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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic

Ready for change

P

percojerk

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 7, 2014
Messages
166
Quick and to the point . I've been on an oxycodone run, up the nose about 90-120mg a day for a solid 2 months everyday . I am tired of the game and broke . I have 2 subs. My last 30mg dose of Percocet was 8 hours ago. I went and grabbed 2 8mg sub strips . What's my easiest way out using these 2 subs ? Thank you .
 
Take 4 mg, 24 hours later take another 4 mg, cut the 2nd strip into 4, 2mg pieces, on the 3rd day take 2mg, day 4 take 2mg cut the other 2 pieces in half and follow same steps. You will still experience some discomfort at the end and after the suboxone but it’s way better than cold turkey.
 
The worst wd symptom for me is the lack of energy!! Like the type where you can't even get out of bed! I can deal with all most everything else !
 
The Subs will def help in mitigating the initial strong wd symptoms and lethargy, just be ready for some of those symptoms to arise somewhat 24+ hours after final Sub dose. I can tell you personally that If you order some Kratom right now then you will be in an immensely better situation energy wise and all around really if you start taking 2 to 3 teaspoons of Kratom 24 hours after final Sub dose.
 
Yes the Kratom will help IMMENSELY with the lack of motivation and general feeling like shit that comes with opioid withdrawals.

Kratom can make you feel good and will give you energy better than a cup of coffee will.

HOWEVER, Kratom has alkaloids that act on opioid receptors. So if you start taking Kratom then your essentially still using. You'll experience withdrawals when you quit taking it, withdrawals similar to the withdrawals you experience now from the oxycodone.

You said in the OP that you're ready to stop and you're broke. So Kratom probably isn't what your looking for because if you take it then your still using and it costs money which you said you don't have.

A quick taper with those 2 8mg sub strips is your best bet. Something like what RaizByWolvz said would be best. Do something like:

Day 1: 4mg
Day 2: 4mg
Day 3: 2mg
Day 4: 2mg
Day 5: 1mg
Day 6: 1mg
Day 7: 0.5mg
Day 8: 0.5mg

Etc. You can play with the doses and adjust the taper how you think it'll work best.

But basically there isn't much you can do about the lack of motivation you'll experience both as you taper and for awhile after you jump off. It's part of the game unfortunately, you just need to readjust to life without drugs. Do some reading into PAWS (Post acute withdrawal symptoms).

Something that will help immensely but will not be easy to do at first: start exercising. Force yourself. It'll help you recover quicker so that your natural motivation/energy levels come back quicker. Exercise has been proven to help. If you just lay around you'll make things appear worse and you'll take longer to get back to normal.
 
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Sorry for the double post but I wanted to add this in case the OP wasn't already aware and I fell it should be in it's own separate post:

You need to wait until you are fully in withdrawals before taking the first sub dose otherwise you will likely experience precipitated withdrawals (precipitated withdrawals are HORRIBLE). The longer you wait the better. The exact amount of time you need to wait varies (could be up to 24 hours, could be more), mostly you need to be fully in withdrawals, not just experiencing the beginning stages of withdrawal. Do some research into Suboxone induction, there is questionnaire that scores how far into withdrawals you are (COWS score). I believe you need to score a 26 or higher before you're generally considered safe to take Suboxone.

Another trick people use to induce Suboxone is with small staggered doses. For example, they wait until they are fully in withdrawals then take a small dose like 1mg. They wait an hour or two and then take another small dose (like 1mg). They keep doing this until they don't feel sick anymore. Doing it this way helps to avoid precipitated withdrawals, but even doing it this way you should still wait until you're well into withdrawals before starting.
 
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I honestly really appreciate the time you guys take out of your lives to give me advice to my situation. It means a lot as I have zero support from anyone in real life . I will finish the night and see how I feel tomorrow. This is not my first rodeo . Just wanted a fresh and new response as I could of easily used the search button . I am a pill addict , and I need help . I can't stop on my own
 
There is a lot of help out there but none of it will really do you much good until you are truly ready to quit. Getting to the point where you are absolutely ready - really truly ready - often takes a lot (hitting ones own rock bottom, for instance though I don't believe you have to hit rock bottom to be ready to quit)

The problem, for me, is that I've never really truly wanted to quit. I think I've gotten close. I believed I really wanted to quit at times... But it never stuck and in retrospect I was lying to myself... I just didn't realize it at the time.

It's not unusual to feel like you won't be able to quit on your own. For a lot of people this is the case, just look at AA/NA. They believe they have no control over their drugs/alcohol and they have essentially reached out to a higher power for help (doesn't have to be God either). Something like AA/NA may help for you. There are rehabs, inpatient/outpatient programs etc.

Edit to add: I hope I don't seem like Im suggesting that you aren't ready to quit. That wasn't my intention, im just giving my experience.
 
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It’s all good Perc bro! If you need the extra support I absolutely recommend maybe hitting up some AA/NA any meetings. I don’t go anymore but when I first started breaking my addiction back in 2007, I couldn’t have done it without the program. Life does get so much better exponentially when we start to spend all that energy and time that we spend seeking and shooting dope on other stuff like rebuilding relationships with humans, doing better at work, making music, whatever your talents may be you’ll find out how refreshing it is. We are here for ya my man, please let us know how you are doing.
 
Ok thanks guys again . But I want to give you an idea of how bad my rational brain is at the moment . So like I said earlier, I did my last 30mg Roxie this morning around 8am . I am from the northeast United States. I had grabbed the 2 subs already . I am a waiter at a busy Italian restaurant. However today it happened to be slow . So mid shift I decided, because my messed up brain was getting bored , antsy , depressed, obsessive.... I ripped open a strip and put half under my tounge. About an hour later I said F it, I put the other half under my tounge! Work was slow so I was cut. This was late afternoon. Now I felt "ok" . I did a perc 30 at 8 am and a full 8mg sub by say 6-7pm. Now at this point I was feeling , ok. Slightly buzzed. I took about 1 mg of klonopin that i am prescribed also around 7pm. Now mind you I still had a full suboxone left. I asked a good friend for a loan for a week. So now I have cash in my pocket . And it's frigging burning a whole in there . Even with a full 8 mg sub in me, I call my dealer and go grab 8 perc 30's!!!!! Like , whats wrong with me. So I go get them , come home . I am sitting at my desk staring at those beautiful blue round pills . It's about 8:30 pm now. I couldn't resist. I lined 1 full blue up and sniffed it. Surprised I feel "something" so I immediately line another blue 30 up and sniff it. Now I know I am under the influence at this point from the oxy because I am not bored or depressed. I also like to watch YouTube videos while high . And weird, but I LOVE to go into the bathroom and "groom" my face in the mirror. Like using scissors, trimmers, tweezers and just kinda groom and compulsively trim and pluck and groom my facial hairs and eyebrows. It's so weird. Its unexplainable. Someone chime in on that one also. So a few hours go by and I say F it, line up another and walk to Walgreens and get shit I don't need. I comeback home eat a snack and watch YouTube for an hour. I get my clothes ready for work tomorrow. I hop on bluelight and just before I began to type this , I lined up another blue 30. It is now 1:13 am and I am just so speechless. Not that anyone is here , but I am like besides myself for a number of reasons. I guess I was looking for thoughts, input , ideas, explanations ect ect .
A) how did I even feel the oxy. I definitely do , while taking a whole sub only hours before. I am 39 male , 135lbs , SUPER fast metabolism.
B) it was like I had no control over calling my dealer

C) I am so pissed I spent that money knowing i had subs!

It's a cycle I don't know if I am strong enough or want to even break. I just proved to myself if I have money , I will break down and call my dealer . I am losing my train of thought. Please respond
 
I shaved once since I quit heroin so I feel you on that. There is something rather meditative about taking a good shave on opiates.
 
Dont put veet on your balls no matter how much you want heroin.
 
This thread has been hilariously sidetracked. On a more serious note . I just lined up another blue since finishing the last post I made in this thread. Unbelievable. Well what ever. ok I'm going to sleep . Looking forward to more responses tomorrow. Peace out. Remember guys , you are really my only support group . Gnight
 
Dude Im a year older than you and understand. I had to stop my entire life to stop opiates but if I had money and access Id be right back. I feel like a fucking monk just sitting around penniless and celibate.
 
It sounds like you're ready to make a change but part of you still craves the high. Have you considered opiate replacement therapy?
 
Yes I've tried . I did a whole 8mg sub , and then few hours later went and spent money I needed to fix my car and bought like 8 perc 30's and did like 4 that same night within 4 hours
 
That’s quite a debacle, if you’re anything like myself and most every other dope fiend you won’t be ready to quit til you’re in a trouble of sorts, rock bottom, call it what you will. In any case it seems as if suboxone just doesn’t work for you, have you thought about going to a Methadone clinic? It’s not something I’d suggest unless you really needed to get out of a rock bottom life, as I was in a withdrawal for a little over 2 months when I could no longer go to the clinic and did a cold turk. It’s definitely a gorilla on your back but if the alternative is wrecking your life then maybe methadone could help, again I don’t recommend this unless absolutely necessary but I’m throwing it out there
 
Sorry to hear you're struggling so much with the oxys. They certainly are a bitch! I hate to say this but I think the previous poster is right, you probably won't make a substantial go of quitting until you land in some deep do-do. It sounds like the drug totally consumes every decision you make right now. That my friend is a serious recipe for disaster and I'm pretty sure you know that already. I'm not sure what else to say but I really wish you all the best and I hope you don't drop too deep before turning things around.
 
Ok guys. Well I am still on the hampster wheel. Still owing , borrowing, and being sketchy to get my blue pills. I am actually sick and tired of it . Had a reality check last night after a blow out with some friends. Also been doing stupid shit I never thought I would be doing . Putting my job and essentially my apartment on the line . Been averaging around 90mg-150mg daily of Percocet. This morning I ran out and grabbed 1 suboxone. I took about 1/2- 3/4 of it . Closer too 2/3's. My plan is to use this (1) sub to get over any physical wd from stopping the perc's. Not much to work with, but 1 sub can be stretched out a lot I am assuming. Enough at least to get me by the acute wd . Thoughts guys? I am sooo low and in a bad spot. I blame nobody but myself. I need to get myself out of this . I have 0 support besides you guys !
 
What are your options in terms of pursuing something like Detox OP? What state do you live in? Buprenorphine (Suboxone/Subutex) can be awesome resources for a DIY withdrawal process, but if you can't control yourself enough to make that happen, it might be time to give the authority to others in the meantime. You could attend a detox long enough to get over the most serious aspects of your withdrawal and could even be set up with a maintenance program in the detox. Get back to me with that information!
 
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