• H&R Moderators: VerbalTruist | cdin | Lil'LinaptkSix

October Getting/Staying Clean/Sober Thread v. Jack-o'-lanterns and drag queens

Benchmark! :) Proud of you dude, you're an inspiration. I can still remember when you were coming off buprenorphine back when I had started formal buprenorphine outpatient treatment. You've come a long way. We both have. Yay! ;) <3
 
congrats, everyone--especially MBC and CH! you guys inspire me. (of course everyone on SL inspires me, but credit where credit is due! :))

i got almost two months clean in August and September, then slipped back, but am determined to bring everything i've got to my recovery now.

day 4 for me. the worst of the wds seem to be receding.
 
Second the neck massage. Mine gets really tense, sometimes to the point I can't completely turn my head and I will schedule a massage. I'm right as rain after the massage. I recommend getting a deep tissue or shiatsu massage with biofreeze - very effective.
 
Captain: Congratulations on 2 years!! You are such an awesome presence here on BL!
 
7 days today. Not sure what to attribute it to, but I'm feeling pretty steady. My first week clean since finishing my psych hospitalization.
 
My husband got to see his estranged daughter last night after four years. I am very happy for them because they need to be in each other's lives but I am also very apprehensive because she doesn't like me and it caused a lot of drama when we got married. She has(had?) addiction problems and didn't like that I educated him about addiction and enabling. I plan on not being involved unless it's what they both want as their relationship is important, I don't think I am a necessary part of the equation. I just hope all goes smoothly, but I am still apprehensive because whole thing was somewhat traumatic for me. I would love for us to be on good terms and she could visit more regularly and do holiday's with her Dad in the future. Finger crossed.
 
^
Sounds like you're handling an irreducibly thorny situation really well, Moreaux. Godspeed!
 
Nine days clean and I'm mending. Insomnia is the last symptom standing from my WDs, though I've always been an insomniac. I don't care much about not being able to sleep. But my mind really fucks with me in the small hours. That's when the shame, guilt, fear, etc. regarding both my addiction and my recovery really come out to play. The lack of sleep and the intense emotions are starting to wear on me.

But thankfully, even though I feel pretty shitty, I have only short-lived thoughts of using. Sometimes hours pass with no cravings at all. The cravings that do come are, for some reason, not as overwhelming as the ones that tanked my endless previous efforts to clean up.

I suppose I could use an 'atta-boy today if anyone's feeling generous! :\
 
Simco -

9 days is incredible! You are doing awesome. The insomnia stage is awful, but don't worry, it passes. I had insomnia for the first 3-4 weeks, and then it changed from insomnia to fatigue. But I would much rather be exhausted and able to sleep than exhausted and unable to sleep.

Hang in there!

- VE
 
Feeling better today.

I'm in an intensive outpatient rehab right now, and it's very 12-step, abstinence-only in its focus. Last week, I felt worn down by the counselors' endless chorus that I need to stop smoking weed. So I decided to abstain from it for a while. Last night, though, I was feeling so wound I up that I went ahead and vaped... followed by my first decent night's sleep in many days. Wow, the world looks nicer after a little rest.

I hope everyone has a great day.
 
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