What is the worst drug to have withdrawals from?

[MagickalKat777]

Does anyone actually successfully recover from benzos though? I mean... I was so close and it makes me mad that she fucked it up by putting me on carbamazepine when I TOLD HER it would clear my Valium faster... So she bumped me from 5 to 10 with the script and sent me on my way and now I'm back to fucking 20 (where I started) and pissed. Does it not say in the manual to not add drugs, to not increase dose? I mean... I actually tried to be med compliant for once and get screwed.

 

[DamienSin]

Honestly I feel some people are just fucked genetically and are born drug addicts..some may not never lose there virginity to a drug and avoid that fate. For me I was 19 years old..an up and coming boxer with a pair of golden glovesat 19. I was hit by a drunken driver..broke my back. .hips..pelvis...and many surgeries followed.My bright boxing career had ended while in its infancy. (Was signing with a major trainer and going pro within 3 months) Doctors gave me pill bottle after pill bottle. Before this incident I never even drank recreationally..no pot..no tobacco. Boy did things change with that first pill. Granted I needed them just to walk but my body and mind loved the pills from the start. Love at first site. Now here I am 21 years later..I do demolition work and construction. Im in pain management. .but my script lasts maybe a week due to my monster tolerance. I use H when I run out. If I never was hit by that car oh how things would have been different. I never would have discovered my bodys love/want for opiates. Ive quit many times for up to a year at a time but the pain and need to play withmy children...to be normal I threw away my sobriety. I do not feel the least bit sad or bad for myself...maybe some one can learn before its too late. Lastly ive used suboxone..the withdrawl from that made me pray for regular opiate withdrawal. Subs are not something that should be used long term in my experienced opinion.

 

[MagickalKat777]

Sorry to hear about your story man. For me... Mom was drinking, smoking, smoking pot, and doing coke when she was pregnant with me. Ironically I can't stand pot or coke but my step-dad used to smoke pot all the time with his friends and shit when my sis was a baby and I was like 7... Fucked up shit... Was already researching Erowid on my old school dial up when I was 16... Came back to CO when I was 17 and smoked pot the first time then I went to DXM then to research chemicals then everything else... Was on benzos for anxiety in 2004 as needed. Didn't need them often. Lung collapsed and I had surgery. They had me in a morphine drip which I was fine with but then they transitioned me over to vicoprofen. Well it gave me panic attacks so they gave me a xanax with each dose. 6 weeks I was taking 50-60mg of hydrocodone and 1.5-2mg Xanax. Went back to work and stopped all that shit and thought I was gonna die... Called the doc "oh you can't stop Xanax like that" - opiates were no problem, was done and over with... Benzos daily ever since. Now if they could have just put me on a morphine pill this never would have happened. It's obvious that thebaine derivatives are stimulating to me while morphine is not... Dumbasses! Then I get told I'm a fucking drug addict when they made me one!!!

 

[《Plasticity》]

^ Isn't it so fucking annoying when your shrugged off for correcting your doctor? It took me almost two months and nearly $10,000 (which I am in no position to pay off due to the fact that I can't work) to get a diagnosis of pulmonary embolism because the doctors would NOT listen to me.

I told them straight up like a thousand times, just because I have a clean chest X ray that doesn't mean all my issues are anxiety related, stop fucking sending me home and do a CT scan! Pulmonary embolism DOESN'T show on a chest x ray, only damage and scarring caused by massive embolisms will show. Apparently none of the doctors I spoke to knew this. I went back and forth between the hospital and cardiologist for months because I was, essentially, suffocating in my own body every day but no... EKG and chest x ray is fine and you have a diagnosis for anxiety therefore this is all in your head 8).

Ahhhh, this gets me so heated thinking about doctors ignorance! Then I was labeled a drug seeker when I told them my right leg still hurt like hell (likely due to DVT) after getting shitty IV Toradol, which btw made my heart race and caused me to feel faint... On the chart, there was a remark that said "anxiety" and "drug user", which I can only assume that they think I have a scheme where I come into hospitals every time I have a panic attack and rack up debt just to get some painkillers for my leg, painkillers I can buy on the street... Then, when they finally listened to me and did a CT scan with contrast, what do you know... I have bilateral pulmonary embolism, and thousands of dollars of debt from unnecessary testing . Jesus, I hate dealing with medical professionals.
--------
Sorry, went a little off topic there... on topic, I have to agree that GABA withdrawals are misery, especially if you have anxiety to begin with. Phenibut withdrawal sucked balls and etizolam withdrawal was horrendous. Thanks to the hospital insisting my problems were from anxiety and getting dosed with small doses of ativan, I STILL haven't recovered fully and it's been like 6 months, though I'm definitely past the acutes which were miserable and filled with extreme agoraphobia and paranoia. An overall disgusting feeling that blows opioid withdrawal out the water (kratom was my main staple, but I indulged in pharms and tar at least once a week).

MK, I have to ask though, why did you take the carbamazapine? Couldn't you just say you were taking it or was she actually piss testing you to make sure you were taking the meds?

 

[Phiddle Head]

MK, I have no horror story of my own, as I was raised in a Norman Rockwell. But I think your experience gives you the advantage. You've seen, nay lived, the true grit and know first hand the positive and negative. It still seems to me that you had one major bout with a terrible doctor when you were so close to being clean forever. If you can do it with Dr. Lousy then you can definitely do it for good with the right Dr.

 

[Phiddle Head]

Damn, Cap'n K, you got hooked up with some lousy medical help. I can't imagine your frustration. How's the new medical team working out?

 

[Phiddle Head]

Also, Cap'n K, tell me about the Gabapentin AWS. What dose, how long, what are the wds? I'm taking GABA now to alleviate tramadol wds but plan to stop soon. Am I heading for a worse withdrawal?

 

[《Plasticity》]

Sorry, should've clarified... when I said GABA withdrawals I was speaking of gaba-ergics in general. Haha, with that said I actually DO have experience with gabapentin withdrawal, but unfortunately it was in the midst of etizolam withdrawal so I could hardly tell what was doing what besides the fact that I felt like I had been dragged through hell by my balls.

I took gabapentin in doses of 1,200 to 2,400mgs for about three or so weeks and when I stopped I felt a strong increase in anxiety, far stronger than the initial anxiety from etiz, my skin felt like it was on fire, I was also very restless as if I were going into opioid withdrawal as well. I frequently hear it's withdrawal compared to a combination of benzo and opiate withdrawal, and while I was already going through etiz withdrawal, I would agree with whatever credibility I have. It sucked so bad but it passed within a week and I was back to my normal, etizolam induced misery. I've taken gabapentin for weeks at a time during opioid withdrawal plenty of times (works great huh?) and never had withdrawal, but it looks like this time I pushed my luck... at the worst possible time.

From what I read the withdrawals are really terrible in long term users, but there are also alot of people saying they can really push the envelope and not experience any withdrawals. I would imagine a combo of gabapentin and tramadol withdrawal would be terrible, so I would proceed with caution. No more that a week or two at a time and take small breaks is what I'll be doing from now on Good luck man, I hear tramadol withdrawal is pretty shitty due to it's SNRI activity.

And yes, I was totally mistreated and still am being tossed around. Now I have to go see a lung specialist... yippee!!!

 

[Phiddle Head]

Today is day 4 of tramadol withdrawal and I woke up feeling surprisingly good. I have had worse light beer hangovers. If this is all tramadol AWS has to offer then I can't complain. Compared to oxy AWS, coming off of tramadol is like a gentle hand job! I quit oxy cold turkey a few times, with doses ranging from 120 to 240 mgs. It was a living hell..... until this last time two weeks ago. I quit 120 mg cold turkey but had a script for 240 tramadol pills at 50 mgs. I took very high doses of tramadol (1500 to 2000 mgs.) a day and HAD ALMOST ZERO OXY AWS!!! I did feel a little shitty but I've had colds that felt worse. I know there is seizure risk when taking high doses but I've read that people who experience seizures when taking high doses already are seizure prone~ and even then it is still a minuscule chance. Personally, I was willing to risk a seizure to save me from the nightmare of oxy AWS. I told my doctor that I had quit the oxy ct a week ago and he was amazed~ said he'd never seen anyone self wean so quickly. (and I still had a full script for 90 of 40 mg. oxy) I just moved to this area so I had to get a new PCP and pain specialist, and the specialist was pushing gabapentin. I tried to explain that my goal was " no meds" not "different meds" but she insisted that gabapentin was non- narco, non- addictive, blah, blah so I filled the script. I used it for the first 2 nights and had the worst, restless sleep you can imagine so I quit taking it. Then I quit the tramadol ct and was not expecting such AWS. It's been shitty, but I have a very, very hard time believing that tramadol AWS is anywhere close to the agony of oxy AWS. But it was still lousy, and I read on Blue Light that gabapentin helps, so I started taking it. I only took it for 3 days so I'm not too concerned about gabapentin withdrawal, since the consensus seems to be, and logic would dictate, that it only sucks ass when coming off of high doses and a long duration of use. Either way, I feel much, much better than I have for the past few days; I was even able to take a walk in the eastern hardwood forest out back with my trusty .260~ it's buck season, you know!

 

[incaseofaburglar]

Suboxone, after a period of using 16mg/daily for a couple of years continuously was the worst withdrawal I have ever experienced. It lasted a good 90 days if I include PAWs.

Methadone, 130mg/daily for six months, acutely, was super difficult for me. That was a horrific couple of weeks.

However! I have seen people go through alcohol and benzo withdrawal, and I got to say, it seems worse, mainly because of the potential seizures.

 

[Phiddle Head]

Withdrawal for 90 days? You are my hero!

 

[incaseofaburglar]

Not acute withdrawals, but I dropped off from 16mg (I didn't taper, because I didn't have the control), and I definitely, definitely experienced post acute withdrawals for a good three months afterwards. I don't think this is THAT all uncommon with suboxone. A lot of people talk about PAWs/suboxone on opiate forums. Now as the weeks progressed, the PAWs became more and more bearable.

(I had to lock myself in middle America, in my parents basement, I would have never survived it in NYC - where I was living).

 

[Phiddle Head]

Even still, my hat is off to you for doing whatever you had to do to get it done. Mind over matter.

 

[ykm420]

I think you're over-playing the 'Impossible to recover' from BZD's.. I'm addicted to them, and yes it fucking blows, but if I were to taper off, I'm positive after awhile things would go back to 'normal' if you will. They did with my long and heavy Intravenous Opiate / Cocaine use, as with booze, and Amphetamines. Not saying you're full of it, I'm just saying don't have a negative view of it, if you indeed do decide to quit. Best of luck if you do, sincerely..

 

[PsychedelicWizard]

Any physical withdrawal is much easier to overcome than a psychological one. Why? When you are physically sick it is obvious there is something wrong and it is easier to react differently. Being mentally sick in withdrawal is much harder to deal with, because it is hard to say if it is the withdrawal, your emotions, or a mental illness independent of drugs. Although I think an exception to this can be with amphetamines or SSRIs, as the brain fog and brain zaps are more a physical symptom, even if might be classified as a mental one.

If you are a poly-drug user with a primary addiction, especially if you have mental illness, then it becomes even harder to overcome a psychological addiction, as it is really hard to isolate what is causing problems, what is helping, or if the issue is just a temporary emotional one everyone experiences.

 

[SolidEther]

Benzos... So badly that I tapered for a year and only managed to get down to 10mg of diazepam and couldn't function at all so I said fuck it and went back to 20mg by ordering from overseas and have a stockpile of flubromazepam if it ever comes down to that which would last me for years... I have been rapid tapered, gone cold turkey, tried to taper... Fuck it. Benzos for life. And I'm still disabled and unable to function with the low dose of diazepam I'm on now so I don't know what to do. Suicide is always an option for me until I realize how many people I'd destroy and probably take with me, not to mention my belief in reincarnation means I'd just have to do it again.

I can do any drug on a big bender and just stop. Not benzos. Fuck benzos. I hate them so much but they are the only way I can function!

I understand... I am exactly the same way with Adderall. I was also on low dose Klonopin 1.5mg a day as well as 20mg Prozac. I tried to quit all my scripts and felt like a dead carcass all the time. This is also after stopping methadone at 40mgs. I tried to live healthly and quit but couldn't deal with ADD sypmtoms along with Major depressive disorder. I wish I had never touched it for ADD, once I did I could never go back. Tried several times and that made my mental/ physical health worse. I stopped the benzos first thinking that the Adderall would help with benzo and opiate withdrawal, it helped with methadone but stopping benzos (tapered) spun me into full blown psychosis. I never knew how fucking dependent my brain got to that Amphetamine/Benzo combo. It is dysfunctional without it.

I gave myself 2 choices... try to let my brain regain equilibrium over years and risk losing everything to battling my symptoms. Which are themselves only alleviated by Adderall. I tried for months and I could live longer without amphetamine, but live on a hellish painful limbo due to severe ADD, Chronic Major Deppression and PNS dysfunction all due to the damn drugs in the first. I mean I had ADD, but it is MUCH worse than it was if I DO NOT take Adderall. I am in constant signifigant discomfort from peripheral nervous system dysfunction after using the combination of these drugs for so long while randomly using them recreationally.

While not on these medications or at very least the Adderall I feel as though I have periods of no emotion, loss of ego, dysphoria, and de-sensitization. I have an impeding sense of withdrawal from not only society but reality, like an underlying alienation that translates into an underlying anxiety. It translates to an impossible state of being. I never had any depression when I was younger. I was drug free, a Cpl. in the U.S. Marine Corps. Sometimes I feel like all I can do is think about how I would rather be like this in combat where these screwed up senses would be an asset. I too am compelled with suicidal thoughts, but I absolutely love my wife and children so I ignore them. I cannot even enjoy life with them as I should. I should not have to fight to enjoy the company of those I love. It is so hard to explain.

So I decided the second option...

I am going to use drugs for the rest of my life. DAMN IT!
Fuck it the pharmecutical companies got my ass. They snuck up, used my naievty about scripts being all good and safe and I am stuck.

I am getting back on the Klonopin and I am currently back on Adderall. I want to be able to enjoy the smile on my baby daughter's face and feel it when my son says I love you daddy. I want my wife's hug to feel warm and cozy and be a functional husband no matter the cost..

The cost is my indefinate drug dependancy. I cannot be withdrawn in a permanent state of mental and physical agony...

Hold out as long as you can, as long as you can be your self. Hang on

 

[legalizeall]

So I decided the second option...

I am going to use drugs for the rest of my life. DAMN IT!
Fuck it the pharmecutical companies got my ass. They snuck up, used my naievty about scripts being all good and safe and I am stuck.

I am getting back on the Klonopin and I am currently back on Adderall. I want to be able to enjoy the smile on my baby daughter's face and feel it when my son says I love you daddy. I want my wife's hug to feel warm and cozy and be a functional husband no matter the cost..

The cost is my indefinate drug dependancy. I cannot be withdrawn in a permanent state of mental and physical agony...

Hold out as long as you can, as long as you can be your self. Hang on

there is nothing wrong with that man. Doesnt make you any less of a man or weak. Drug dependance is not drug addict. At the end of the day if thats what needs to be in order for you to enjoy life, so be it. Its not anyone to judge or say anything actually. Its your life and your quality of life. No matter the cost cause its your life and nobody elses. Thats what the drugs are made for. Improve quality of life

 

[SolidEther]

legalizeall,

I thank you for your perspective. Yes, it is about quality of life. Your sentiment is felt completely. My parents and in laws have a crushing stigma about therapuetic psychiatric medications. I am made to feel like my need for meds is improper and unecessary. I have a good psychiatrist and therapist that don't just throw pills at me either? My goal is to never go through withdrawal again. It is too detremental for my life.

Thanks again.

 

[Professer]

Im wth everyone on the mistreated by docs train. And Captain kratom, I WD'd from tramadol and pregabalin which is like, much better than gabapentin from what i've read scientifically. Sucks... loperamide is/was a good friend of mine.

I too feel that other guy's pain, I've pretty much got off my benzo but I cant go work or function in society with the anxiety. I was able to mind over matter it in my life till I got in a car accident. Docs from some acclaimed back center have tossed me around, $30 co pay each time, with no real help or understanding of the problem I have or any diagnosis at all. One of the pains I get, the sitting one, I'd experience after sitting in cars smoking blunts in highschool too long - just not as intense. They basically dont listen to me at all, look at xray/mri of my lumbar, see some disc deteriation, and say nothing can be wrong. Half of it is muscular at this point, hence recent BZD run, I cant stand long I cant sit long I have anxiety I cant manage anymore due to all this shit, where does one go? At least Im not smoking stims, minus that 1g of crystal a-php i stole money for sometime in the last month or two. Having no prob keeping away from that.

 

[Toz]

This poll is void untill pregabalin and gabapentin are added to it.