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My boyfriend can't get hard enough or stay hard most of the time

The reason he cannot stay hard is because he is used to porn and not a real woman..a porn addiction will make u unable to perform with a woman most of the time .especially one lasting 15 years

he sounds like a douche saying those things to u..he's just trying to blame u for his inability to stay hard..fuck him for not taking responsibility for his issues and putting you down in the process..150 pounds is not worthy of him acting like you are obese..a real man wants the woman he is with to feel beautiful not insecure about her weight.. I'm sorry he is acting like an asshole
 
Although I don't have any experience with this (I hate spectator sports and porn is a kind of spectator sport) I have read that porn addiction can do this as well. So this is another possibility to consider.
P.o.T.u.S said:
The reason he cannot stay hard is because he is used to porn and not a real woman..a porn addiction will make u unable to perform with a woman most of the time .especially one lasting 15 years

he sounds like a douche saying those things to u..he's just trying to blame u for his inability to stay hard..fuck him for not taking responsibility for his issues and putting you down in the process..150 pounds is not worthy of him acting like you are obese..a real man wants the woman he is with to feel beautiful not insecure about her weight.. I'm sorry he is acting like an asshole
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Thank you all. Yeah I read porn can do that as well. I'm unsure how it's going to turn out but if you wish I can keep you updated. Who knows, I will probably need more advice at some point I'm sure..
 
Obviously there could be medical reasons for his ED but if hes healthy and the body is alright my money is on the porn addiction conditioned his mind to be aroused by porn and not the real thing
 
What he said Rebecca is horrible. he could have used better terminology. I, like others do like our women fit - but I've meet/know some pretty damn sexy 150lb women about your height. After having a baby, you may never get a perfectly flat belly - be realistic. Not saying its impossible, but you do the BEST YOU CAN. And of course, BIG CONGRATS on losing 70lbs! I know a few women who have snaped back or work their way down to 110~130lbs depending on their height and age.

I'm not quite impressed with your guy. So continue to work out and watch your diet. Starving yourself is actually counter-productive. That causes your body to go into lock-down mode and store more fat, rather then use it. Get an app for your phone called LOSE IT! Its free. Put in your info, you goals and it'll give you your max calorie count. Still hit the gym, its about mind-set. Its just YOU.

Your goal is 135lbs at 8 lbs a month. That can be done in 60 days. Then change your next goal to 120lbs for the next 60~80 days. Then to 110bs in another 60 days.

Every 5lbs or so is noticeable. And remember, its also for your son. It shows him healthy living and habits. And a happier mommy.

PS: I really did go on a bike ride after my post. About to hit the gym within the hour.
 
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Together for 6 months and the fact he cannot get hard is YOUR fault? It is YOU who needs to physically change to please him?
Pack up your remaining self esteem and move on, sister.
 
Awe thank you, I will look for that app. Yeah he could of worded it differently but he didn't. And I'm damn sure going to do my best with this. :)
 
jammin83 said:
150 lbs aint a big woman. Fuck him if he needs you to lose weight for him to get a boner. Fuck him if he needs to feel like he is in a porn for him to get a boner. Girl, you need to get a little punk rock in you.

You sure he gave up the porn? Men lie about that stuff. He wasn't attracted to you sexually but he though you were beautiful...pffft. You should have slapped his ass for disrespecting you. Why the fuck is he with you if he wasn't sexually compatible with you? You guys just friends?


I'm sorry but I'm not sure this is something that's going to work. Lots of red flags in the few sentences you put forth. What he is really getting out of the relationship? You pay the bills or what? Why are you the one putting in the work to make this work?
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I agree with this. Not to sound blunt or mean but why do you want to be with him if he doesn't want you the way you are. And why does he want to be in a relationship with you if he can't accept you the way you are.

To me boyfriend girlfriend relationship should have a strong healthy sex component to it. Otherwise it's just a friendship.

I think losing weight would be an awesome goal for you to work towards but only for yourself. So that you feel healthy and attractive for yourself. Not for his dumb ass (sorry if that's offensive)

And personally I think anybody who doesn't want the whole package including an active sex life with you the way you are regardless of what weight you are is not worth your time

I say fuck him if he doesn't want to be intimate with you the way you are now. What is he gonna do when y'all get old and body parts start sagging and boobs and testicles are brushing the ground when you walk
 
We all get older and fatter.... part of life. But sometimes we can do better for ourselves. Not always, but always worth a shot.

IMO, work on your self... and be open to finding a better guy.

Hey, My weight has been the same for the past several months. I've dropped 2.5lbs in a week with 3 work outs and drinking almost NO soda drinks. I was in the grocery store today going down the cookie isle, Chips Ahoy mixed with Oreo creme... drool. I didn't get it. I've been doing pretty good at reducing my sweets. No donuts and other JUNK, and actually using that calorie Lose It! app. With a young child - eating with them effects how you eat as well, and since their GROWING - that same food adds pounds to our adult bodies.

I know it's making a difference if I am 2lbs+ lighter next week!

Oh, a friend of mine who is a mother of 2 at age 28, she is about 5-2" and was about 145lbs and lost 15lbs in a month with a change in her diet - which she had to do because of health reasons.
 
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Thank you all for the positive words about me, yeah not sure how this is going to go but wish me luck, I'm doing this for myself first :)
 
I don't mean to be offensive or mean or anything but... maybe you're just not attractive enough for him and you need to try and look better? No offense. Maybe wear more makeup, work out, spend time on your hair, lose weight, shave certain places, surgery... just suggestions. I don't mean to be an asshole, I just am one by nature.
 
But is that really the type of relationship that's going to be healthy. Being with a guy who doesn't think she's attractive enough that she has to alter herself. Shouldn't she be with someone who loves her for who she is already and gets physically excited for her the way she is.

And don't get me wrong I think it's an awesome idea for her to become more healthy and lose weight for herself and I wish her the best of luck with that.
 
suzieq70s said:
But is that really the type of relationship that's going to be healthy. Being with a guy who doesn't think she's attractive enough that she has to alter herself. Shouldn't she be with someone who loves her for who she is already and gets physically excited for her the way she is.

And don't get me wrong I think it's an awesome idea for her to become more healthy and lose weight for herself and I wish her the best of luck with that.
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I don't know. I don't really understand this whole love thing. I'm very vapid when it comes to relationships, and I only understand looks. So I guess I'm not the guy for advice. The whole relationship thing is too much work.
I just feel that if a girl has trouble getting a guy hard, then she should really consider whether or not she's truely pretty.
 
So I don't know how well this will be perceived but.....

We all know there are extremely attractive physically fit couples out there. And there are extremely unattractive overweight etc couples out there.

In both instances I'm sure there are women dealing with the same exact thing as the op is.

And in both instances there are strong healthy relationship.

And for the unattractive overweight etc couples the man has no problem being hard and standing at attention ready to fuck his unattractive wife girlfriend or whatever because there is chemistry and a connection that goes beyond the physical looks.

And it's just my opinion that she would be better off being just friends with this guy and finding someone else who gets hard and wants to fuck the shit out of her because he accepts her for exactly who she is
 
I've been in relationships before and had no issues sexually, I do keep myself well groomed and I am losing weight, I thought about surgery but I'm not sure I want that, I'm not that overweight anyway. There is guys that want me and to have sex with me but I love him...but thank you tho and thanks for your support as well Suzie.
 
Well, assuming that he isn't gay, maybe he legitimately has problems with erectile dysfunction? It might not be that he isn't attracted to you, but he simply has physical issues.
 
suzieq70s said:
But is that really the type of relationship that's going to be healthy. Being with a guy who doesn't think she's attractive enough that she has to alter herself. Shouldn't she be with someone who loves her for who she is already and gets physically excited for her the way she is?

And don't get me wrong I think it's an awesome idea for her to become more healthy and lose weight for herself and I wish her the best of luck with that.
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My thoughts exactly! Be healthy lose weight if you must but be with someone who appreciates you for who you are!
 
Are u fuckin kidding me!?!,!, fuck this dude!!!! What a piece of shit! That's just terrible Hun, what he said and the way he said it and, well, everything. You seem like a chill chick and if he's too fuckin cool for u then it's his loss!why the hell did he have u move 1300 miles if he felt this way? What a fuckin prick! Be happy with urself Hun, do what makes YOU happy. Someone will love u for u, I promise. It's too bad ur not near mass. or I'd invite you out for a nice steak ;). Don't let others perceptions guide your actions, do you sweetheart! That dudes a thoughtless bum and he probably just lost the best thing he's ever gonna have. Weather u think so or not that relationship has been damaged beyond repair. Call ur folks and head back to the city and I'm positive you'll find someone who will live you for you and isn't concerned with such a trivial thing as a washboard stomach... Dudes got me vexed for real, ughhhh. Fuck him and his wack friends... Good luck Hun, ur friend, cliffy :)
 
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