Was this real lsd? first trip experience

[ineKing]

I've done shrooms once (5g for heroic dose about a week or 2 ago and it changed my life- for the better) and I've only done lsd sold as blotter one other time. DMT a handful of times. When I was younger I did a lot of DXM and... heroin, coke, liquor etc etc.

I've been researching lsd and other psychadelics, here and there, for years.

So I got 10 tabs of this "110ug bay area needlepoint" stuff via darknet and wanted to have a profound spiritual experience! So I drove 2 hours to go for a hike. I dropped 2 tabs, the first one at 2:30 and the seconds one at 3:30.

I can say is that it was really weird.
I felt this sort of "lightning" sensation on my skin on the come up, or maybe im only using that word because its what I read. Then soon after my hands (all physical contact) went kind of numb, a LOT like DXM (dextromethorphan)
I felt very disconnected. Colors were brighter and senses of smell were heightened, I became sensitive to hearing reverb (it hurt my ears) objects appeared as if they were breathing, like they had life. Like shrooms, except on shrooms I was able to feel love for what I was looking at....The visuals were nothing extraordinary. Objects were breathing and sometimes I'd make faces out of patterns or see things inside things.
There was some creative thinking.
I became very frightened during a hike, that the ground was unstable and everything would just cave in. I was frozen in terror and couldn't go down one trail. It was probably a lot to do even not on lsd.
I didn't feel "close" or "at one" with nature at all... I was scared of nature and could only appreciate it from a disconnected distance, like looking into my phone's camera with the zoom all the way in looking at a fly on the outside of my car while I sit in the airconditioning.
At several points I noticed where I was rhythmic automatic breathing and moaning similar to a DMT experience, almost like a sexual type moan but no release involved, just a sigh of... mmmmmm
I think this is my body's own intelligence, and my body's way of calming me the fuck down during a traumatic experience.
I became violently fucking hungry and had to eat. I just ate 2 hours before dosing. I'm a person who eats every 2 hours so I luckily carry Tupperware with me everywhere I go. So I found a place to eat.
At which point I washed up upon a beach, and saw a woman I normally wouldn't be attracted to.
I wanted to rape her
Violently
I wanted to knock her boyfriend out and knock her out and drag her by the hair into the woods and rape this bitch.

Which is weird because she's totally not my type.
At one point I was sexualizing an elderly woman.

I didn't want to listen to Donovan and Scott McKenzie and the Beatles. Like I did on shrooms. Or even Stevie Ray Vaughan or Hendrix. All I wanted was modern gangster rap. At one point I was jamming out so hard that I wanted to be in a mosh pit.

Driving felt very pleasurable, going up and down the windy roads felt like a roller coaster and felt like it gave me control.

Any time I encountered any humans I felt EXTREME paranoia.

I never laughed. Once. Or felt love or any of the good connected vibes I felt during shrooms. Most of my trip was spent wondering is this shit even real acid??? Is this the same acid that came out of the 50's and 60's and 70's?

Because I didn't feel much ego-death. It felt very ego-centric. Like I was the center of the universe (like wanted to rape the woman)
I felt very reptilian

Almost 12 hours later... Things are still breathing and

Now I feel very cracked out.

The only emotional insight I got was like... God damn, I appreciate the city so much more after I see how scary this little nature town is. and also, that its sad that I had to drive 2 hours to go to a hike that I otherwise wouldn't have been so present for. Nature is very scary. and that's ok. whatever.

Honestly I'm pretty fucking pissed right now. I wanted to feel some sort of connectedness or see inside my mind even more than what I did (thoughts of rape didn't surprise me)

Does this sound like LSD? or some NBOME?

edit: oh yeah, There was this sense of "I'm going to have to take a shit" The entire trip. Even after I shit. And my stomach is still a little funky.

 

[donvliet]

Going into a trip with expectations about how it's going to turn out, often leads to disappointment and an uncomfortable experience. The trick is to be as open as possible about what the trip can bring. One of the most fascinating things about true psychedelics is the directionlessness of the experience. In contrast to drugs like MDMA, psychedelics don't provide the same experience every time. Instead, the trip is determined mainly by set and setting. What is your environment and what do you bring with you into the experience. What is on you conscious and subconscious mind. This can lead to difficult confrontations with yourself, but also presents tremendous potential for learning and personal growth. And working through the themes that are brought up from the subconscious can ultimately lead to strong feelings of joy, bliss and love. It is not necessarily an easy proces, but there is always potential for a worthwhile experience.

The funny thing is, it doesn't have to lead to this type of deep introspective trip. Sometimes the time seems to be right for a lighthearted fun experience. Some trips are more visual than others, some are more spiritual or dark. All of them can provide insight into yourself.

Also, mushrooms are different in character to LSD. Both are powerful psychedelics, but some people prefer the one over the other.

 

[Kaleida]

Hey ineKing, unfortunately we don't allow "What did I take?" threads here, so I'm going to have to close this. None of us could possibly determine what drug you took with any certainty, and doing so would only open up the possibility for dangerous situations if we were incorrect.

However, I will just say that donvliet is right.... It sounds like you went in wanting the stereotypical hippy-dippy experience.... It doesn't work that way. Psychedelics bring out what's inside you a lot more than they just change you out of the blue; someone who constantly thinks about sex and doesn't feel very connected to nature is likely to think about sex even more and still not feel connected to nature at all while tripping. If you want to change those things about yourself, you need to change them yourself, and then when you take psychedelics you'll be able to have the kind of experience you're looking for.... That's how psychedelics generally work in these situations too, they make you aware of things you want to change.

Anyway, everything you described is so general as a psychedelic effect that there's really no reason it couldn't have just been LSD from the sounds of it. Another indicator might be the presence of a taste on the blotter; if it was very bitter then it likely wasn't LSD, but if it was basically tasteless then it very possibly was the real deal. Again, however, we cannot say much beyond that, so this is where it'll have to end.