My short term goals are to try to stay balanced, to deal with the ups and downs that I constantly go through.
My long term goals are to try and become the person I truly am inside (my higher self) and be able to live as this person all the time, not one moment gloomy, angry and overly frustrated/stressed and the next over excited and just a little too happy for my own good, I want to find balance, become a gentle warm, kind person, capable of deep understanding and compassion for my fellow humans.
At the moment that last part seems impossible, I'm way too cynical, when I look around at most people I'm so extremely disappointed in what direction most are going, a lot of people are just so extremely stupid and ignorant
by choice.They just act without thinking, just plain stupidity all over.Some people do give me a lot of hope though, it's all so double...
But maybe as I get older I can deal with these frustrations a lot better and judge people as they really are.I'm often scared of myself though, the things that go through my mind sometimes are quite disturbing, the amount of unique torture methods I allow myself to fabricate, as a way of mental entertainment are probably not too healthy, I've mentally wasted way too many people, which is going straight against the person I'd like to become, this duality must end, I just hope I'll manage to do that some day.
(Not that I'd ever want to actually do the things I think about, not at all, it's just a way to vent my frustrations, I'd rather kill myself first before actually hurting someone else)
Getting older seems to work out for me, I tend to cope better with things the older I get.