Taking testosterone for reasons other than getting bigger or stronger

I am really thinking about doing this. I think i will start as a reward to myself when I taper off of phenibut completely. Again my goal is not to improve my physique since my unusually high natural testosterone production has allowed me to get as large as I'll ever want to be (albeit at the expense of my ligaments and connective tissue). My goal with taking testosterone is for cognitive, energy, and well-being improvements.

It might be prudent to obtain blood testosterone results prior to considering exogenous testosterone.
If your natural levels are as high as you state, it might NOT be a good idea to consider shutting yourself down, with the reality of those levels not returning.
 
It might be prudent to obtain blood testosterone results prior to considering exogenous testosterone.
If your natural levels are as high as you state, it might NOT be a good idea to consider shutting yourself down, with the reality of those levels not returning.

In the past year and a half tested a few times high 800's/low 900's (serum, ng/dl) so pretty high for a guy in his mid thirties. I used to regularly test above the reference range when i was younger. Never much over reference but whatever the serum levels were tested at were accompanied by an "H" to denote out of reference (thus my use of the term, unusually high). Some years back I went to a new internist and the guy asked me if i was using steroids due to the test result. Not certain if I could still test out of reference, but I'm sure I can still break 1000ng/dl quite easily if i trained and ate right (the most recent blood tests were taken during COVID where I was drinking more and lifting way less and far lighter).

But yes that is my main concern. Ruin a good thing I have going, permanently shutting myself down, losing hair and becoming forever dependent on testosterone injections.

But my counter argument is, perhaps having serum testosterone of say for the sake of example 2,200ng/dl (which I'll never attain naturally), will result in a meaningful increase in my overall quality of life. For instance, my heavy duty abuse of benzos in years past seems to have permanently increased my anxiety, so one hope would be that supraphysiological test levels would be perhaps a little helpful given its anxiolytic properties and tendency to increase the efficiency of the GABAergic system. My real hope would be that exogenous testosterone would sort of act like a lubricant, reduce my tendency to lock-up a bit sometimes from anxiety or reduce my avoidant/evasive type behaviors I sometimes engage in. Sort of like a WD40 for my rusty GABAergic system. (Whether or not it will perform that function is different matter.)

Might be helpful in other regards as well. Faster recovery after exercise would be nice as well. However I have no plans to go back to the kind of weight I was lifting that got me to the size in the photo I posted, it isn't worth the injuries (although I would love to lift like that again). Of course it will be tempting to try to get back into lifting heavy again but I really have no interest in getting any bigger than myself in that photo. Would like to get leaner than that though.

In short, we only live once (as far as i know): perhaps supraphysiological testosterone would improve life for me.

The stakes are very high on this one though. It would be a lifetime commitment essentially.
 
Sounds like you've already made your mind up..!!!
If you are not already getting the associated benefits of your supraphysiological testosterone levels, I'd be looking at improving diet, NOT injecting a hormone you don't need..
My 2c..
 
So I am in my mid 30's and have had this long-standing desire to inject maybe 200mg(?) or so of some testosterone ester in my muscle once a week.

The question is, what do I hope to gain? I have naturally high testosterone and now even in my mid 30s i test in the high 800's low 900's. When i was younger I would regular test above the reference range and get an "H" next to the number (ie, "high" or abnormal). Granted I'm less aware my free testosterone looks like. And i'm not bald so it looks like my 5-alpha-reductase doesn't convert to it to the more anabolic DHT.

Still I put on muscle quickly, have very unusual strength for my weight and people have accused me of being on steroids because of my delts. * note the gyno isnt from steroids but from high dose methadone from years before that won't go away



Even that was on heavy amounts of opioids, and i have no interest in getting bigger than that. Wouldnt mind maybe being that size and leaner, but not trying to get bigger. It is too much work and the heavy weights really fucks with my joints. I partially tore the tendon connecting my elbow to my tricep when i was benching and am afraid of making it worse by benching much more than two plates these days anyhow (i used to be able to do two plates for 16 reps on the flat bench and well over 20 on the decline, i used to be a bench press addict).

Point is im not interested in getting bigger -- although without question I would lift more if i were injecting testosterone, i would take advantage of it, just smarter not heavier, I'm done with lifting heavy, in fact i see no benefit of getting anywhere beyond my 5 RM. Would be nice to get a good lean rip going though, that seems bad ass. But really my main interest isnt that (i could get a lean ripped physique if i paid attention to my diet), my main interest in adding testosterone is more for cognitive and motivation improvements.

Anyone have information on the gains and benefits (and downsides) in that regard? Ie what one gains in terms of cognition, drive, motivation, mood etc and what one gives up (like anxiety, physical side-effects etc). Im talking strictly about testosterone, intramuscular at maybe 125 to 250mg a week. My concern is that it will just permanently shut me down/induce exogenous testosterone dependency when i technically have a good thing going with my high testosterone (and the benefit of strength yet lack of hair loss). On the flip side, i wonder what i missing from not having true supraphysiological testosterone levels?
Your younger and well pumping out allot more test naturally so adding more just adds more...remember it is NOT anabolic very much ---trust me on that ! Did them all and Primo Bolin and D -Ball will add allot of mass in muscles. Actually Methyl Testosterone is not that bad and has a rating of about 5. 10 to 12 being most anabolic. Equipoise will definitely boost but get terrible joint pains for few weeks. But loved it because you can load up allot of it! So many good ones out there but all of them absolutely will boost up testosterone big time without even taking plain old Test injections or pills. But did them all and allot from 1990s to 2018. Best to cycle few months one few months off, to be safe as it puts allot of load on kidneys and liver. Plus need to cut too. Went from 190 lbs. to 265 lbs. in one year.... so who ever in the world says they don't work is full of sh## and jealous. Good ones work great!
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Figured I'd bump this thread as I am in a similar place asking myself a similar question. 37 y/o male, total test not as high as op, but around 490-590, so still well within normal range. Free T of about 13, all other hormones / blood markers also in normal range, but struggling with lack of motivation/vitality/zest/depression.I've had these issues for essentially half my life and been through the ringer with psychotherapy / psychopharmacology, some of which sometimes helps to some extent, but rarely completely, and never permanently, hence my considering TRT. Essentially, the question is, could more testosterone be the solution, even though a lack of testosterone does not appear to be the problem? Would be curious to hear from others who have tried TRT coming from a similar position - also curious to know if op or @negrogesic went ahead with it..?
 
And i'm not bald so it looks like my 5-alpha-reductase doesn't convert to it to the more anabolic DHT.
Haha sorry, but 5-alpha-reductase deficiency is an intersex condition, and you'd know it if you had it, because you'd have been born with completely or mostly female - appearing genitals. Your testosterone to dihydrotestosterone conversion is fine ; but not every man's follicles are equally sensitive to it. That has genetic factors, for instance members of certain ethnicities are far less likely on average to bald than others.
Anyone have information on the gains and benefits (and downsides) in that regard?
If you already have what you call abnormally high T levels, ffs don't pump more into yourself! Your body already has as much as it can handle and you will have a heightened risk of heart attack, stroke and impotence. Oh and the higher the testosterone levels in a man, the more of it converts to oestrogen via aromatase.
 
Oh and the higher the testosterone levels in a man, the more of it converts to oestrogen via aromatase.
True, but that is fine, we need a good ratio of Testosterone to Estradiol.
If the E2 is too high it can be brought down to a more reasonable level.
you will have a heightened risk of heart attack, stroke and impotence.
We are not discussing the use of steroids and Test specifically in a bodybuilding context were these would be a concern.
If one takes just enough to be in the high physiological range and exercises regularly there is no increased risk.
 
Figured I'd bump this thread as I am in a similar place asking myself a similar question. 37 y/o male, total test not as high as op, but around 490-590, so still well within normal range. Free T of about 13, all other hormones / blood markers also in normal range, but struggling with lack of motivation/vitality/zest/depression.I've had these issues for essentially half my life and been through the ringer with psychotherapy / psychopharmacology, some of which sometimes helps to some extent, but rarely completely, and never permanently, hence my considering TRT. Essentially, the question is, could more testosterone be the solution, even though a lack of testosterone does not appear to be the problem? Would be curious to hear from others who have tried TRT coming from a similar position - also curious to know if op or @negrogesic went ahead with it..?
It could be of benefit to you. The shortcoming of many clinicians when it comes to hormone replacement is treating numbers, not symptoms. You could be fine on paper but still have deficiency symptoms that require more elevated testosterone to remedy. I know I feel best when total T is around 800-1000. 500-800 I feel decent. Below 500 for longer periods and I feel more lethargic.
 
So far test has been great for my depression - I take 70-140mg a week injecting every day or every other day depending how I feel. I take finasteride to stop the dht attacking my hair.
 
Figured I'd bump this thread as I am in a similar place asking myself a similar question. 37 y/o male, total test not as high as op, but around 490-590, so still well within normal range. Free T of about 13, all other hormones / blood markers also in normal range, but struggling with lack of motivation/vitality/zest/depression.I've had these issues for essentially half my life and been through the ringer with psychotherapy / psychopharmacology, some of which sometimes helps to some extent, but rarely completely, and never permanently, hence my considering TRT. Essentially, the question is, could more testosterone be the solution, even though a lack of testosterone does not appear to be the problem? Would be curious to hear from others who have tried TRT coming from a similar position - also curious to know if op or @negrogesic went ahead with it..?

No I have not started taking testosterone yet, but I think about it everyday. I am still on the fence for the following reasons:

1. I'm afraid of the side-effects. One fear is that I'll start taking it and experience hair loss and gyno. It is hard to see but in that picture I posted I already have a slight touch of gyno from being on methadone years ago. Also afraid of longer term side-effects, like prostate cancer, particularly given that my grandfather died from it. His build was much like mine and was the one I think I got my high testosterone gene from. It may also he the gene that killed him. I know TRT doesn't seem to aggravate prostate cancer in men with lower levels of testosterone, but what happens when you given a guy with a natural 1000ng/dl additional testosterone? All of these fears however don't fully deter me, and I think I should see minimal side-effects if I keep blood levels below say 1,500ng/dl.

2. How will I secure a stable supply of injectable testosterone? Since most reputable physicians won't prescribe TRT for a guy in his 30's with robust levels of testosterone, I'll have to source it myself. My initial plan is to drive down to Mexico (which is around 4 hours one way) and buy some injectable testosterone. It is sold openly as I have bought it once before (years ago I bought one 250mg readiject syringe of sustanon and injected it into my glute just to see what would happen). I'd do some research before I went but I'm thinking about buying those same 250mg Sustanon readiject syringes, which are preloaded syringes with a blend of testosterone esters. While I would prefer having a single ester of testosterone so that I could fine tune my testosterone blood levels, I sort of don't trust buying ampules in mexico since they are so easy to fuck with. The Sustanon readiject are made by Organon and seem very difficult to fake (especially for the $20 that they sell for). Problem is, Mexico is 4 hours away, so the Mexican Sustanon approach seems like a pain in the ass and pretty expensive in the long run. I would have to figure out something else, and it would have to be pharma grade since I am not willing to inject someone's homebrew testosterone into my muscle. I suppose worse case is that I could figure out how to import some raw testosterone powder and make my own homebrew, but that sounds like a serious pain in the ass (literally and figuratively). Either way, my first approach would be Mexico.

One question for those who said they have noticed psychological or non-strength/growth related effects from testosterone. How long does it take to notice a benefit?

One thought I had was to use it for say a month and evaluate if I felt much better, at which point I'd decided if it was worth continuing. If i didn't feel it was helpful enough at that point I would begin some sort of PCT and stop the test. But I have a feeling that wouldn't happen and that I'd want to continue.

It is a major decision since it will likely require a life-long commitment if I am to start at this age. But my thought is that life is short, so why not take something that could improve the quality of my life in perhaps a very meaningful way?
 
So I am in my mid 30's and have had this long-standing desire to inject maybe 200mg(?) or so of some testosterone ester in my muscle once a week.

The question is, what do I hope to gain? I have naturally high testosterone and now even in my mid 30s i test in the high 800's low 900's. When i was younger I would regular test above the reference range and get an "H" next to the number (ie, "high" or abnormal). Granted I'm less aware my free testosterone looks like. And i'm not bald so it looks like my 5-alpha-reductase doesn't convert to it to the more anabolic DHT.

Still I put on muscle quickly, have very unusual strength for my weight and people have accused me of being on steroids because of my delts. * note the gyno isnt from steroids but from high dose methadone from years before that won't go away



Even that was on heavy amounts of opioids, and i have no interest in getting bigger than that. Wouldnt mind maybe being that size and leaner, but not trying to get bigger. It is too much work and the heavy weights really fucks with my joints. I partially tore the tendon connecting my elbow to my tricep when i was benching and am afraid of making it worse by benching much more than two plates these days anyhow (i used to be able to do two plates for 16 reps on the flat bench and well over 20 on the decline, i used to be a bench press addict).

Point is im not interested in getting bigger -- although without question I would lift more if i were injecting testosterone, i would take advantage of it, just smarter not heavier, I'm done with lifting heavy, in fact i see no benefit of getting anywhere beyond my 5 RM. Would be nice to get a good lean rip going though, that seems bad ass. But really my main interest isnt that (i could get a lean ripped physique if i paid attention to my diet), my main interest in adding testosterone is more for cognitive and motivation improvements.

Anyone have information on the gains and benefits (and downsides) in that regard? Ie what one gains in terms of cognition, drive, motivation, mood etc and what one gives up (like anxiety, physical side-effects etc). Im talking strictly about testosterone, intramuscular at maybe 125 to 250mg a week. My concern is that it will just permanently shut me down/induce exogenous testosterone dependency when i technically have a good thing going with my high testosterone (and the benefit of strength yet lack of hair loss). On the flip side, i wonder what i missing from not having true supraphysiological testosterone levels?
you have done well to get to that stage.

now you need to swim like km's a day rip that shit up so its not bubble and its true iron.

then it will last.

there are two paths in martial arts.

one is big

the other is strong and they are not the same thing.

go to big and the strong becomes harder as the muscle becomes useless.

your at the right size for your body now to make it solid for as long as possible

rip it down dude rip it down.
 
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1. I'm afraid of the side-effects.
As for the effects on your prostate, I think PSA (prostate-specific antigen) is something you are supposed to meassure before you start and as you go along. Generally, by my understanding, the risk of serious / potentially lethal side effects with TRT (assuming reasonable dosages) is way overblown. There is however a real risk of minor (or not so minor, depending on how you feel about it) cosmetic issues (acne, hair loss), having a hard time getting "dialed in", and the whole thing potentially not having the effect one was hoping for. Also, of course, infertifility, and in some cases ED / loss of libido, though generally the opposite tends to be the case.
2. How will I secure a stable supply of injectable testosterone?
My impression was that the US is probably one of the easiest countries in the world to get a TRT prescription in. Don't you guys have like a gazillion TRT clinics? Ideally, you would want to find one that is shady enough to prescribe you TRT despite your levels being ok, but also reputable enough to actually be of help in guiding you along the whole process, explaining your blood markers, helping you get dialed in, etc. One company with a lot of hype behind it is Marek health, but that's because a major influencer in this space (Derek from MPMD) is pushing for it. Dunno if they are actually good, but if not them, then some other clinic - you certainly have a lot of options in the US.
 
As for the effects on your prostate, I think PSA (prostate-specific antigen) is something you are supposed to meassure before you start and as you go along. Generally, by my understanding, the risk of serious / potentially lethal side effects with TRT (assuming reasonable dosages) is way overblown. There is however a real risk of minor (or not so minor, depending on how you feel about it) cosmetic issues (acne, hair loss), having a hard time getting "dialed in", and the whole thing potentially not having the effect one was hoping for. Also, of course, infertifility, and in some cases ED / loss of libido, though generally the opposite tends to be the case.

My impression was that the US is probably one of the easiest countries in the world to get a TRT prescription in. Don't you guys have like a gazillion TRT clinics? Ideally, you would want to find one that is shady enough to prescribe you TRT despite your levels being ok, but also reputable enough to actually be of help in guiding you along the whole process, explaining your blood markers, helping you get dialed in, etc. One company with a lot of hype behind it is Marek health, but that's because a major influencer in this space (Derek from MPMD) is pushing for it. Dunno if they are actually good, but if not them, then some other clinic - you certainly have a lot of options in the US.
Yeah trt clinics are a dime a dozen here now. I got like 3 reputable ones within a 30 minute drive.
 
Not too long ago I did try and find a TRT clinic that seemed shady, the guy was young and jacked, and was a DO (the combo made me think he'd be a bit shadier than say a 56 year old MD endocrinologist). He said no however. Perhaps I spoke in an excessively articulate way as to set off alarm bells that I was an uncover cop or some sort of investigator for the medical review board.
 
This is an interesting article on the best protocol for TRT - daily subq injection of cyponiate.


Personally I found I prefer every other day - I feel really good on the second day when I don't inject.

How long to feel the effects? Well, I certainly started feeling a mood lift within a couple of weeks - even tho they say it takes months. Funnily enough when you have been on it a while if you take a slightly bigger dose one day you can feel the difference within hours.

Is that your pug in your avatar btw negrogesic?
 
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Well!!!

I started today. Testosterone gel, at a fairly highly starting dose, 100mg/day of transdermal testosterone.

An hour ago I took a very hot shower, scrubbed my arms till they were bright red, and applied about 80mg of testosterone gel to my shoulders and upper arms, and around 20mg on my scrotum. People on reddit said applying the gel to the scrotum was unbearably painful due to the alcohol content. It definitely did burn like hell but was hardly unbearable.

Earlier this morning I had bloodwork done as a sort of pre measurement, consisting of a fairly comprehensive endo panel to measure total/free testosterone, estradiol, thyroid panel, comprehensive lipid panel, CBC, general metabolic/chemistry panels, and I also threw in PSA and IGF-1 labs in there (I order and interpret all my own bloodwork).

This is gel is just a test though as I'm sure I'll need to stop fucking around and get the injectables. Will probably go with an online TRT provider, it's good to be under the care of someone, even if it is some D.O. in Florida. I don't have experience with hormones, and while its not rocket science, those TRT docs have been around the block and I'm sure are helpful.

Prior to my blood test this morning I had my girlfriend give me a blowjob in hopes it would lower my testosterone levels, and I have been avoiding the gym for a week. My reasoning is that I want my labs to show as little testosterone as possible in the event I decide to show my labs to a TRT doc in the near future. My fear is that in the event my bloodwork shows high levels of testosterone, say 900ng/dl, even the shadiest D.O. might not be willing to write me a prescription for more.

In any event, I started today! Supposedly the gel results in higher DHT conversion than the injects, which is good because that has far higher neuroactive properties (ie, mood and cognition modulating effects). Problem is, with my testosterone levels already naturally high, this gel probably isn't strong enough for me. We'll see...
 
Well!!!

I started today. Testosterone gel, at a fairly highly starting dose, 100mg/day of transdermal testosterone.

An hour ago I took a very hot shower, scrubbed my arms till they were bright red, and applied about 80mg of testosterone gel to my shoulders and upper arms, and around 20mg on my scrotum. People on reddit said applying the gel to the scrotum was unbearably painful due to the alcohol content. It definitely did burn like hell but was hardly unbearable.

Earlier this morning I had bloodwork done as a sort of pre measurement, consisting of a fairly comprehensive endo panel to measure total/free testosterone, estradiol, thyroid panel, comprehensive lipid panel, CBC, general metabolic/chemistry panels, and I also threw in PSA and IGF-1 labs in there (I order and interpret all my own bloodwork).

This is gel is just a test though as I'm sure I'll need to stop fucking around and get the injectables. Will probably go with an online TRT provider, it's good to be under the care of someone, even if it is some D.O. in Florida. I don't have experience with hormones, and while its not rocket science, those TRT docs have been around the block and I'm sure are helpful.

Prior to my blood test this morning I had my girlfriend give me a blowjob in hopes it would lower my testosterone levels, and I have been avoiding the gym for a week. My reasoning is that I want my labs to show as little testosterone as possible in the event I decide to show my labs to a TRT doc in the near future. My fear is that in the event my bloodwork shows high levels of testosterone, say 900ng/dl, even the shadiest D.O. might not be willing to write me a prescription for more.

In any event, I started today! Supposedly the gel results in higher DHT conversion than the injects, which is good because that has far higher neuroactive properties (ie, mood and cognition modulating effects). Problem is, with my testosterone levels already naturally high, this gel probably isn't strong enough for me. We'll see...

From memory I believe the cream is about 7% bioavailable.. To address issues with testosterone metabolism via CYP3A4, maybe eat half a grapefruit with your breakfast at least 20 mins before application of cream.. This may sustain bioavailable plasma testosterone for longer...
 
Bro you look great. Enjoy being healthy and buff without having to abuse your body to get it.
 
I get the odd pump of gel

I get all pumped up immediately

Power of placebo
 
Bro you look great. Enjoy being healthy and buff without having to abuse your body to get it.

Not doing it to try to get bigger. If anything I prefer to be smaller than that picture of me natural on the first page. I'm not about the bodybuilder physique since I'm barely over 5'9" and I feel like too much muscle makes me look short.

But even more importantly, as much as I enjoy lifting heavy weights, I just don't want to lift that heavy anymore since my joints and tendons have a hard time keeping up with it. I used to be a bench press addict, just loved the way it felt, the sensation, the soreness, and it was cool that the only other dudes at our university gym who you'd ever see benching 3 plates aside from me were some of the big black dudes on the football team (that had 100 pounds on me).

On a side note, if anyone is trying to up their flat bench I highly recommend integrating the decline bench press. The decline press is how I got used to the feel of 3 plates, since the decline press allows you to press significantly heavier weight than you can do on the flat (i didn't even usually use a spot for 3 plates on the decline). Getting used to the feel of three plates allowed me to eventually start pressing 3 plates on the flat bench (always with a spot though). But the decline bench got me comfortable with simply the holding the bar with three plates (or in other words 6 45lb plates, aka 315lbs).

But my joints and in particular tendons couldn't keep up with it and I eventually partially detached my tricep after a long benching session. Never quite recovered, and these days I'm afraid to bench much more than 2 plates (aka 225lbs) out of fear that something else might happen. My arm hurts everyday from that shit and I probably need surgery. I miss lifting heavy though.

So long story short, not trying to get bigger than that photo because a) it makes me look short and b) too many injuries to lift that heavy.

I'm taking testosterone in hopes I might get a useful anxiolytic/antidepressant effect out of it.

My guess is that it might work initially but then said property will wane, particularly as the imbalance from the exogenous hormones throughs the delicate balance out of wack, estrogen starts increasing, etc. Hormones are perpetually performing this delicate balancing act, one that I'm about to interrupt. But we only live once, perhaps it will increase the quality of my life, or perhaps it will just make me bald within a year, with mood swings and gyno etc.

But I absolutely wrecked my GABAergic system through past benzo habits of truly tremendous scale, and despite quitting years ago I am sort of shellshocked in a sense, anxiety through the roof. Was just hoping for some relief and perhaps restoration.

That said, its almost 2:00am and I am wide awake, and that testosterone gel seems to have exacerbated my insomnia, will update as a go along.
 
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