As has already been said, approaching psychedelics with depression can go either way. As such, and considering it's your first time (and presumably you live with your parents), I'd recommend a low dose.
My personal direct experience with psychedelics is that a low-ish dose of mushrooms will provide a depression reset for
two or three days after the trip.
This reset of your depression symptoms should be seen as a WINDOW and nothing more.
If you genuinely want this to work then you should really take my words seriously and consider writing up a plan of action and using this window of happiness to do healthy proactive things which make you happy and can alleviate depression in the long term.
The list which I usually suggest is the following:
Eating healthy (green smoothies are perfect for this. Kind of like a healthy milkshake if done right)
Walking in nature (forests are perfect for this)
Meditation (perhaps
while walking in nature?)
Exercise (running, cycling, walking long distances)
Yoga
Reading
Music (preferably positive stuff)
Creative stuff
I really think that for anybody to be happy you generally need to have the following in check:
physical health (exercise, eating healthy food, yoga, walking, etc)
mental health (meditation, yoga, producing music, playing instruments, writing, etc)
No offence, I hate to presume, but if you're depressed then you're probably doing very little of these things.
Some of these really are core elements of being happy. For example:
If you don't eat a healthy diet than your body can't function optimally.
If you don't exercise then your body doesn't release adequate endorphins.
If you don't meditate then your mind will run of its own accord, unchecked, and will generally think about negative stuff.
If you don't walk in nature then you're missing out on what millions years of being alive on a planet were really all about.
Basically everything runs out of balance. Your body and your mind don't like that. If your mind is unhealthy then it can cause physical illness. If your body is unhealthy then it can cause mental illness.
Please bare this in mind and prepare for it. Otherwise you're (highly likely) going to spend 3-4 days doing the usual shit you do (television, bad food, negative thoughts) feeling fucking brilliant about how the worlds not so bad after all...
Then you're going to wake up on day four in the same old routine and nothing will have changed and you'll be depressed all over again.
Your life is trying to tell you something. Use this knowledge wisely.
If the mushrooms present you with a window, then use it. Positive, healthy stuff is the answer.
there's so much out there for you man. For me. For all of us. You just gotta know what you want. And always remember being sullen is a waste of energy. Trust me I know what it feels like. Pain a funny thing when you can't figure out the source. I never knew why I was depressed. That was the catch. I believe it's because I didn't know how to be happy.
Hallucinogens made me realize what can easily make me happy. They've helped a lot and I don't recklessly binge on pharms anymore. I've grown to be more responsible.
Im only 18.
I wouldn't reccomend you do any psyches if you have mental illness tho. I've seen some of my friends lose themselves on the journey. You gotta be careful and if you do go ahead with tripping, don't do it alone.
Bang on. Wise words.
And that reminds me - if you've suffered hallucinations and paranoia in your past, then psychedelics can be a bad idea. They can really exasperate these kind of things. You really need to take this into account.
i'm wising that on your darkest nights you don't feel alone and that one day you are happy and free. i wish for you to be your own you know i wish for you.
