Need to rant about my asshole doctor and my condition

painenduser

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 13, 2011
Messages
404
Location
NJ
Hey guys, I just need to vent this out. As some of you know about me, I have end stage liver disease, and my GI Dr wants me to goto the university hospital north of where I live to see about getting a liver transplant. Now, I am currently on welfare and medicaid. 2 years ago when I was first diagnosed, I wasn't expected to make it out of the hospital as I was in full renal failure, and was in and out of a heptic coma, and the Doctors, told my mother that she should begin trying to make arrangements for my final time on this earth. Now mind you that was 2 years ago and while some of my organs have recovered fully, my liver is completely shot and has just enough left to allow me to live through my day to day routines. My spleen is also permanently damaged. My immune system is shot due to the damage in my liver and spleen and I live in constant pain.

So a few weeks ago, I went to the medical clinic I go to for my referrals out to my specialists (like my GI Dr dealing with my liver and spleen) and they are the ones who are supposed to act as my primary care Dr. Since I do not have insurance and I only have charity care for my medical I can only see the doctors that the hospital covers under the charity care. Now it's quite clear from what I have mentioned about my condition that I will more then likely never be able to work again as I am usually very sick due to the compromised immune system and the fact that I am always exhausted because my liver can not deal with the toxins fast enough and it's not producing all the enzymes in the amounts it should be for normal survival.

Well to continue to get my welfare benefits which is a measly $215 a month I have to have the doctor fill out, sign, and fax some paper work showing that I am medically needing of the money, with out the papers signed I only get $125 a month. The paper would allow me to get the full $215, however, when I brought the paper work into the originally, the Dr said right to my face, "I don't fill those paper" and he said it very arrogantly, it felt as if he was telling me to go fuck off he's not signing it. I left the office that day explaining my situation to the nurse that works in the clinic and told her the deal that I need the Dr to fill out and sign so that I can get my tiny bit of extra money which is used for paying for other non charity care covers medical visit and she said not to worry we'll take care of it for you.

So I still hadn't heard from them and the money was not in my account, so I called them twice already and they told me, the Dr has it, and we will get it taken care of ASAP. I called them this morning to ask them what the hold up was, the lady talked to the Dr and she told me that the Dr refuses to fill out the paper work as he says I'm not disabled and he is refusing to sign the papers.... I'm sorry did I miss something here? I need a new liver, I am constantly being admitted into the hospital in serious condition, infact I just came home last week from a week in the same hospital this Dr is in. But with everything going on with me he is refusing to let me get that $100 more per month that in my situation would be a god send right now... Basically when I talked to them this morning they pretty much made it sound like since he is the Dr he is god and if he doesn't want to fill it out, noone can force him to. And while I can understand that it is his signature and his license behind that signature, I find it astonishing that he is being such a prick that he won't sign the papers! It's not like I'm trying to milk the system or anything, I paid into all the state social security, and state disability taxes through all my working life which has been since I was 15, and I'm 37 now (35 when I was diagnosed) . I'm doing nothing wrong, just trying to claim what little money I can get while I have no income, my house is in foreclosure, I am so bad off from being so sick, I can't even afford to get a bankruptcy filed. And now this asshole, WHO, mind you, has only seen me ONCE! WTF! I mean seriously what the fuck is wrong with this picture... You know if I were the Dr and I saw that my patient was seriously sick or maybe not terminal, but needed the welfare money, I probably would just sign the papers out of the goodness of my heart. I mean as I said, I'm not trying to buck the system or anything, I am seriously sick and seriously in need of that little bit of money and because of this Dr's arrogance, I am being denied a simple benefit that could help my family substantially. This money is highly important to me for things like some meds that are not covered by my medicaid and help give my parents some money for gas to take me to all my appointments and they are living off my step fathers pension which since the market crash in 2008 has become worthless. Our family has nothing, and this Dr is being an asshole and because of that we are struggling to get by right now.

I mean this has me so upset I have nightmares about this shit every night, I feel like I'm in a box and noone will open the lid for me to get out. I mean I am stressed enough knowing that if I do not get the transplant, well to be frank about it, I will die and pretty soon with out it. My brain and my emotions really can't take to much more of this. Sometimes I sit here wishing that if noone will open the box, then lets get it over with and cremate the box with me inside.... The pain in my nickname doesn't just refer to physical pain, but the emotional pain I have to deal with on a daily basis. Sometimes more often then not lately, I just want out, I just want out.

Well thanks for letting rant. I don't think I have the enery to cry over this anymore, something has to make the pain stop, and to be honest with you I do not care how it stops, I just want it to stop :(
 
I haven't read your previous posts and so I don't have a good understanding of your situation. But here's my advice just based on this post...

I'm not sure how easily it is for you to get near this doctor, face to face I mean. But if I were in your position, I would do everything I could to get near him and explain the situation. I wouldn't do it over a phone, I would physically go into the hospital/office. And I would try to put myself in a position where there are other patients, preferably ones whose emotions aren't deadened to these situations. I'm saying I would attempt to "make a scene" in front of this doctor with people nearby who would be most sympathetic. And in such a situation, if I'm feeling it enough, I might directly address people in the area. Kind of like.... if you've ever heard of the "bystander effect." It's where people in a crowd ignore something that's going on around them because they assume it's someone elses responsibility. So essentially everyone ignores the problem. Like if there's a guy dying on the streets of New York, people just walk by because they assume someone else will help, and the guy ends up dying on the street with people walking by. Anyways, to confront this problem you have to address individuals (strangers) directly and force them to get involved. If I were desperate enough, that's what I would do.

At the same time though, I wouldn't act like a maniac. I would be totally calm and reasonable, but stern and like I said, if I were desperate enough, I would involve other people, who may be sympathetic, in the situation.

Sending someone else to confront this doctor for you may be more convenient but then they can refuse that person because they aren't you.

The reality of working in the medical profession is that a lot of doctors are going to get really really cut off from the situations they're involved in everyday. The idea that doctors are supposed to be caring, sympathetic individuals is kind of a joke. Particularly in the hospital environment. They see so much awful shit that they can't possibly connect to all of it or they'll go insane. And so they develop the ability to wall themselves off from these emotions. It's this process that probably makes it so easy for your doctor to just say "fuck you." And move on with his day.

But it doesn't mean this behavior is acceptable. You have to be relentless but at the same time calm, collected and reasonable. And if the situation gets desperate enough, you should escalate your behavior to the point where you make a scene like what I talked about. A legitimate scene though that doesn't make you look like a crazy person.

There may be other ways for you to get money by the way. But unfortunately I'm not very well-versed in how all that works for someone in your position.

But I've seen tricks that can be played in order to get cash when you have a serious (or sometimes not) medical condition. I would only advocate something like that as an absolute last resort though. And I really hope you can sort this situation out with your doctor.
 
Contact the establishment in charge of granting you this money-idk where you live but here in the southeastern US they REQUEST a Doctor fill out the form and if that Doctor does not,social services sends you to a state assigned physician who-if you sign-has rights to all your previous medical charts and history. I went through a bit of this myself and I am in the final legal stage for Social Security Disability and Medicaid so I can receive the care I need and be able to afford ALL my monthly meds. I am 35 and living at home feeling like a financial burden on my parents. but I am lucky they are taking care of me-they just can't do it forever,
Report the guy to your agency-to the hospital. Again idk where you live but here in the US is something called "Patient Abandonment" and it is serious business. Maybe he was an intern an didn't have the power-in any case-fight back. Don't let it go-exhaust all your resources. Google your options-just plain ask for help. I am sorry for what you are going through/ It sucks-I KNOW. Let me know if I can help you- if you just need to talk. and keep us posted here in your thread. Support is a mighty weapon!!! :D
Much peace and love.............................skillz <3
 
This doctor hasn't committed an act of patient abandonment by refusing to sign a disability request form. My advice would be to make the request to the
doctor in writing, with all of the necessary documentation attached--that way if the State does become involved by appointing a physician to review the
OP's request, it's clear that a prior attempt was made.

I don't know why some doctors behave this way. Maybe they have seen people try to take advantage of the system. I do think that some doctors
forget just how much power they have on their patients.
 
Hey all just a quick update, and a note on some of you notes here... This form I need filled out is for Social Services, or based on the states welfare system. We are not even talking about the Social Security disability that of which got denied first time around and thats because they contacted all the wrong doctors, in fact I dont even knkow where they got my records from because they have all the wrong medical centers in the SSI sheet, but thats a story for another day..

This is just for welfare, they give you benefits based on what criteria you present them with. You can qualify for;

Food stamps: $230 /mo
Medcaid group G
Cash on hand: $125
Cash on hand for medical + $100 on top of the $125 cash on hand.

Well I have qualified for all of them, but then recently due to stricter regulations they are making things most difficult to get your cash benefit, however in order to get the extra cash on hand which is only an extra $100 a month (although in my case that $100 is a huge deal) there is a form that The Division of Social Services gives you that basically all the Dr has to to is sign his name stating that I am currently under his care medically while I am on welfare. That is the only thing that they require, just a dumb signature and that signature is the proof they need to show that I am "medically needy" so each month I would get $225 cash plus my other benefits.

So I do not know or understand what is up his ass that is making him tell me he is refusing to sign it. So I called the patient service department which deals with problem regarding the hospital and with all the BS problems I had with them when I was admitted last week, after I spoke with them just before 5PM (just after I started this thread) they told me that they would talk to my Dr tomorrow, and if he still refuses to fill it out, they are going to escalate it up to the chief Dr of the hospital. So let's just hope that this is all I will need to do to get this resolved, although I haven't the best of luck when it comes to these things. So according to them, I should hear back by tomorrow afternoon as to what is going to happen. I'll keep yall updated. Thanks for thinking about me, feel good to have the support! This is about the only place around here to get some excellent support. I guess because we all have some mutual emotions, feeling, ect. We have all for the most part seen the bottom of our own wells. It is nice to be able to have people around you to talk to. Thanks all, Ill let you know how tomorrow goes :)

Oh and yeah it's wouldn't be considered patient abandonment as he hasn't just up and refused to treat me with out providing me a competent replacement. He's just being a lazy as and doesn't want to do the paper work. He went so far as to say that I am not disabled which is BS, I have terminal liver disease in need of a freaking new liver, and I'm not disabled?? oiy....

As far as SSI, I am in the process of appealing the initial denial.
 
Have you looked into acessing a health advocate?

I am not even sure of what that is or how to get one, although I know that when filing for Social Security benefits, the hospital has a company that is not part of the hospital, but they work closely with the hospitals to help you apply and appeal for it as needed. The guy there told me that they are like Binder and Binder which is a firm that deals with strictly Social Security, again, what I am asking the Dr to fill out is a two page paper that says that I'm under his care and poof I get an extra $100 per month. I think a lot of you are confusing Social Services and Social Security. Social Services are state run programs for people who qualify for welfare which I do as I have not been able to work since I got sick. The social services covers my medicaid, food, and cash. Social Security is the Federally run program that pays out a set dollar amount each month based on your lifes work and if you accumulated the minimum amount of "points" in a ten year period.

As far as the patient advocate goes, they help with Social Security and they are working with me and social security, but I am not sure if there is anyone who can help with the social services aspect. However like I mentioned earlier, I have to wait until tomorrow to see if the prick changes his mind with some pressure from his superiors. So I hope this helps clear somethings up a bit.
 
wow, you have so much on your plate, I feel for you. Did you ever consider coming to Canada....we have lots of faults in our system but I think you could potentially get much better care! Best of luck


Hey guys, I just need to vent this out. As some of you know about me, I have end stage liver disease, and my GI Dr wants me to goto the university hospital north of where I live to see about getting a liver transplant. Now, I am currently on welfare and medicaid. 2 years ago when I was first diagnosed, I wasn't expected to make it out of the hospital as I was in full renal failure, and was in and out of a heptic coma, and the Doctors, told my mother that she should begin trying to make arrangements for my final time on this earth. Now mind you that was 2 years ago and while some of my organs have recovered fully, my liver is completely shot and has just enough left to allow me to live through my day to day routines. My spleen is also permanently damaged. My immune system is shot due to the damage in my liver and spleen and I live in constant pain.

So a few weeks ago, I went to the medical clinic I go to for my referrals out to my specialists (like my GI Dr dealing with my liver and spleen) and they are the ones who are supposed to act as my primary care Dr. Since I do not have insurance and I only have charity care for my medical I can only see the doctors that the hospital covers under the charity care. Now it's quite clear from what I have mentioned about my condition that I will more then likely never be able to work again as I am usually very sick due to the compromised immune system and the fact that I am always exhausted because my liver can not deal with the toxins fast enough and it's not producing all the enzymes in the amounts it should be for normal survival.

Well to continue to get my welfare benefits which is a measly $215 a month I have to have the doctor fill out, sign, and fax some paper work showing that I am medically needing of the money, with out the papers signed I only get $125 a month. The paper would allow me to get the full $215, however, when I brought the paper work into the originally, the Dr said right to my face, "I don't fill those paper" and he said it very arrogantly, it felt as if he was telling me to go fuck off he's not signing it. I left the office that day explaining my situation to the nurse that works in the clinic and told her the deal that I need the Dr to fill out and sign so that I can get my tiny bit of extra money which is used for paying for other non charity care covers medical visit and she said not to worry we'll take care of it for you.

So I still hadn't heard from them and the money was not in my account, so I called them twice already and they told me, the Dr has it, and we will get it taken care of ASAP. I called them this morning to ask them what the hold up was, the lady talked to the Dr and she told me that the Dr refuses to fill out the paper work as he says I'm not disabled and he is refusing to sign the papers.... I'm sorry did I miss something here? I need a new liver, I am constantly being admitted into the hospital in serious condition, infact I just came home last week from a week in the same hospital this Dr is in. But with everything going on with me he is refusing to let me get that $100 more per month that in my situation would be a god send right now... Basically when I talked to them this morning they pretty much made it sound like since he is the Dr he is god and if he doesn't want to fill it out, noone can force him to. And while I can understand that it is his signature and his license behind that signature, I find it astonishing that he is being such a prick that he won't sign the papers! It's not like I'm trying to milk the system or anything, I paid into all the state social security, and state disability taxes through all my working life which has been since I was 15, and I'm 37 now (35 when I was diagnosed) . I'm doing nothing wrong, just trying to claim what little money I can get while I have no income, my house is in foreclosure, I am so bad off from being so sick, I can't even afford to get a bankruptcy filed. And now this asshole, WHO, mind you, has only seen me ONCE! WTF! I mean seriously what the fuck is wrong with this picture... You know if I were the Dr and I saw that my patient was seriously sick or maybe not terminal, but needed the welfare money, I probably would just sign the papers out of the goodness of my heart. I mean as I said, I'm not trying to buck the system or anything, I am seriously sick and seriously in need of that little bit of money and because of this Dr's arrogance, I am being denied a simple benefit that could help my family substantially. This money is highly important to me for things like some meds that are not covered by my medicaid and help give my parents some money for gas to take me to all my appointments and they are living off my step fathers pension which since the market crash in 2008 has become worthless. Our family has nothing, and this Dr is being an asshole and because of that we are struggling to get by right now.

I mean this has me so upset I have nightmares about this shit every night, I feel like I'm in a box and noone will open the lid for me to get out. I mean I am stressed enough knowing that if I do not get the transplant, well to be frank about it, I will die and pretty soon with out it. My brain and my emotions really can't take to much more of this. Sometimes I sit here wishing that if noone will open the box, then lets get it over with and cremate the box with me inside.... The pain in my nickname doesn't just refer to physical pain, but the emotional pain I have to deal with on a daily basis. Sometimes more often then not lately, I just want out, I just want out.

Well thanks for letting rant. I don't think I have the enery to cry over this anymore, something has to make the pain stop, and to be honest with you I do not care how it stops, I just want it to stop :(
 
I am not even sure of what that is or how to get one, although I know that when filing for Social Security benefits, the hospital has a company that is not part of the hospital, but they work closely with the hospitals to help you apply and appeal for it as needed. The guy there told me that they are like Binder and Binder which is a firm that deals with strictly Social Security, again, what I am asking the Dr to fill out is a two page paper that says that I'm under his care and poof I get an extra $100 per month. I think a lot of you are confusing Social Services and Social Security. Social Services are state run programs for people who qualify for welfare which I do as I have not been able to work since I got sick. The social services covers my medicaid, food, and cash. Social Security is the Federally run program that pays out a set dollar amount each month based on your lifes work and if you accumulated the minimum amount of "points" in a ten year period.

As far as the patient advocate goes, they help with Social Security and they are working with me and social security, but I am not sure if there is anyone who can help with the social services aspect. However like I mentioned earlier, I have to wait until tomorrow to see if the prick changes his mind with some pressure from his superiors. So I hope this helps clear somethings up a bit.

yeah i dont know how thing work in the states, but here there are independent health advocates that help you sort out shit between you and your doctor when there is conflict/a breach of your rights as a health consumer. try googleing it?
 
Top