety and care (assembly/disassembly), etc. - later this winter I hope to take up skiing again, I'm going to try rock climbing for the first time, a guy I work with has said he'd try whitewater rafting with me, and my wife still owes me taking a tennis class with me. Whereas my contemporaries are still killing themselves on the job, and admit all they do after work is pretty much go home and.... watch TV.Yikes.
So, I've come to accept that I'm different from most - and my friends tease me about my antics (although they have no idea about the mdma thing!), but I don't care.
I don't think there's anything wrong with me that I like mdma - or that I like these other activities/hobbies. I want to keep liking them. I'm comfortable not being like the stereotype people have constructed for me.
well said squarerootof23
wwendy104
Bluelighter
i agree i'm 38. am not gonna stop till i can't swallow. a vice is a vice i have friends that can't keep a wife. i think this is much easier to manage now that i'm older
webguy
Bluelighter
Notice the dates on the recent posts on this topic. A lot of older rollers are writing about E on NYE. They're not TAKING it on NYE, but writing about it on NYE.
I think this points up how disconnected many older rollers are from a scene where they could be partying on the biggest party night of the year. And that's a little sad.
But, maybe, I am just seeing their sadness because it's four days after I danced, and danced.
I think this points up how disconnected many older rollers are from a scene where they could be partying on the biggest party night of the year. And that's a little sad.
But, maybe, I am just seeing their sadness because it's four days after I danced, and danced.
I would have loved to have. . . unfortunately prior responsibilities, life, etc just didn't let it happen. Not to worry. . . It's been plenty of time since my last adventure as soon as I can get all the pieces to fall together I should be golden.
I gotta say I do find myself getting excited when I know an adventure is coming up soon but I really find I don't obsess about it during the times between. Not to say it doesn't cross my mind but honestly I didn't really feel like I was missing out on NYE when I wasn't able to get things arranged well enough to be able to enjoy it. That being said I've had more than my share of epic parties in my time and NYE hasn't ever really been especially epic for me personally in the past so it could be that my expectations for it haven't ever really been extreme.
I gotta say I do find myself getting excited when I know an adventure is coming up soon but I really find I don't obsess about it during the times between. Not to say it doesn't cross my mind but honestly I didn't really feel like I was missing out on NYE when I wasn't able to get things arranged well enough to be able to enjoy it. That being said I've had more than my share of epic parties in my time and NYE hasn't ever really been especially epic for me personally in the past so it could be that my expectations for it haven't ever really been extreme.
