The psychedelic state has always felt like coming home to me. Existing in a state that I want to, filled with wisdom, wonder, and brilliance. Being able to perceive difficult things in a slanted abstract way not normally or easily available. Really I love basically everything about it.
I 100% agree with this sentiment...the only times I've ever felt as home as I do on high doses of psychedelics is on high doses of dissociatives, but those aren't "good" like psychedelics. Anyways, I have numerous reasons for taking psychedelics, all of which tie into each other. They basically act as a medicine of sorts, the therapeutic benefits of (balanced) psychedelic use are astounding, every time I trip it acts as a sort of emotional/spiritual cleanser, and tripping semi-regularly (once a month or so) feels like it "fixes" something wrong in my brain. Related to that, of course there are the awe inspiring insights/lessons, NOTHING has ever allowed me to so drastically shift my perspective the way I have on certain trips. Naturally I'm a pretty negative, pessimistic person, but psychedelics allow me to "see the light" & think in much more positive ways, which also helps me be much more productive, much less destructive.
It's great that the experience is so unique each time as well, you never step in the same stream twice, my sober mind is always evolving & changing, so my psychedelic mind is as well. Even with all the experience I have, it still maintains that exploratory aspect, as long as I'm smart about how often I dose it's always fresh & magical as ever! As well I simply feel a sort of "calling" to explore the psychedelic realm, like the only other thing I feel such a powerful "need" to do, the only thing that feeds my whole being in a similar way, is making music (& exploring the music I listen to)...much of this world, human society, it just doesn't make any sense to me, it doesn't really mean much to me, but making music & exploring the psychedelic realms within my mind, that's what's REAL to me, that's what makes me feel truly ALIVE, that's what makes life worthwhile.
I sort of feel a connection to "shamanism", except I'm not coming at it from any sort of traditionalist perspective, certainly not any religious one (religion is one of the fakest things there is to me), I come at it from the culture & perspective of a pot smoking white boy music nerd, it's not "religious", but it's my own way of living, a balance between hedonistic silliness & the more serious side of wanting to know the truth. There's also an almost scientific side to my psychedelic use, I want to get to know & explore each & every corner of the experience.
