Benzos My doctor pulled me of valium, 10-15mg a day for 6 months as of today, wtf do I even do?

[Neuroborean]

Mulungu bark as well.

yeah, I forgot about that! it's probably one the best, but I never found a good batch, so I cannot tell personally, but I've heard super positive reviews.

 

[JackARoe]

^Yes the batch matters with Mulungu. Like kratom. I believe what kratom is to opiates mulungu is to benzos. But batch matters and when I found a good batch I bought a lot. It takes a good handful simmered for a bit to work. But it is undeniable and we will hear more in the future about this.

 

[Mr. Krinkle]

Yeah... I'm still doing alright, it's been about 72 hours, so there's probably like 3mg of Valium in me right now. But since doses add up I assume it could take a week to feel withdrawal. Or maybe the Gabapentin is really hiding it. Weeds been helping me with the anxiety a lot

you might be ok and not end up with any noticeable withdrawals.....but if you do, i'd say call them and tell them and then they may decide to taper you


like @JackARoe was saying, and i also believe it does take work to get addicted to them and i abused the shit out of them recreationally for years and i never had a withdrawal

keep us posted - im interested to see if you end up with withdrawals or not (i got my money on not)

 

[BourbonMac]

The prozac withdrawals are kicking my ass the most. One day I think, finally, it's over, but then the brain zaps can return. So much for "you can quit prozac CT, it has no withdrawal" from my GP. Kratom completely gets rid of the zaps. I remember having this issue years back, I thought kratom withdrawal was causing the zaps, but then I found out it was kratom covering up the Prozac withdrawal. I hate how long this shit lasts in your body... 25 days?

My anxiety, depression & C-PTSD reached an extreme point today. Mostly because of physical pain which I have not been responding to mentally very well for the past 2 months. I can tell it's not just my sinuses, it's mostly my neck, it's fucked, absolutely fucked and I don't know how it happened exactly. I can't even rotate it 360 without unbearable pain. I need to see a chiropractor ASAP. Or megadose magnesium or some shit. Today was the worst pain I've been in for awhile, but I got a temperpedic pillow so hopefully that helps... honestly debated on a half gram of shrooms to see if it chills me out some, but it's probably not worth it. I was saving these for a trip to Cape Cod next week.

My black seed oil extract definitely helped, I was like staging killing myself earlier, constantly thinking about dying, but really that's been most of my year. Can't blame myself given the hell this year has been. Like this is pretty bad, and I know it's mostly from rebound effect of quitting both the Prozac and the TCA. I didn't consider the TCA could maybe cause brain zaps as well. I didn't realize it had a similar mechanism of action as SSRIs.

Thanks for the supportive messages either way. I do 100% want to live but man I need to see a professional therapist at some point. I respond so instantly negatively to a lot of things. The other night when I was feeling fine I was reading through old poems and found this from 6 years ago...

I'm petrified with stress
Can't move, can't catch my breath
My mind so blank, I cannot think
I'd thank the Lord for death

Terrible, really. I mean I kind of like the rhythm but... I've needed help for awhile haven't been dealing with it in the correct ways. A lot of my poetry from that period is pretty dark and demented. I was offered Diazepam back then too, I thought that was Xanax, and given I was still a pretty frequent drinker I said no, absolutely not. It's a good thing too because that could have been very problematic.

 

[BourbonMac]

I wanted to give an update. It seems the Prozac withdrawals weren't really the issue, it was quitting the TCA abruptly which was. I went back on it, for now, and would have to taper down as 25mg is a moderate dose, lots of people just take 10mg for migraine conditions. The zaps appear about the same time each night before I dose.

I've been taking a lot of Gabapentin lately, it doesn't really do anything that I can notice, but it must be helping withdrawals given I haven't felt any I could notice, though I suppose lately some days I was feeling more down than usual, or just this itching feeling that something is seriously wrong. Lots of things in my life are, but, Idk, it's a tough thing to try and describe. Like the feeling something very bad is going to happen. Problem is I used up so much of the Gabs that I'm almost out, and I'm not due for a re-fill right away. It's not better to replace benzos with another substance that can cause the same type of withdrawal, although apparently a lot of people quit Gabapentin without any so it's a tough call to make.

Either way I just messaged my doctor yesterday about the possibility of re-try a taper. He simply expected there would be no withdrawals and the same with Prozac which did have strong withdrawals for me at first. A lot of GPs don't understand that long half life doesn't mean no withdrawals. In fact it can mean the opposite, withdrawal for a longer period of time. I'd rather have a short intense withdrawal than a long and drawn out one, but it's hard to say. I'd take the long and drawn out compared to my experiences with Cymablta or Effexor where it was so bad I was unable to function at any level. I couldn't even walk let alone turn my head. People talk about brain zaps but I got entire body zaps where if I made any movement at all, it felt like I was being electrocuted. Prozac was mostly just the brain zaps.

So yeah, he's willing to put me back down to the 2mg tablets. I didn't tell him I was using Gabapentin in larger amounts in it's place, because that wouldn't really help anything. I'm prescribed 600mg a day but have been taking anywhere from 900-1200 on other days, and that's stepping into potential withdrawal territory. It's really shitty that he and many doctors don't think Valium has a withdrawal effect simply because of that idea where long half life = no withdrawal. But, he's just a GP. I've literally watched him google things for information about a certain drug. Nice guy but not very bright... But that's what you get when you have not the best health insurance.

 

[ChemicallyEnhanced]

Like really, is there anything I can take to prevent withdrawal? I'm scared. It's not been 48 hours yet and that's the half life, and I do have some kava capsules but I don't think that will get me through this, I don't even have that many. I just can't see how this isn't malpractice. And yeah, I have gabapentin as well, but that doesn't do anything to me because I've been taking it for almost 2 years at 600mg a day. I'm not trying to run my whole script out dealing with this shit. So frustrated

I don't understand how doctors in the US (I assume you're in the US) are allowed to do shit like that. What happened to "first do no harm"? And that's super-unethical. You're extremely unlikely to have any serious or dangerous effects (like seizures) but you'll also definitely be uncomfortable...anxiety, tremors etc :/
Can you see a different doctor? Or source your own valium and taper yourself off?

 

[BourbonMac]

Wow what the hell, I wrote such a long reply and then I tabbed out, came back and the page refreshed and deleted all of it.

I basically just said people who work in healthcare, especially in the states, tend to be vastly uneducated. I experienced this with an ENT lately, I had major sinus surgery in late May, but was given no indication the extent of the surgery until the day of. My pre-op didn't come until 2 days before surgery and also did not tell me what I was having done. I knew this: maxillary astronomy and polyps removal, but he worked on my ethmoid, frontal and sphenoid sinuses for no reason which have caused me great pain in these areas ever since. Pain I didn't have prior to surgery. But of course, to him, it can't be my sinuses. And when I ask him why I still sound so stuffed up, he just says "that's just how you sound to you." No brah, you didn't know me before this mess. Everyone I know knows I sound stuffed up. And your septoplasty sucked, my septum is still curved, I think it's worsening gradually and will have to be fixed all over again... Some friends suggested I lawyer up and maybe I should. I didn't give consent to the extra surgery, I didn't even have time. They just wheeled me out, gave me a sedative to calm me down, and drugged me to sleep. The lack of consent alone should be enough I'd think... They certainly didn't have me sign anything.

I'm not willing to get benzos off the streets. I felt bad about having to take them even prescribed. They were always a drug I never wanted to touch, but if I didn't, I'd be dead from malnutrition because my dumbass GP ordered me different antibiotics for months before ordering a single CT scan or sending me to an ENT. It messed up my G.I so bad, along with chronic stress and anxiety, that I basically couldn't eat, sometimes couldn't even drink water, without having acid reflux or chronic bloating and constipation. I'm still not 100% normal here but I'd say 85%. I stopped getting reflux forever ago, it seemed my diet or lack thereof was making it worse. I had a barium swallow and upper endoscopy and neither showed any signs of GERD or anything serious.

I just went along with it because I was desperate for my ears to stop ringing like someone was running a vaccum next to me. I could straight up be driving on the highway with music blasting and STILL hear it. If only I knew of the awful pain I'd be in by the end of the year... but it got so much better by last spring that I honestly regret the surgery, somewhat. I'm sure with time Flonase would've reduced the polyps a lot, I can't really say. According to 6 year old scans my sinuses were already messed up, and they held on to them, the same hospital, and didn't refer it to the ENT despite my septum becoming deviated from getting hit by a car.

 

[lolis my thesis]

Hi fellow neck pain sufferer and benzo taker.
Agreed; and good luck with the lack of valium. My doc wont switch me from clonazepam for a long taper, even though I requested valium for taper. "Studies have shown that is not necessary"

My primary doctor knows nothing about my condition. He says "I don't know how to treat your cervical instability". But lectures me to not be so negative(i.e. tell him what my symptoms are) and wants me to switch methadone to suboxone and taper me off of clonazepam; both of which I have been stable on for 20 years. He knows he can't treat my pain so he says I need to be positive and treats me for secondary anxiety and depression. Depression from being in intractable neck pain (spondylolisthesis); which I have had to diagnose myself as my surgeries have never addressed pain; or other weird symptoms which just cause them to shrug and say WTF; why you so weak man!

After a disc fusion; I started on methadone and clonazepam at a pain clinic. A recent x-ray shows movement of my C4 vertebrae 3mm; I have had two fusions, and C4 is on top of them. Surgeries never did much for my pain and other symptoms, supposedly from arthritis or disc bulges. having surgery scares me, but I have not been able to look up for 20 years; and doing so recently so caused a flare up but also turned a lightbulb on in my head. Its so frustrating; and anxiety from my pain doc going to retire and no-one else will sign off on my prescriptions. Opiates are being phased out for pain patients. I don't know for good or bad, but they always have allowed me to work and surf and function. But now I can't and have a constant headache and facial numbness and shoulders/quads burning; which was present 20 years ago but was dismissed. So I am advocating them correcting my cervical instability, surgically. I had lots of injections; and nerve burning, on my own dime as insurance wont pay for em. Go figure. did not help but did help diagnose a condition I didn't know existed until an x ray showed it last month. After 20 years of being dismissed but on pain meds.

If I say my neck cracks way too much; the doctors say its crepitus and don't investigate if indeed, my neck grinds more than it should. So I have to self advocate, play doctor google, or bear with idiopathic pain which they won't treat much longer. Never been on antidepressants and mood stabilizers before, but that's what my primary has decided I need; what I need is less pain, or to have my pain treated.
whew!

I am scared of getting lower on Clonazepam; after 20 years on 2mgs I am down to 1mg and starting to feel it; thanks to the know-little 39 year old doctor, who I really want to like but is glaringly ignorant. Im like spondylolisthesis, look it up please before you decide I need to get off my pain meds but he thinks the pain meds must be making me depressed.

Granted, I could be wrong; but its my life and I am committed to having the instablility corrected; costly injections and PT, chiro, osteapaths, acupunture have done nada or made it worse. I am not wrong that doctors think they know more than you do on any given subject and it isnt always true. It would help if they listened. I am learning to be more assertive.
Im Bojack, Horseman (or Mike)

 

[BourbonMac]

Really sorry to hear about your struggles as well, I hope you can manage to get off of it. You could always try out Gabapentin because it does help surprisingly well. I still haven't gotten the 2mg tablets yet, they're processing. I'm sure with your history of pain and anxiety though, you are probably already well aware of the GABAs.

That's not to say it's masked everything... I've had some fits of rage and feelings of alienation, like something bad is about to happen or is already happening, things are stressing me out more. But that's how things often were while still taking it, it just made those feelings less so. So much is situational, and this drug simply cannot help me get out of these situations. It can only help me cope until I figure something out, but given I pretty much only use it at night, and have resumed using cannabis (something I stopped using earlier this year because issues with my sinuses that eventually required surgery a few months ago made vaping or smoking cause bad headaches). A few weeks prior to surgery I went easy on it and was starting to feel nice again though, sometimes even forgot about the Valium.

It was very difficult and my anxiety actually got very bad, because I'd been smoking for 5 years every day, maybe missing 2 or 3 days before. Valium was like my "night time relax" drug, but that's how I used cannabis, even though it can give me anxiety lol... At least generally if I have to do anything functional during the day, it's not very enjoyable. Valium was similar only in that it made me feel really tired during the day or morning I'd take it.

 

[Valentine4]

Like really, is there anything I can take to prevent withdrawal? I'm scared. It's not been 48 hours yet and that's the half life, and I do have some kava capsules but I don't think that will get me through this, I don't even have that many. I just can't see how this isn't malpractice. And yeah, I have gabapentin as well, but that doesn't do anything to me because I've been taking it for almost 2 years at 600mg a day. I'm not trying to run my whole script out dealing with this shit. So frustrated

Unless you can find a connect, or get some darkweb chems fast, I pray for you - my only other thought is get some Phenibut, where legal; as it may help.

...though if you have Gabapentin that would be likely quite similar alleviation, unless you already have a massive tolerance to it (would likely create phenibut cross-tolerance IME).

 

[LucidSDreamr]

I've used valium at similar rates and time frames and not had problems quitting cold turkey for a few weeks or even a couple months....but I also kept doing methadone which makes things easier

Sleep will be difficult but I don't except anything crazy. I would ASAP find a psychiatrist and explain to him you are dependent on benzos, need them to function and tie it to your diagnosis strongly and what has happened

 

[Spinderella13]

Thank you. I know it will be some time before I feel withdrawal, probably. The gabapentin might help me out here the most. I suppose phenibut is also an option. I've never taken it, but there's plenty of good websites with it. Apparently it is pretty addicting and feels similar to benzos. If I feel I reach a point where I'm truly suffering then I might give it a try. At the moment gabapentin has been getting me by, and melatonin. Maybe the withdrawal won't be quite as bad as I think, it's really hard to say, I've never been through it before.

And LonelyDude, please leave me alone, lol... If I was a drug seeker I would turn to the streets, but I won't, and I would have made up excuses to raise my dose much higher. I admit having some addictive tendencies but you're going off what, the fact that I wanted to try MDMA once when there's no harmful interaction between a drug that I already quit? Like I'd said I'm a fast metabolizer. And even if I was a regular one, it will be out of my system. Let's talk celexa just for reference. It has a 36 hour half life, but 99% of it is out of your system in 7 days. Ami has a 24 hour half life. It will have been minimum 6 days since my last dose of Ami.

You're generally just being rude at this point.

this might be something you won't want to try just because you are maybe trying to get off of benzos but a good synthetic benzo that you can order legally in the United States is FLUBROMAZOLAM and there's others similar to it depending on whether your preference is Xanax Klonopin or Valium I myself preferred ALPRAZOLAM (zanax). It's synthetic but it has very similar effects and it's actually pretty strong so you need to be careful but it's maybe an option since your doctor cut you off cold turkey if you wanted to maybe wean yourself off using the synthetic there's a bunch of information you can get about it if you just Google it on the internet and then there's a lot of good Distributors for it also I hope you're not offended by my answer I'm not trying to promote you staying on drugs or anything just I know how very hard it is to kick benzos cold turkey I use Xanax for probably three and a half years straight at about 9 10 mg a day and it was absolutely ruthless having to go cold turkey and it's also a lot more dangerous than people presume that's why I don't understand doctors cutting people off of benzos especially cold turkey because they know the risks and they still do it anyways it's total bullshit

 

[Spinderella13]

^Yes the batch matters with Mulungu. Like kratom. I believe what kratom is to opiates mulungu is to benzos. But batch matters and when I found a good batch I bought a lot. It takes a good handful simmered for a bit to work. But it is undeniable and we will hear more in the future about this.

so do you have to go on the dark web I'm curious or like is it legal to buy the MULUNGU BARK in the United States? Because I myself have struggled with benzos for years and years and I forget who mentioned it but it did take me probably 3 years of doing them and having to stop because of jails and prisons and stuff before I really noticed bad withdrawals but the last maybe 5 years I get horrible withdrawal from Xanax , actually the first maybe three four years I used I used Klonopin and I didn't really notice withdrawals I don't know if it was from it being Klonopin or just cuz it was in the beginning of my benzo addiction. Anyways basically I'm just curious about the bark because I've never really heard of it synthetic fences that you can buy on just regular internet in the United States like FLUBROMAZOLAM would be my first turn to but I'm serious about the bark

 

[Hex13]

At that dose and the short time you've been on it, youll just return to your anxiety.
Find a new doctor and get on a decent dose of klonopin. Valium is weak

 

[Hex13]

Definately no serious withdrawal at those doses and time.

 

[JackARoe]

so do you have to go on the dark web I'm curious or like is it legal to buy the MULUNGU BARK in the United States?
I'm serious about the bark

Yes it is legal. I have not had it in 10 years. I use to use it to come down from psychedelics before I found etizolam. But the bark has to come from a reputable herbal shop. Once I found a good source (long gone) I use to buy it buy the pounds. A handful simmered for 20 minutes felt like 5-10 mgs of valium to me. Much more than say valerian root. Valerian is strong too, but it makes me depressed the next day. Mulungu was a quick relaxing tea. But I also had some from vendors that did nothing. I would start a dialog with a vendor and ask. I really do think we will hear more about it in time, Forget flubromazelam. lol Sounds like a bad hole.


I remember this thread. I hope Mac is doing well.

 

[BourbonMac]

I was put back on it after being hospitalized for basically admitting I was suicidal to my audiologist 2 months ago. I didn't seem to have much of a withdrawal, but I take Gabapentin which likely is why, and also dabbled in valerian root and passion flower extract. I wouldn't want to go on a different benzo, Valium is weak but I'd rather take the one that's easier to come off. At the moment, I won't be coming off of it any time soon given the state of things.

A new doctor isn't an easy option with my current insurance. I'm sure he'd be willing to try me on klonopin, but it sounds more addictive to me. I really don't wanna be on the stuff at all but the benefits outweigh the risks for me right now.

 

[Keif' Richards]

I'm not going to lecture you OP, but I'm in the camp of believers that Benzodiazepines are short-term therapy except in statistically rare situations.

Please believe me when I say that this is not meant to be condescending or rude or anything like that. I just want you to hear my opinion. It's an opinion, yes, but it's an opinion formed from years of research and experience.

In your last post, I read "I'm not quitting anytime soon, given the current state of things" or something very similar. Basically, every person that I have ever known who takes Benzodiazepines would say the same thing. They would quit, but they can't because it's just too stressful. Meanwhile, the ups and downs of the Benzodiazepines reinforce this feeling of anxiety. I've yet to meet someone who says they don't regret chronic Benzodiazepine usage who is really being honest about their situation.

I'm not judging you or pretending like I know your whole story or all of the answers, but I am catching you at a good time, when you are in the very early stages of usage. Benzodiazepines are not a chronic treatment for anxiety. They never were. The piper will have to be paid at some point. It only gets more difficult with time.

Your experience is what I would expect given the time you've been on Diazepam (Valium) and the relatively low dosage that you're taking. If anyone were to ask me what to expect, I would say mild insomnia, maybe some temperature intolerance like sweating and some increased anxiety, but nothing that would leave you non-functional or in the nightmare-league of withdrawal that I'm sure you've heard of.

 

[Hex13]

I've been on a semi-large dose of benzodiazapines for 18 years. I don't regret it, though at this point I realize I will have to be on them the rest of my life - or return to chronic alcoholism. The problem explodes when your in a situation and are forced to stop them - jail, loss of doctor - or cut off by doctor, stolen/lost pill bottle, etc. It is a long lasting extreme withdrawal, the worst for me being the extreme Panic.
I don't mind being on Klonopin and temazepam the rest of my life along with the Soma, but I must admit after 18 years of alcoholism (recovering) combined with the benzo use, at 36 years old now - my short term memory is impaired and demensia if I survive that long is one worry I do have.
Its about Quality of life................
I think you should give another benzo a try. Klonopin has a long half life, and I prefer it to xanax, or anything else. They'll start you likely on a ridiculously low dose but work up as needed. I'm on 2 mg tid and Im doing good, I used to be on much more with the booze and other drugs.
If anxiety is your main issue I'd also recommend Paxil, though no other ssri.
Restoril/Temazepam Is a sedative hypnotic benzo for insomnia thats easy to get even if your prescribed another benzo.
You can take it in the day rather than at night if your like me benzo's wake me up rather that put me down.
If any advice is needed hit me up.
And why cant you find a new doctor?
I can help you out with advice on medical assistance/insurance/social services.
pm me if you want.
....Just be careful if you use alcohol because medicinally it is just like a benzo and to become a 24/7 drunk is not that hard and after a year of that the hangovers stop and the delirium tremens begin.
Research this shit on wikipedia

 

[Hex13]

BTW Lyrica kicks Gabapentin's ass.
If insurance doesnt cover it, GOOD RX , it will cost about 25 bux for the max dose 300mg tid.
Claim neuropathy from an injury. Easy as cake to get.