help.....

snowboarder7791

Bluelighter
Joined
Jun 4, 2007
Messages
1,089
Location
wisconsin
im so sick of being sick and tired and lonley..i feel so empty that its sickning. just this shallow existence of what i like to call groundhogs day. honestly i am 34 and have accompished nothing. yes i have a job but that is jsut so i can pay the bills and sit at home by myself year after year. and its its been years since this has been going on. i do get out but its so rare and i have only a couple of friends but i rarley gt to hang out with them. i have helped out soooooo many people in the past but have always gotten screwed over. For years i guess i wished a single person helped me out when i needed it but it never happened. guess i had to take care it myself again....which made me moar depressed.I tired the whole thearpy thing but that never worked out. Honestly if it wasnt for my cat (which he might have to be put down soon which makes me even moar depressed cuz he is the only thing that i have connected with) and listening to deadmau5( yea im sure some of you are saying deadmau5 with your eyes rolling) i would be gone along time ago. but its getting harder and harder. i thought i was ok but i guess i was fooling my self. i am shaking... typing with one hand and my 9 in my other hand shaken so bad. crying my eyes out that the one thing i love in this world will be prob gone soon and i have nothing left. idk man..
 
im soo sorry if i made anyone feel bad... sooo sorry.. i wont disturb you guys anymoar... i went outside and threw out the bullets in the river. ill go now....so sorry again :(
 
:[ I'm sorry you feel that way and I'm glad you got rid of the bullets. i can relate to the loneliness and being alone at home everyday because i am that way too. and I'm so sorry about the kitty situation, I too might lose my cat soon who i love more then anything. i don't know how to give good advice so much, i hope you feel better soon. if you don't like the way your life is I'm sure you can find a way change it, it all just relies on your strength :/ i hope something happens soon that'll make you feel better <3
 
Honestly if you need someone to talk to, im here you can pm if you feel like it. I want to help. I know sort of how you feel, and it makes me sad that you feel this way. Please dont do anything rash.
 
@snowboarder hello mate, what a sad post that was. I am sorry you are feeling so bad but am pleased you didn't do anything silly and threw away yr bullets.
Have you any family members that you can talk to about how you feel?
Remember things can always get better and they usually do somewhere down the line.
Keep on surviving mate, take care of yourself
 
was in the foster care system for years then adopted but i have always had this feeling that they did it for the money they recieved from the state. so the family thing is kinda a no go. Im so sorry guys.. i feel really bad now... i didnt mean to make anyone upset if i did.,,, again im sorry :(
 
im sorry guys.. i feel weird... i havent had someone ask me how i really was before in years........thank you...it was another day of sitting and my apt by myself and i jsut lost it....esp thinking about my charlie...
 
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i am going to go for a walk cuz if i stay in this apt any longer ill go crazy.... i guess there are some people who do care its jsut been a really really long time since i really talked to any. having a conversation somewhat...thank you ceramic cat and esp thank you Sappy_6794... god i feel like a loser and weak for causing a rift ...
 
That's a good idea-- a walk will do you well. When I isolate myself, which is happening more often than I'd like of late, if I can force myself to leave my home for a bit I generally feel better. Not always, but usually.

CC's right: no need to apologize snowboarder. We're here to listen, and help in whatever way we can. I can sympathize with you; some aspects of your story parallel my own. If I may ask: what therapeutic methods have you tried? Often it takes a bit of trial and error before finding one that works. It is certainly worth the work though-- you can get over this!

Did the walk help any?
 
That's a good idea-- a walk will do you well. When I isolate myself, which is happening more often than I'd like of late, if I can force myself to leave my home for a bit I generally feel better. Not always, but usually.

CC's right: no need to apologize snowboarder. We're here to listen, and help in whatever way we can. I can sympathize with you; some aspects of your story parallel my own. If I may ask: what therapeutic methods have you tried? Often it takes a bit of trial and error before finding one that works. It is certainly worth the work though-- you can get over this!

Did the walk help any?

yea a little... kinda cold here for a walk (28 f ) but i forced myself to. i listened to the 3 songs that centered me the past couple of years.... helped a little.
 
That's good. Little helps add up over time.

Heh, 28F, that's what, maybe -5 C. It got down to about -27 over the weekend here. :)
 
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