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  • TDS Moderators: AlphaMethylPhenyl | paranoid android

Do you over think?

Survival0200

Survival0200

Bluelighter
Joined
Dec 27, 2005
Messages
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Lonely place in silence
I personally have a problem of over thinking issues. It's pretty much constant - there always some matter, that makes me think over and over again the same thing. And after I have thought through issue 1, I move to issue 2, issue 3 and so on. It would be nice if I could just live this moment, without thinking of the past or the future. Also social situations bother me quite a lot: did I insult someone, did I say something wrong, what people think of me if I do this or that and so on. I have an antipsychotic medication and an SSRI, but they don't seem to help. I just wanted to ask if other people have the same kind of issue, and how do you deal with it, or have you been able to get over it? Thanks a lot for your response.
 
i used to be like that for awhile when i was younger, and smoking cannabis made it worse. also stimulant come downs. the older ive gotten the less i give a shit, i dont seem to over anaylize things anymore. too much time wasted dwelling on the past etc
 
This is not what I would call strictly over thinking. It seems your self esteem is low enough to make you doubt yourself excessively. You gotta work in your selfimage. Do your friends get offended a lot by what you say, if not, practice continuing talking, or very close listening. After you finish speaking, from the heart (not designing sentence structure inside before saying it) immerse yourself in thought about their response, not doubts about whether it was unacceptable.

lateralus; "over thinking, over analyzing, separates my body from my mind, withering my intuition, missing opportunities"

Grow that intuition in speaking! Trust yourself. Your probably tactful from always analyzing your speech, it's VERY unlikely you will say something 'unwelcome.' Once you realize this, you should focus on that fact and use it to build your self confidence.
 
I think everyone suffers from this to a degree. It is not possible to be thinking of nothing.. you are always thinking, it is what we're designed to do, to resolve problems based upon previous experience and future expectations. When it comes to social situations, I know exactly how you feel.. it is anxiety, you become anxious because of some past experience/s and then your senses become heightened as your prepare to fight/flight. As a result you also notice your thought stream and tend to induce a negative feedback loop as your mood of fear (+hormones) are quite powerful, causing more negative thoughts.

I would spend some time thinking back in your history to see where your anxiety originates from, that tends to help neutralize it on a mental level. As for constantly over-thinking, if you spend a lot of time infront of a TV or computer screen I would try to reduce that time and spend more time in a naturally lit setting (ie outdoors), get more exercise, get enough sleep, stop any drugs (not medication) etc. If you're honest with yourself you'll probably be able to pinpoint the activities and behaviours that lead you to constantly engaging in the over-thinking cycle.
 
^--totally agree

It's probably universal, just varying degrees. There may be a few who never think about what they say, they probably aren't hard to spot. I'm much more likely to think about what I am saying with people I know less than close friends. I know they're my friends and still continue that way no matter what I blather.

Do you question yourself around close friends or unfamiliar people?

Circular thoughts can be annoying, the only thing to stop it is confidence that even if you made the wrong choice you're smart enough to fix it. Since you're incredibly introspective you've got a pretty damn good head start
 
ColtDan said:
does he do drugs?
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The only two people I know who analyzed themselves and others to the point of paranoia, one was bipolar, one was psychotic, and they both used.

The bipolar one was exceedingly lacking confidence. It was so bad to the point of not talking to him for two days, not purposely ignoring him, would draw accusations of failed friendship. So damn annoying.

The one with psychotic tendency would analyze body position of others and draw conclusions as if they were significant gestures. This type of delusion is well documented, I forget the particular name. So just remember no matter how much you think your reading into stuff, it goes crazy (literally) farther.
 
wtf. thats kinda like what i get like on mephedrone come downs sometimes. jumping and assuming unrational mild paranoid delusions/conclusions. thank fuck i stopped doing it. brings out some messed up self image and self esteem,
 
ScarlettBlaze said:
Yes, but he's always been that way. Sober or not.

It annoys the fuck out of me because if we have a fight or are arguing or something he will remember every single thing I say pretty much word for word since he replays it over and over so he can analyze it completely. Generally when he overthinks something like that he looks into it too deeply and ends up interpreting it so it means something completely different than what I actually did say.
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Have made it clear to him that he's your boyfriend and you have no will or motive to obscure what you're saying under intricately nuanced grammatical tricks? Sometimes it might click, or he might blow it off obsessed that you mean more than you're saying.

Do you make use of intense body language? This can be read by humans naturally from experience, and if it contradicts what you say it feels like deception. Humans can easily discern a forced smile from genuine. It's extremely difficult to move the muscles which portray a genuine smile. We do so much information sending and receiving we are not aware of. Maybe try and be concious of any overt body movement during heated discussion? I dunno just a shot at some thought on it.

ColtDan said:
wtf. thats kinda like what i get like on mephedrone come downs sometimes. jumping and assuming unrational mild paranoid delusions/conclusions. thank fuck i stopped doing it. brings out some messed up self image and self esteem,
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Stimulants are capable of causing mind blowing paranoia. The only paranoid delusions I have had were from them. 4am threatening shadow people under clothes in the back seat of my car with a 30-30 rifle. So glad I didn't get seen, and go to jail, that would have been a mess.
 
TheMiddleWay said:
We do so much information sending and receiving we are not aware of.
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very, very true. it would be interesting to get secretly filmed one day and watch it back to see how we behave, and how we could improve. i bet if i watched myself my opinion of myself would change massively. could see my flaws, the way i potray myself, everything. id be scared to watch it though
 
I have aaalways over analysed and thought about everything all the time, and i'm also very anxious in social situations (general/social anxiety disorder), and am also on an anti-psychotic and an SSRI. For me my depression/mood swings/anxiety/etc are still a work in progress to treat medically, but these medications have helped me. If you're on an SSRI like sertraline like me, then it will take time to do what its going to do to help you. The other med i'm on is seroquel. When I say they've helped me, I have only recently started to question the sertraline after a year of being on it, as it feels like it is starting to lack its benefits.

Recently I am starting to wonder whether I am bipolar. I have been diagnosed with depression, general anxiety disorder, and social anxiety. But my changing mood, feelings, and thoughts, etc. are starting to worry me a bit again. So now it is constant thinking about the way I am thinking, haha. Its driving me nuts.

But, yeah on the "thinking" thing, my parents, girlfriend, everyone has told me I "over analyse" everything and tell me to not bother thinking about things i'm thinking, etc. I think we all do this to a certain point, but some of us do do it too much and I don't think its very healthy in the long term.
 
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ColtDan said:
very, very true. it would be interesting to get secretly filmed one day and watch it back to see how we behave, and how we could improve. i bet if i watched myself my opinion of myself would change massively. could see my flaws, the way i potray myself, everything. id be scared to watch it though
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yeah! Theres no way i'd be watching myself lol
 
ScarlettBlaze said:
He knows I don't pull that mind game shit. He's just, like you said, obsessed with reading between the lines. No problems with body language. We have our ups and downs with communication but generally we don't use "intense" body language. Mainly my body language during these times consists of crossing my arms(defensive, i know), tearing up, and sometimes foot/leg shaking.

Sometimes when things get really heated, the situation can become violent fast. We have similar personalities and are both very stubborn.
We are working on calmly sitting down and talking to each other about what we are having problems with, how we feel about it, and what to do to fix it. When things aren't blown out of proportion we are very good at this. But he has anger problems and often makes a huge deal over something totally stupid and a waste of time. (Example: a recent violent fight we had was because he got mad that I asked a "stupid" question.)
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Oh damn, you two are physically fighting? You've both got to just stop and take a few breathes. hitting each other is just going to undermine your solidarity and make managing these issues more problematic.
ColtDan said:
very, very true. it would be interesting to get secretly filmed one day and watch it back to see how we behave, and how we could improve. i bet if i watched myself my opinion of myself would change massively. could see my flaws, the way i potray myself, everything. id be scared to watch it though
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Cool idea, personal candid camera : D I've always prided myself in being able to maintain a calming open posture and soft voice while talking to people about sensitive issues. I never dismiss or minimize concerns but rather try and point out other views. I think this reason is why my friends are usually open with me about their problems. Your explaining to me your paranoid delusions, that's fine, they are indeed very real no matter how absurd they are. My friend once asked me if I had snuck his girlfriend into my house while he was at work (I met her the first time the previous night). One of the few times I had to insist it was a complete delusion. My god, I don't have the personality to be under handed crazy like that.
fivelinefury said:
I have aaalways over analysed and thought about everything all the time, and i'm also very anxious in social situations (general/social anxiety disorder), and am also on an anti-psychotic and an SSRI. For me my depression/mood swings/anxiety/etc are still a work in progress to treat medically, but these medications have helped me. If you're on an SSRI like sertraline like me, then it will take time to do what its going to do to help you. The other med i'm on is seroquel. When I say they've helped me, I have only recently started to question the sertraline after a year of being on it, as it feels like it is starting to lack its benefits.

Recently I am starting to wonder whether I am bipolar. I have been diagnosed with depression, general anxiety disorder, and social anxiety. But my changing mood, feelings, and thoughts, etc. are starting to worry me a bit again. So now it is constant thinking about the way I am thinking, haha. Its driving me nuts.

But, yeah on the "thinking" thing, my parents, girlfriend, everyone has told me I "over analyse" everything and tell me to not bother thinking about things i'm thinking, etc. I think we all do this to a certain point, but some of us do do it too much and I don't think its very healthy in the long term.
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Analyzing things is good. Building it up 5 layers deep until your thinking about thinking about thinking about what you said while eating that sandwich yesterday is not.

I don't think this way, so I can't relate, I only know people who do, but that's a long shot from experience. Telling some one they're reading to deeply into stuff usually will not work. This is who you are, changing it is not easy. Have you talked to your therapist about these worries and circular thoughts?

I think they would have a bit more valuable things to say than my poor ability. I'm sure it would be beneficial to you to work out why you think this way. How does it benefit you? Security? Obsession with comprehension of matters at hand? lack of confidence?
 
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^ haha yeah exactly, on the sandwich part. On the last bit, I certainly lack confidence/self esteem. Have been like that all my life. I haven't seen a therapist for about 6 months or something now, but have a doctors appointment next month, and i'd say he'll probably refer me again.
 
fivelinefury said:
^ haha yeah exactly, on the sandwich part. On the last bit, I certainly lack confidence/self esteem. Have been like that all my life. I haven't seen a therapist for about 6 months or something now, but have a doctors appointment next month, and i'd say he'll probably refer me again.
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Self confidence is tricky business, if you're over confident and go beyond your comfort zone it had the potential to mess with you, but too little is possibly more samsung then too much. Your not alone there, some of the most clever people I know would never admit that they are so damn intelligent because they lack the ability to feel confident. I think it has very much to do with the over thinking quality that turns thoughts inside and makes you a thoughtful introvert. Too much isn't good though, because you're mott utilizing this tact you clearly possess. Talking to a therapist openly in a safe environment where no judgment is ever passed may help you transfer this ability to practice.

Also, if you're on, two different psychiatric medications you should probably see a mental heath professional more then every six months. :-) if it is indeed helping you can use it to talk in the safe environment mentioned.
 
^ Yeah ur right there! I was supposed to go back to see my psyc a while ago but didn't because I was starting to feel better at the time, and kinda put it off 8)
 
I do this a lot. I've never been to a therapist and I've never been on any medication. I've been addicted to drugs and I continue to abuse them, but in a much more functional manner than when I was addicted. I have problems with self confidence, but this issue has become less severe as I am growing older (I am 23).

The only advice I can give you is to follow your heart and interact with people who you are really comfortable with. I found that I tend to over-analyze things because I suppress certain feelings and thoughts due to my desire to please people and avoid confrontations. This is a very bad habit. Be honest with yourself and only be around people who are not going to bothered by the things you say. They are definitely out there. Everyone else: they can go fuck themselves. :)
 
Survival0200 said:
I went to do some grocery shopping today - just to get my thoughts off everything I'm thinking when I'm sitting home. Well, it helped! :)
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Good strategy! and glad it helped. I go in and out of overthinking. It is definitely anxiety that makes me overthink so any therapy that addresses those kind of anxious thought patterns will help. Mindfulness training for me has been the most helpful for over thinking and just about everything else in my life!
 
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