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so catholic satanism the occult and chaos magick

Lol willow start a cult, if the ghb and all is at a church I'm so in.
 
Willow, what was your deleriant trip like? I've never used them and have no plans on trying, but in reading some trip reports of deleriant use, they seem oddly similar to sleep paralysis.
 
Hmm, hard to describe. I had typical insectile hallucinations, often quite tactile also. Lots of misinterpretion of shadow-density. I don't know if you are familiar with Arthur Rackham, a book illustrator who made some totally creepy weird landscapes. Well, I felt like I was in his world and its awful. Difficulty in telling if I was awake/asleep. Difficulty in telling if I was talking/not-talking, moving/not-moving, etc. Massive fast heartrate, overheating, inability to urinate... A few phantom cigarettes were smoked. To be honest, the experience was traumatic to me. It intefered with my short term memory badly, so I cannot recall much in sequence. I still have the occaisional experience in sober life that reminds me of my 'difficult time'.

Now, the only funny and interesting thing/s that occured may not seem that way... But, I recall sitting and talking to my girlfriend, asking her to calm me down. She seemed to be unable to understand what I was asking so I resorted to using sign language. I was waving my hands around in a kind of circle to indicate the spaciousness of my discontent and I noticed that my cigarette was streaming sparks that seemed to be suspended in a figure 8 around my body. Fear of fire took hold until I realised my girlfriend wasn't even home, I was lying down on my bed, there was no figure-8 of flame because I wasn't smoking. This sort of blew my mind, what I had been doing had felt so vivid so I got up from my bed only to realise that I was smoking, my girlfriend was with me and I had been pouring water all around me in some attempt to cool myself down. This happened over and over, where I would decide that what I thought I was doing I actually wasn't only to discover that I really was. It felt like this loop went for hours. So much anxiety, I have never wanted an experience to be over as much.

I kept trying to take other drugs during it and I convinced myself (countless times) that I what I was actually on was N2O. My poor girlfriend basically hid my stash from me and only helped me smoke pot.

Of course, once I sobered up I decided to quit all drugs forever which is about 5 days apparently. I actually scopolamine one more time, at roughly the same dose and it had no effect. I was in benzo withdrawl too at that point. Thank fuck it didn't work. :\
 
Kittycat5 said:
Willow, what was your deleriant trip like? I've never used them and have no plans on trying, but in reading some trip reports of deleriant use, they seem oddly similar to sleep paralysis.
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I have done Datura and henbane a few times, but only in low doses, because I was afraid of the unpredictable potency and the very narrow "therapeutic" index of anticholinergics. Willow, did you do scopolamine in its pure form? I'm actually still curious towards that side of the psychoactive substance spectrum, so I still have it in my head to grow a few plants and perhaps extract the alkaloids. I've been thinking about it for years, but haven't got around to doing it yet.

The only hallucinations I experienced on deliriants was bugs crawling on my walls, which were actually little specks that I inspected later that looked like bugs to me. All in all, I didn't lose my sanity because of the low dosages, so I can't say, but it didn't feel similar to sleep paralysis. The world seemed surreal during the trip, as opposed to frightening, as is with sleep paralysis in my experience.

E @ willow: interesting. I'm glad the second time it didn't work, because going on a deliriant trip while in benzo WD is perhaps the Darwin award of the century. Who in their right mind would want to do that?
 
^Scopolamine was derived from travel-sickness tablets. I don't know if there is a difference between hyoscine and scopolamine...? Wikipedia seems to consider them synonymous.

Don't datura/brugmansia plants have a rather extraordinary aura? Just their shapes are alarming... Beautiful, but alarming, almost femme fatale. I grew datura metel for a time; it simply looks dangerous and exciting, like the fast car of the plant kingdom.
 
The thing with hyoscine, hyoscyamine and atropine on Wiki has annoyed me for ages. Hyoscine, also known as scopolamine, is a different substance than atropine/hyoscyamine. It's an epoxide of the latter. Atropine is however the same molecule as hyoscyamine, except hyoscyamine is only one of the optical isomers of atropine. So all hyoscyamine is atropine, but not all atropine is hyoscyamine. Scopolamine is, in turn, the epoxide of hyoscyamine (only the S isomer). I think it's somewhat confusing when there's different articles on the same substance, except one being an article on the racemate, and the other about the S isomer. Somebody who doesn't understand chemistry might think they're different substances, or at least it seems so to me.

Furthermore, at least one article (on D. stramonium) says the following: "All parts of Datura plants contain dangerous levels of the tropane alkaloids atropine, hyoscyamine, and scopolamine,..". Which when you think about it makes no sense, since all hyoscyamine is atropine, so it makes no sense to separate the two and list them as different alkaloids. I don't know, but it annoys me, however I haven't bothered to edit it to see how long it'll last. And it's still there through all this time. SMH. /pedantic rant

On your second point, however. I absolutely agree. I don't know if it's just my imagination, because I know what the plant is all about, but it does have that weird aura around it. I live close to a botanical garden, in which grows many species of Datura and other related Solanacae, and I often visit it to admire the plants. I don't know why. I'm not the spiritual type, but something about the plant attracts me. In a surreal way.
 
very interesting ya'll sank you very much for your contribution - Abe Lincoln 1994 Washington

anyway
im smoking 5-meo-dalt and diphinidine rapidly atm and it's rather divine. I think i have truly achieved my goals and followed the path given to my by my grey ancestry. I meet people every day who are so unique and beautiful and it's amazing. Life used to suck so bad for me. I'd try to kill myself every day and just wouldn't die. now i'm reaching for the skies with my wings patrolling with lucifer and the annunaki n shit. lol jk


but yeah there's something real special about these chemicals and magick and the universe, i'm still learning.
 
ive had OBEs my whole life and lucid dreams. I am a grandmaster at controlling the experience now. Greys upgraded me 6 months ago with a chip behind my eye and i've been much better since lol happenedin sleep paralysis while sober! but no deliriants arent truth in this universe, nmda antagonists are. from k to mxe,dxm, mxp, diphinidine, ephinidine, pcp, 3-meo-pcp, 0-pce there's something real special about them! it's undeniable. If you want to know more, i'll gladly explain in detail but i follow the lead of Peter Carroll who is a psychonaut chaos magickan.
 
Not to sound harsh or anything, but you may want to take a break from those if you really believe what you're saying. Dissociatives are no joke.
 
I hate to agree^. What you are saying, RobotRipping, seems like a candidate for dissacociative induced, primary self delusion. I am experimenting with chaos magick and sigils right now actually, though purely from curiosity. I am highly skeptical.
 
hehe well you guys i took a break, then i got a fast ass car and floored it and still same results, this is truth.
 
truth is absolute; and is nothing; and yeah yeah ime and imo your mileage may vary.
 
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