My experience with MDMA / Ecstasy !

[Bearlove]

Hey everyone,

There seems to be so much mis-information being spread around this section at the moment. I honestly feel that this is down to people repeating, what they heard from a friend of a friend who read something on the internet one day.

Before we even go any further - If you have not tested your gear and your unsure if what you are taking is MDMA then stop reading - this is not a thread about Molly, Moonrocks, Saff, Sass, Mandy, Crystal, Methylone, or- you get the jist *enter the dealer slang name here*.

Where do I go from here - ...?

Dose ? After reading these threads and the reports on Pillreports - people seem to enjoy dose range from between 50 -150 as a starter dose. I personally wouldn't even bother with a dose of 50mgs and I would consider a dose of around 100+ mgs as a decent dose. 120-150 being the sweet spot for a lot of people in the UK where a lot of people in the US found one Pokeball (tested at 90mg) to be the sweet spot. This really depends on tolerance and body size as explained by 'Struttergear' - here . Lower doses may be for personal meditation etc.

How to redose - safely = Do not! Realistically then depending what you want from the drug then drop every couple of hours - are you going to continue to 'roll' then no your not. Will the MDMA have an effect - of course it will, but your more likely to feel either a speedy high or a mongy / heavy / stoned high compared to the initial rush. How often can you do this - as often as you wish but you have to understand that with repeated doses the comedown / crash is going to be stronger (and the risk of damage increases). Is there any proof of the long term damage of MDMA use (I am not talking about the odd random person taking stupid doses)?

I think so many people in the US have become so scared about 'losing the magic' that the are now afraid to take MDMA - losing the magic is an American term and not something even talked about in the UK. If you have a heavy weekend - you have a couple of weeks off (or a few days for the next weekend).

In short - lets stop the scaremongering. Your not going to 'lose the magic' after a heavy weekend, your not going to end up with lasting depression after rolling two weekends in a row.

If your feeling the negative effects of MDMA then wait until they have passed before popping another pill?

I have been taking MDMA for over 20 years - I have taken multiple doses daily, weekly and monthly. Have I experienced 'any' long term lasting effects - none that I can attribute to MDMA alone.

 

[Mailmonkey]

Great post bearlove.

Is it a thread? Fir adding your own experiences to?

I have a lot of ecstasy experiences, and feel my input may be valid.

i'm going off to watch my son in his school Christmas play now, will add something here when I get back if it's welcome.

:D

 

[breakcorefiend]

hey everyone,

there seems to be so much mis-information being spread around this section at the moment. I honestly feel that this is down to people repeating, what they heard from a friend of a friend who read something on the internet one day.

Before we even go any further - if you have not tested your gear and your unsure if what you are taking is mdma then stop reading - this is not a thread about molly, moonrocks, saff, sass, mandy, crystal, methylone, or- you get the jist *enter the dealer slang name here*.

Where do i go from here - ...?

Dose ? After reading these threads and the reports on pillreports - people seem to enjoy dose range from between 50 -150 as a starter dose. I personally wouldn't even bother with a dose of 50mgs and i would consider a dose of around 100+ mgs as a decent dose. 120-150 being the sweet spot for a lot of people in the uk where a lot of people in the us found one pokeball (tested at 90mg) to be the sweet spot. This really depends on tolerance and body size as explained by 'struttergear' - here . Lower doses may be for personal meditation etc.

How to redose - safely = do not! Realistically then depending what you want from the drug then drop every couple of hours - are you going to continue to 'roll' then no your not. Will the mdma have an effect - of course it will, but your more likely to feel either a speedy high or a mongy / heavy / stoned high compared to the initial rush. How often can you do this - as often as you wish but you have to understand that with repeated doses the comedown / crash is going to be stronger (and the risk of damage increases). Is there any proof of the long term damage of mdma use (i am not talking about the odd random person taking stupid doses)?

I think so many people in the us have become so scared about 'losing the magic' that the are now afraid to take mdma - losing the magic is an american term and not something even talked about in the uk. If you have a heavy weekend - you have a couple of weeks off (or a few days for the next weekend).

In short - lets stop the scaremongering. Your not going to 'lose the magic' after a heavy weekend, your not going to end up with lasting depression after rolling two weekends in a row.

If your feeling the negative effects of mdma then wait until they have passed before popping another pill?

I have been taking mdma for over 20 years - i have taken multiple doses daily, weekly and monthly. Have i experienced 'any' long term lasting effects - none that i can attribute to mdma alone.

qft

 

[StrutterGear]

Thread stickied. All are encouraged to post their experiences.

 

[JWills20]

Agreed. Harm Reduction is all about fact-based recommendations not scare-mongering. Saying you will lose 'the magic' if you roll 2 weekends in a row is as bad as the Government saying 'Ecstasy will put holes in your brain.'

Realistic, fact-based recommendations are what this forum should be all about and is why I liked it far more over other forums. No Bullshit. No 'swim.' All about just saying it how it is.

 

[Bearlove]

YES this is a thread - YES you are not only allowed but encouraged to post your true experiences with MDMA / E. Yeah if it turns into some bragging threads about how many pills you have taken, then the mods will rightly close it down.

This IS NOT the place to try and 'brag/ show off about how many pills you have taken - this is simply a thread to talk about your usage in an honest way. I know for a fact that a lot of people in the UK use pills in a different way compared to our American users - this is not about taking the piss, trolling etc.

In the UK when real MDMA pills were super cheap (years of the Love Hearts/Smurfs) etc then I personally would have no problem with doing 10+ per night - every week for months on end. I would feel like shit for a few days - but come the next weekend I would be doing it all again. 10 years forward - MDMA still rocks my world! Take a decent dose and eyes rolling in the back of my head, haunted jaw, talking bullshit to my newest 'best friend ever' - who I forget in 5 seconds and move on.

Is it the same as 20 years ago - NO but what is?

 

[StoneHappyMonday]

I have a long term usage of MDMA similar to Bearlove. First E in 1989 though first offered one in 1987. Turned it down, £25. I really did say "fuck off with your bourgeois drugs". My excuse is I was taking acid, regularly, at £2 a tab. And I think revolution is a good idea.

Used quite regularly until 1994 then met my current girlfriend and took it together two to three times a week every week for three solid years. We only had a slight break at that point because the first major drought kicked in.

I'm not going to go on about how better the E was then. It just was.

I never did E in an indoor club for years, though I did go to outdoor raves occasionally. Not a mad raver, though we did quite a few. Our ecstasy use became mainly an indoor thing with friends, and our own sounds. Fuck the DJ. Maybe it helped I lived in a massive flat in Maida Vale with plenty of room to dance around in. After a while most of my drug using friends moved out of London and ecstasy started to become a little more to do with sex than dancing.

Then it became a lot to do with sex. Still to our own playlists. But yeah, sex took over. And I'm glad it did. I've had decades of MDMA induced pleasure and the only problems Ive encountered along the way (apart from the brain zaps, briefly , in 1997) have been the ridiculous double life's I have to play with the real world on a weekday.

Thank you Mr Shulgin.

 

[bogman]

it was around xmas 1993 when i had my first pill, a White Dove and it was not that great to be honest.the pills were a poor copycat of the famous dove, even the dealer told us they were not great and charged us £12 instead of £15.

the 2nd pill was a blank cannon ball or snowball and was fucking brillant, blew my head clean off and i danced like a madman for hours. after that MDMA has being a very big part of my life with very few bad experiences.

have lost count of the times i have taken pills but would be 400+ and how many pills i have taken. from around 1995 to 1999 then 2003 to now i would have taken pills 4 days in a row a few times or taken pills maybe 18 wends out of 20.

between 1999 and 2001 i would have only taking pills maybe 3 times and during that time i dont think i felt any different that the times i was out most wends.

yes i have had a few times where Tuesday and Wednesday were hell but i would have went without food and sleep for 3 days and 2 nights plus drank a lot.have had some great nights on 1 or 2 pills and have also done 30+ pills in a single session or 50+ pills over a wend.

after these wends i would get the horrible dreams and the brain zaps but this would last 2 or 3 nights at most then its back thinking about pills, getting pills, taking pills.

i dont think i have done a physical or mental damage to myself in this time, yes i have being ill a few times but so have mates who dont do drugs. would have had a few medical exams last few years and no problems being found so far.

the only downside to my life of MDMA is on one side is the law, if im ever caught i will be in a lot of trouble with family and work and the other side of things not all the people who you have to deal with to get drugs are nice people.

having to deal with scum bags and muppets a part of this i dont like but drugs are illegal so what choice do you have.

im almost 19 years taking pills and now over 40 years old, can i see my self ever stopping = i dont know, what i do know is i will be taking less drugs less often ok and save my drugs and nights out for special times.

 

[Bearlove]

^ Hey Bogman, thank you for your post - as always your insight is greatly appreciated.

When you took pills for a few weekends in a row did you notice and reduced effects? Did you find the following days after you stopped any worse than the normal come down (say if you only took one weekend)? When you restarted did you notice any reduced effects down to tolerance ?

 

[bogman]

^ Hey Bogman, thank you for your post - as always your insight is greatly appreciated.

When you took pills for a few weekends in a row did you notice and reduced effects? Did you find the following days after you stopped any worse than the normal come down (say if you only took one weekend)? When you restarted did you notice any reduced effects down to tolerance ?

would have went clubbing back in the day wend after wend and never noticed much difference unless the pills were poor quality.

did notice on the crazy wends that by Sunday i was getting very little affect from the pills and would be taking silly amounts.

 

[Munroe]

@bogman, weren't the Latvian snowballs fairly high dose MDA around that time?

(just as an aside, doesn't make any odds to your post like.)

 

[alasdairm]

Agreed. Harm Reduction is all about fact-based recommendations not scare-mongering. Saying you will lose 'the magic' if you roll 2 weekends in a row is as bad as the Government saying 'Ecstasy will put holes in your brain.'

the fact is that mdma is illegal in most places and, as a result, facts on use and abuse are hard to come by and the dangers are, inevitably, less well known. opinion is plentiful.

this is a discussion of degree and there's no reason it can't be civil. from an hr perspective, understating the frequency with which one should use mdma to be safe is as, if not more, harmful as/than exaggerating it. there's no reason that statements like "i take it weekly and i seem fine. your mileage may vary" and "you should take a 3-month break to be safe" can't coexist. either party inflating the authority of their statements is a problem, in my opinion.

i don't believe the ed staff or any forum participant should ever be criticised for erring on the side of caution.

alasdair

 

[Folley]

In short - lets stop the scaremongering. Your not going to 'lose the magic' after a heavy weekend, your not going to end up with lasting depression after rolling two weekends in a row.

I agree. It's long term abuse of MDMA that causes this to occur.

If you have a heavy weekend - you have a couple of weeks off (or a few days for the next weekend).

I have been taking MDMA for over 20 years - I have taken multiple doses daily, weekly and monthly. Have I experienced 'any' long term lasting effects - none that I can attribute to MDMA alone.

So the point of this thread is to say we should not say to space their rolls out? That I cannot agree to. Now I want to make it clear right now, I HAVE NEVER said one "heavy weekend" or even a few weekends in a row would lead to lasting depression

If you asked me if I thought taking 3 grams over a weekend would lead to that, I would say no.


But LONG TERM, constant abuse of the drug has been shown time and time again to lower 5-HT axon density and deregulate the serotonin system greatly. Like wise, there have been studies done showing that imbalances of serotonin are directly linked to mood disorders like depression, anxiety and in some severe cases derealization and depersonalization. Now, if you have naturally high levels of serotonin yeah you might be more resistant to this, but not immune. On the other hand however there are people like myself who had underlying disorders that the drug set off still need the kind of help that people like myself have been giving. Some people take Shulgin's advice word for word... I don't put all that much stock in it however.



I used to say the same things as a lot of you, I could roll weekly with no "problems". But for one those rolls sucked balls because serotonergic tolerance builds VERY fast and even the best MDMA pills all that was on my mind was getting back to that FIRST roll, and two it set me up for a neurological disaster. Abuse of MDMA is no easy thing, and the drug can be very forgiving but for some extremely heavy abusers like me it can be extremely harmful and dangerous drug.











Go ahead and roll... I won't stop you, I don't WANT to stop you. And if there is a GREAT DJ the next week you just can't miss? Go roll there too! Hell, and maybe you fuck up and roll the next day, it happens. Then take a long break to recover from the blow your serotonin system takes, and when you're feeling ready to roll again go ahead, but try and use the drug safely next time because if you make a habit of it it can be very detrimental to your mental health.

That is my message.

I just want people to understand that MDMA releases massive amounts of serotonin, and time IS needed to recover and repair the small amount of damage that is done after a single use.


I don't see how that message could cause such an uproar, so I assume this thread isn't about anything I said... I just decided to respond anyway

 

[acieed_ed]

My introduction to mdma happened in 1993 when i was 14.
I was already a staunch dance music fan and was curious to try ecstasy but i was v young and what put me off then was the inaccurate gossip/scare mongering i had heard from older teenagers who had tried them ie. Rumours like you will get lock jaw or you would dance uncontrolably for hours till ur joints seized up! Conplete nonsense.
Anyway i took the plunge in 1994 when i was 15 (too young).
I was brought to this notorious all night dance club in dublin (the asylum) it had no alcohol licence so it could legally stay open all night and hold under 18's nights.
My mates who were older than me got us some MB (mad bastards) ecstasy pills. They were high dose so we took them in halfs.
Well after an hour i was in love lol the vibe was electric and i was talking total strangers and even hugging them lol.
Started regular mdma use around 1999 every weekend. On average 10/15 pills every weekend. Held down a responsible job and things were going well.
By 2001 my weekly use has escalated to 20+ pills at the weekend it was starting to affect my job with lateness and mon morn absences not to mention the famous mid week blues.
I realised i had a problem and sought professional help. I was detoxed from ecstasy in hospital and then when i was clear i went into rehab for six weeks.
I wish it had ended there and i moved on but i was addicted to the feeling off e and the whole scene. I went on to take increasingly high doses with predictable results..easy to see with hindsight.
Suffice to say i stopped taking e regulary in around 2006/7.
I rarely if ev takay more more ion

 

[Munroe]

So the point of this thread is to say we should not say to space their rolls out?

The point of this thread was detailed by Bearlove.

YES this is a thread - YES you are not only allowed but encouraged to post your true experiences with MDMA / E. Yeah if it turns into some bragging threads about how many pills you have taken, then the mods will rightly close it down.

This IS NOT the place to try and 'brag/ show off about how many pills you have taken - this is simply a thread to talk about your usage in an honest way. I know for a fact that a lot of people in the UK use pills in a different way compared to our American users - this is not about taking the piss, trolling etc.

In the UK when real MDMA pills were super cheap (years of the Love Hearts/Smurfs) etc then I personally would have no problem with doing 10+ per night - every week for months on end. I would feel like shit for a few days - but come the next weekend I would be doing it all again. 10 years forward - MDMA still rocks my world! Take a decent dose and eyes rolling in the back of my head, haunted jaw, talking bullshit to my newest 'best friend ever' - who I forget in 5 seconds and move on.

Is it the same as 20 years ago - NO but what is?

 

[acieed_ed]

Just as a quick follow up to my post i would like to point out that i am from ireland where a binge culture exists with drink drugs so i expect people to respect my honesty and not try to ridecule me based on their v limited exp if they are new to the game.
I am 33 and have 18 years expierence.
I certainly DONT advocate heavy use at all results are predictable.
But i havnt ended up a braindamaged cripple like steven hawkings as predicted by misinformed or misguided posters in ed back in 2001 when i was a member here too.

I would just like to add that i did try to research the effects of ecstasy back in the early days by borrowing library books about drugs,it was 93/94 internet access was not widespread in most homes at the time and online resources about drugs were obscure or didnt exist.
Anyway the books i borrowed only contained info about hasish,lsd,cocaine,solvents,dmt etc mdma/ecstasy was relatively new and the books were a few year old so i struck out.
But there is no need to rely on word of mouth/rumours these days with the wide availablilty info online.

 

[StoneHappyMonday]

I used to say the same things as a lot of you,

Dont wish to sound patronising, it's just a straight fact, but I've been in my current relationship, and taking MDMA, for longer than you've been alive. So when you say "I used to" and I say "I used to" there's just a little bit of difference in perspective. Y'ken?

That is my message.

You are not the Messiah.

 

[Bearlove]

I agree. It's long term abuse of MDMA that causes this to occur.

Can you show me the study that links long term MDMA use (I am not talking about abuse and I certainly have never suggested abusing any drug is safe or without risks) causes problems ?

So the point of this thread is to say we should not say to space their rolls out? That I cannot agree to. Now I want to make it clear right now, I HAVE NEVER said one "heavy weekend" or even a few weekends in a row would lead to lasting depression

No and that is not even suggested anywhere in this post or ANY of my posts on here.

But LONG TERM, constant abuse of the drug has been shown time and time again to lower 5-HT axon density and deregulate the serotonin system greatly. Like wise, there have been studies done showing that imbalances of serotonin are directly linked to mood disorders like depression, anxiety and in some severe cases derealization and depersonalization. Now, if you have naturally high levels of serotonin yeah you might be more resistant to this, but not immune. On the other hand however there are people like myself who had underlying disorders that the drug set off still need the kind of help that people like myself have been giving. Some people take Shulgin's advice word for word... I don't put all that much stock in it however.

Constant abuse of any drug is can lead to problems - chronic smokers do not all die of cancer, chronic drinkers do not all die of cirrhosis so long term users of MDMA do not all get manic depression etc. YES the chances are increased but having a couple of heavy weekends a few times a year is NOT abuse, it's certainly not advised as safe but the dangers and risks should not be blown out of proportions as is happening in here. IF you have underlying problems then the use of drugs can make them worse. If you check my posting history you will always see that when people who are taking medication for depression etc I advise them that taking MD.. isn't recommended.

People (especially US teens) seem to think that taking more than 2 pills a night = death sentence. They have one heavy night and start to believe SS and lasting depression and the threads on here are proof of it.

Of course the less you take the safer your going to be and I would always err on the side of caution with any drug - but we need to be realistic and stop the scaremongering.

 

[Folley]

Constant abuse of any drug is can lead to problems - chronic smokers do not all die of cancer, chronic drinkers do not all die of cirrhosis so long term users of MDMA do not all get manic depression etc. YES the chances are increased but having a couple of heavy weekends a few times a year is NOT abuse, it's certainly not advised as safe but the dangers and risks should not be blown out of proportions as is happening in here. IF you have underlying problems then the use of drugs can make them worse. If you check my posting history you will always see that when people who are taking medication for depression etc I advise them that taking MD.. isn't recommended.

This is true, but the problem is that people are having "heavy weekend" every few months or more and still taking the same breaks in between. Just because you feel fine after MDMA doesn't mean it's time to drop again, it means you're slowly getting used to lowered serotonin levels...


Now, if someone was to come into ED and make a thread saying they took a gram over the weekend and felt awful, you know what I would tell them? That they would be fine, eventually. I would say that they should take a longer break that usual after that kind of abuse, and probably recommend they take the 3 month break as is common around here. I would give them the information on how that kind of use can be damaging to their health, and tell them simple ways they can avoid these damages. I would NOT try and scare them away from MDMA, but rather give them the facts on how to use it safely next time.

I don't see how this could have caused such a problem 8( I will agree to try and be more careful with the way I word my posts, but I still do not believe this thread was aimed at me... honestly, I don't really see much of what has been said in this thread from anyone.

Of course the less you take the safer your going to be and I would always err on the side of caution with any drug - but we need to be realistic and stop the scaremongering.

I really don't see the kind of "scaremongering" you're talking about... can you quote some examples? So I know what to look for at the least? You don't have to include the names, but shit if it's me put my ass on full blast.






I'll see about finding some studies when I am not intoxicated

 

[Bearlove]

^My original post was not aimed at you, I replied to your concerns directly as above. Nothing you have said regarding harm reduction has led to a problem and, as stated above I would advise the same thing. Test your gear, take regular breaks, don't take stupid amounts - to advise anything other is counter productive and pretty much the opposite what the section is about.

What we have to do though is be realistic and honest about our experiences and about the information that we know to be true. If you for one minute forget what you know about MDMA and just have a quick read of the threads you would be giving the impression that its a really dangerous chemical. So many threads state - Do not take more than two doses per session (I understand the logic behind this), do not take more than once every three months (I understand the logic behind this), if you break these rules then your in for trouble.

Too many people are obsessed with 'losing the magic' and 'serotonin syndrome' that the fun is being removed from the experience and people are taking MDMA thinking they are running a real risk of long term brain damage after a few pills. In reality it is not like that - this thread has been made for people to share their real experiences (not for dicksizing, not to promote drug abuse, not to say that 'Im ok so you will be') but as a way to balance the information. You have read the threads where people are convinced they have lasting brain damage after one weekend out - they are getting this idea from somewhere. Lets make a start to give balanced information based not only on what we have read but what we have also experienced.

This thread is not about your comments or your conduct and your are as welcome as any other poster to share your experiences etc.