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(on having never visited the Louvre despite living in Paris for two years)

"Why come to Paris and go to the only place in the city where you can't smoke?"
. --- David Sedaris, July 2000
 
"Tell people there is an invisible man in the sky that created the universe and the vast majority will believe you,tell them the paint is wet and they have to touch it to make sure" George Carlin
 
Bow down and accept your fate if you're praying to God
Then you're praying too late and all the right things
you've learned are wrong
Brothers and sisters we are not alone

We are the nightmares that you cannot dream
An intergalactic killing machine
An eye is upon you your future is doomed
All hypnotized by the hollow moon

Everybody keep watching the skies
Everything you know is a lie
From the day you were born
You were born to die
Everything you know is a lie

No way, do you have a chance
The government's got you in a trance
And now you're on the way to the body bag
Just keep falling for the old false flag

We are the nightmares that you cannot dream
An intergalactic killing machine
An eye is upon you your future is doomed
All hypnotized by the hollow moon

Everybody keep watching the skies
Everything you know is a lie
From the day you were born
You were born to die
Everything you know is a lie


'keep watching the skies'

By
Wednesday 13
 
"You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think" - Dorothy Parker
 
Swing from the gallows
It's been my destiny
And everywhere that I roam
I spread this blasphemy
Now I'm, a bad, bad, man
My name you should not speak
I prey on the innocent
The powerless and weak

You, made me a monster
And now the monster, he's out on the loose

On the loose
I am a madman on the streets
Now don't ever forget
That you created me
Now look, into my eyes
And take your final breath
My hands, around your throat
Just one more last caress
It's because...

You, made me a monster
And all I wanna do is dismember you
Made me a monster
And now the monster's coming after you
Made this creation
Causing all this devastation
You, made me a monster
And now the monster, he's out on the loose
 
The Arrow and the Song

I shot an arrow into the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where;
For, so swiftly it flew, the sight
Could not follow it in its flight.

I breathed a song into the air,
It fell to earth, I knew not where;
For who has sight so keen and strong,
That it can follow the flight of song?

Long, long afterward, in an oak
I found the arrow, still unbroke;
And the song, from beginning to end,
I found again in the heart of a friend.

—Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
 
“When you start thinking about what people like, you start thinking about what people expect. Then you start pandering to people's expectations. . . . I'd rather fail gloriously making something strange, awesome but ultimately a failure.”
–Anthony Bourdain
 
“One does not choose to live in a van. Life deals you a set of cards, and they're all jokers.”
Chabuddy G

“The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.”
Dr. Evil

“Everything that glitters ain't fishscale
Lemme think, don't let her faint get Ishmael
A shot of Jack got her back it's not an act stack
Forgot about the cackalack, holla back, clack clack blocka
Villainy, feel him in ya heart chakra, chart toppa
Start shit stoppa be a smart shoppa”
Madvillain (MF DOOM in "Figaro" from Madvillainy)

“When you feel like the purpose of your life is to gratify yourself and get things for yourself and go all the time, there's this other part of you that's the same part that is almost hungry for silence and quiet and thinking really hard about the same thing for maybe half an hour instead of thirty seconds, that doesn't get fed at all. And it makes itself felt in the body in a kind of dread, in here. And I don't know whether that makes a whole lot of sense. But I think it's true that here in the US, every year the culture gets more and more hostile -- and I don't mean hostile like angry -- just, it becomes more and more difficult to ask people to read, or to look at a piece of art for an hour, or to listen, to listen to a piece of music that's complicated and that takes work to understand, because -- well, there are a lot of reasons -- but, particularly now in the computer and internet culture everything's so fast, and the faster things go the more we feed that part of ourselves but don't feed the part of ourselves that likes quiet, that can live in quiet, that can live without any kind of stimulation.”
David Foster Wallace
 
The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie — deliberate, contrived and dishonest — but the myth — persistent, persuasive, and unrealistic.
 
“Give me an underground laboratory, half a dozen atom-smashers, and a beautiful girl in a diaphanous veil waiting to be turned into a chimpanzee, and I care not who writes the nation's laws.”
– S.J. Perelman

“Every existing thing is born without reason, prolongs itself out of weakness, and dies by chance.”
– Jean-Paul Sartre

"I know what you're asking yourself and the answer is yes. I have a nick name for my penis. Its called the Octagon, but I also nick named my testes - my left one is James Westfall and my right one is Dr. Kenneth Noisewater. You ladies play your cards right you just might get to meet the whole gang."
– Brian Fantana

“Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting.”
– Unknown

“In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.”
– George Orwell

“He who marches out of step hears another drum.”
– Ken Kesey

“The root of all suffering is attachment."
– Buddha

“From now on you're the Magic Man and I’m El Diablo."
– Ricky Bobby

"Art decorates space. Music decorates time."
– Kaiser Synthesizer
 
“Give me an underground laboratory, half a dozen atom-smashers, and a beautiful girl in a diaphanous veil waiting to be turned into a chimpanzee, and I care not who writes the nation's laws.”
– S.J. Perelman

“Every existing thing is born without reason, prolongs itself out of weakness, and dies by chance.”
– Jean-Paul Sartre

"I know what you're asking yourself and the answer is yes. I have a nick name for my penis. Its called the Octagon, but I also nick named my testes - my left one is James Westfall and my right one is Dr. Kenneth Noisewater. You ladies play your cards right you just might get to meet the whole gang."
– Brian Fantana

“Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting.”
– Unknown

“In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.”
– George Orwell

“He who marches out of step hears another drum.”
– Ken Kesey

“The root of all suffering is attachment."
– Buddha

“From now on you're the Magic Man and I’m El Diablo."
– Ricky Bobby

"Art decorates space. Music decorates time."
– Kaiser Synthesizer
"Fuck it all"
Lenny Bruce
 
"It is the critic's job to educated the public. It is the artist's job to educate the critic."
– Oscar Wilde

"If you don't know where a particular quote came from, just attribute it to Oscar Wilde and you'll sound smarter."
– Oscar Wilde
 
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