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Say something you can't say to their face

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In most of the time some of us have to be okay and less anxious (at work or at home) when we decide to be happy instead of being right.
 
I see. As long as I'm not..._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _.

:)

Yes. Everyday. It's long term.
 
Unfortunately the break is over. Back to work seems right now like a nightmare. I was just starting. Oh well..
 
Hi A,

I can't believe I am writing this letter of a goodbye to you. I never thought after everything we went through what I lost it would come down to this.

You blame me for everything and I had a huge part of what went wrong in our relationship. You did not for a minute take a step back and realize the shit I went through.

Lets start with M. Yes A you are right. I wanted to have a threesome with you and your friend Sam. I don’t fancy Sam and not for one minute was attracted to her. I was attracted to the idea of you and Sam sleeping together which you told me you did. As a guy this turned me on and I wanted a threesome with her. Not because its Sam its because you fancied her and you went into detail with the things you did with her. This turned me on, Sam could have been any girl.

When I suggested a trip to M part of me was edging the threesome idea on. When you said its not a good idea I agreed and I found alternative places to visit for our weekend trip.
You then said no lets do M.

When we got to M not once I suggested meeting your friend but you did and we did. I said lets go to the strip club for a laugh before we met your friend or you suggesting to meet your friend.

We was all drunk and you wanted to go strip club so badly. Yes I was the man two good looking girls in the club, you both dancing and winding and grinding now in a strip club.

I said strip club is not a good idea you was upset and I took you because you started moaning.

Yes we are all Horney and we fucked together. You went of crying and couldn’t handle it. You blame me till this day me putting the idea in your head. I hope you see one day it’s a joint responsivity.

Now B….I didn’t fuck the random girl you brought back A I promise from what I remember. Why did you bring a random girl back on our weekend away in B? You know I am on a threesome you bringing her back is suggesting it not?

You think I was not hurt when I got kicked out but you stayed in the club kissing a random girl?

Now we got over this did we not? You know deep down we did. We lived together for three months.

A I’m not going to go into detail here. I fought for us with my family. You know I am Pakistani / Muslim my parents beat me up. I had to run away from home because they never accepted you. They were racist. A I ran out of money and I was too scared to go home.

I just wanted you, and do everything with you. Money was my shortfall so I did what I did. A I was paying £160ish a day to stay in a hotel. Did you not for a moment sit back and force me to go home even though I was scared?

Money fucked me up because I could not afford it…could you not see that? Could you not see I was spending over £1,000 a week on a hotel excluding travel and food?

Did you use me? I know you didn’t and we was in love A I know we was. But common part of you didn’t want to help me fix things?

A you didn’t even give me a chance with the money. You really didn’t you lied to me about Jack. Christmas New Years and the whole of January was a hard month for me. I called Samaritans every night I was drinking and taking any drug I could get hold off.

I paid an escort £300 to be my friend for the night and have drinks with me at a bar…not to have sex. So I could feel safe when I found you and jack went away.

Do you not see? All my friends and family ties were broken down because I went out with you because of the difference in culture and religion. I did that because I love you and thought this was us and us forever. You say I thought for this freedom because I should be able to choose who I go out with.

Princess…….No one would drop their friends and family for a girl. Really I would have never done that but you was different for a man to do that for a female…it shows something. Did you ever take a step back think about it? Deep down I know you didn’t. I paid for friends with an escort who ended up robbing me. Seriously A?
I don’t hate you anymore. I love you and always will. I hope one day you realize A home fucked me up. But you didn’t have to tear up my heart and go off with another man.

I hope your happy. I hope this man is the one. I hope when you do realize you found someone better. Because getting back with you even after 1 year you sleeping with another man is something I can never do.

Love you lots,
Q
 
^Damn, that's a lot of shit.


My first world problems: aim has been compromised except on my laptop, but I contacted them for help. I guess I'll have to call. x_x

Just fought with my gf, but it's okay now.

Have hw, and reading to do.

GL. I'm glad my problems are somewhat normalized now...:)

The Irony: I will have to post here now. Congrats whoever did it. =P

Edit: As in good job for getting it handed back to you right here. :)

Karma is true. That's why it's karma. <3
 
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Every day it gets harder and harder to be apart from you. Whether you're ready or not, I'm going to have to say something soon because i want to spend every day together with you, or at least every weekend instead of every other, until you're ready to let me know what it is that you want, whether its to have something more serious or something more casual. I know that you'll come around at your own pace, but after waiting so many years, i don't want to wait any longer.
 
tathra said:
Every day it gets harder and harder to be apart from you.
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I was just going to say something pretty much alike when I've read what you have written above.
That longing feeling we have sometimes makes me so alive.
 
To my friends and family, I hate who I am now and keep myself away from all of you as much as I can. I'm a selfish, self centered drug dependent basket case.... to the teachers that discouraged me from bothering to try because I was a failure and would ' Amount to nothing' you were wrong, I proved you wrong and then through circumstance, weakness, bad health and even worse choices I have proved you right. You may now all rest easy knowing that I've reached my potential as you all said I would.

P.S - I used to earn much more than you teachers did when I was 17 yrs old, I mostly gave it away to my "friends" as teachers quite obviously don't understand how to generate wealth and the education system is designed to prepare its students to become employees and get a job to ensure you pay maximum tax to a Goverment that uses its citizens as collateral in order to borrow impossible amounts of money from the banks - their masters.

Your Government and its many arms like the Police force and Customs are private companies as are all of us who are traded on the the New York stock exchange. That's why you're Goverment requires your parents to register your Birth so a birth certificate can be created. Your Government creates a company using your name so that it can do business with you. Anytime you see your names in all CAPS (on your bills for example) that is you in your capacity as a company of which you should appoint yourself Director, that company is not you as a physical or spiritual being described as a "soul" under common law iirc.... but we are dealt with under Amiralty Maritime Law which is "The law of the sea" hence all the nautical terms used in life especially the courts, but terms like "Birth" and a "Birth certificate" are such nautical terms.

Due to our lack of knowledge we often allow our Government and it's assumed services like the Police to illegally (immorally) fine, detain and deal with us, control us through The Tax Ofiice, but they are taxing, fining and taking you as the company to court (your name in all Caps). If you end up in court you have already lost, you must establish yourself as the Director of your company by way of a letter to the court and include a question asking them to prove who they are and that they are the sovereign nation they claim to be and not a private company traded on the stock exchange. They can't prove it and there is a law that is supposed to give you the right to not appear if they do not respond to your letter and provide the proof of who they are within, from memory, something like 10 working days.

I think under common law (law of the land) it states that you waived your rights and are 'not of sound mind' if you request a lawyer or solicitor to represent you. You don't want to ever go to court, which is a sporting term, like tennis you use a racquet on a court and our courts are exactly that - a racket and a money making business.

Teach that in schools. Admiralty Maritime Law...... that's what is applied to us, it's really corporate law cos your name in all CAPS is a company of which you need to appoint yourself director.

We've been scammed, surprise surprise.
 
The kindness of a friend was all that was needed to light a fire under my ass. Thank you. And whatever I said in the Hospital? Please know that I was not in my right mind. Nor do I remember anything I said to you under the influence of Alice.
 
This girl lives in another country, she will never love you as strongly as I will. Get her out of the way, so we can move forward. I'm ready to begin my life with you in the right direction. I can not only take care of myself, but you can take care of me as well. And vice versa. She isn't coming back, and I will show you what love is. Please stop hurting me by letting her words get to your head. I love you, she doesn't.
 
My3sons said:
We are just friends and have been just friends for months. When we are awake and you try to have sex with me I say NO. What makes you think I am saying yes when I am sleeping? I am so upset and disgusted by what you did. When we were more than friends I told you to never touch me while I am asleep. I explained how violating it is to wake up to your fingers in my pussy. How dare you do that again? I had enough of your high pressure for sex. We are friends and will never be more. I cannot believe what I woke up to. I just pretended to sleep through the rest because I was so paralysed with disgust and discomfort that I didn't know what to do. I know you know why I am upset with you. Two days later you try again? I say no we are just friends. You wait until I am asleep and try to fuck me again? This time I found my voice and said stop. I'm glad you were gone by the time I woke up the next morning. I'm glad I haven't heard from you in 3 days. You know I don't like confrontation and talking about what you did and tried to do again is the last thing I want to do. But I know that you know what's wrong. Are you ashamed? How are you even turned on? You know that you violated me and left me feeling molested. I hope it was worth it.
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This is awful! So sorry this happened to you:/ I DETEST scumbags like this ( Adopt Zero tolerance for even the slightest whiff of this abusive manipulative shit anymore - i hope you know that should this EVER happen to you again - you are quite entitled to defend yourself from unwanted advances by ANY means - personally I recommend biting the face - a good scar may serve as a nice reminder to them!!!).

I hope you never let him into your life again - he sounds like someone who will always undermine and try to take advantage of you; has no respect for you but is too cowardly to say it to your face. Please look after yourself and establish the boundaries you need to keep this useless piece of shit out of your life.

Please learn to allow yourself to confront a person in a situation like this - it's extremely important for you and for any guy to know the line that can't be crossed - you need to practice this and not instruct but enforce your boundaries( it may be difficult at first but it is something you HAVE to do and it will serve you - guys like this DON'T CARE about how it makes you feel - you can not control this fact/deny it/wish it away - they are just self-serving and see you as an easy target - don't try to figure it out - they are just scum. It's that simple. It's nothing to do with you - it's their flaw).

You deserve much better for yourself and you need to keep reminding yourself of this -once you take a stand to these types you are more likely to be able to quickly recognise/root others like them out in the future and avoid them - it gets easier <3
 
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Margaret I love you and I always have, I know it's crazy but I can't stop thinking about you. I love you Margaret, I really do, and I'll stop using, if that's what it takes to get you back.
 
Asclepius- thx for your kind and encouraging words. I ended up cutting off the friendship and haven't seen him since that night. It's better off this way for every reason in the world. He lies about everything. They say once you are clean you're supposed to cut off people you used with. Its been almost 15 months for me. So for that reason alone it's better this way.
 
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