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Things you recommend sticking your wang into -versus- things you might think twice about in the future (your poor little fella)

If I was a guy I’d stick it in this....

It does sound like fun not going to lie.. and the best part is there’s an app for it! Can you imagine? Finally an app for jacking off! Thank you @MsDiz for bringing this beautiful creation to our attention!
 
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jesus christ is it going to get me off or cut it off???

looks kinda small in the pics too

I've bought some cheap Chinese ones and my dick doesn't even fit inside

A lot of these things with crazy shit on the inside are too much for me, I prefer the simpler ones

I don't want to feel like I'm sticking it in a robot razorblade sandpaper factory

You beat me to it I was going to ask about this...

Looks like sticking your dick into some sort of nuclear reactor.

In fact you could probably re-label that image to make it seem like it is some of thermonuclear weapon, just replace "dynamic flick orb" to "fissible material".
 
You beat me to it I was going to ask about this...

Looks like sticking your dick into some sort of nuclear reactor.

In fact you could probably re-label that image to make it seem like it is some of thermonuclear weapon, just replace "dynamic flick orb" to "fissible material".
The nuclear pocket pussy.. get yours now! My luck I’d be ducking it and it’d go off.. there goes the neighborhood cuz freudzilla was rubbing one out again..
 
I'm too much of a skinflint to have tried any of the proprietary masturbatory aids, but under the influence of amphetamines I've experimented with many home made contraptions.

I've finally concluded that in the absence of a willing mouth or vag, nothing beats your fist...
 
I'm too much of a skinflint to have tried any of the proprietary masturbatory aids, but under the influence of amphetamines I've experimented with many home made contraptions.

I've finally concluded that in the absence of a willing mouth or vag, nothing beats your fist...
Idk I tend to agree. However I knew tweaker once who was a good friend of mine who swore that if you cut a chickens head off and stuck you penis in the neck hole it was better than sex.. I’ve never tried it but hearing him talk about it made it sound quite awesome.. I asked him what he did with the chicken afterwards and he said fried it.. I never ate chicken at his house after that.. he apparently got the idea from a movie I believe it was “the devils rejects” by rob zombie if I’m not mistaken.. so if you have chickens I guess it can’t hurt to try..
 
Could be up to ten minutes if you're expecting explosions from flesh other than cavities
 
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Bastard. You probably jerk off into phony bologna in jail (screaming that its made from babies) and make the cops feel self conscious watching your cam while in solitary
 
F.U.B.A.R. How is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in bed? Would you recommend it?


Bastard. You probably jerk off into phony bologna in jail (screaming that its made from babies) and make the cops feel self conscious watching your cam while in solitary

And no I just jerk off in my hand and throw it at the glass window in my observation cell..I prefer to decorate my area with a little personal touch.. besides it makes a great sauce for on top of that phony bologna 😂😂🤤🤤
 
I think my joke that was deleted was entirely misunderstood based upon the reason for deletion
 
I guess the thread is about sticking your penis in things. Makes sense I guess for the reason. I tend to veer OT.
 
I think my joke that was deleted was entirely misunderstood based upon the reason for deletion

We love a good joke here in SLR but there is limit when it comes to sex with babies. I’ve cleaned up a couple of posts by others in on the joke. Sorry it had to be this way but it was just too much and we received complaints about it. No harm no foul.
 
We love a good joke here in SLR but there is limit when it comes to sex with babies. I’ve cleaned up a couple of posts by others in on the joke. Sorry it had to be this way but it was just too much and we received complaints about it. No harm no foul.
Can you PM me what the joke was? I don't think I was talking about fucking babies, only eating them
 
My bad didn’t mean to offend anybody.. it was 100% in jest. I’ll be careful what I post in the future. Also probably avoid jokes all together when I’m a little buzzed 😉
 
My bad didn’t mean to offend anybody.. it was 100% in jest. I’ll be careful what I post in the future. Also probably avoid jokes all together when I’m a little buzzed 😉

Yep. No dramas. We know people were being humorous and there was no ill intent. Good jokes are always welcome and posting when buzzed is always fine.
 
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