My 2 Year Anniversary....

chicken hoagie

chicken hoagie

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 1, 2014
Messages
356
This month marks something special for me. As we have seen so many of our best friends die over the years, with too many funerals to even think about..

This month marks my 2 year anniversary. My anniversary of recklessness, of addiction at its most powerful, misfortune of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. It is an anniversary of understanding my biggest flaws, of where I went wrong, and understanding why I chose such a path...a path that, like many of my friends, put an end to life's story.

But it reminds me of how blessed I truly am to still be here. Because this month marks the anniversary that I was shot in my back with a .357 S&W revolver. A parking lot of Dallas, TX at a hotel, seeing fire and guts come from my abdomen as I plank head-first to the ground. Two weeks prior to this, i attempted suicide by putting my car in a ditch and cornfield going 90mph. I fought 8 nurses because I thought I was being sexually assaulted, and ended up flatlining from kidney failure.

By all means, I shouldn't be here.
RIP to all of my best friends no longer here. You can rest easy knowing you will always be able to spectate me, because I am here to stay.

But I think photos can speak louder than words. 🙏











 
chicken hoagie said:
This month marks something special for me. As we have seen so many of our best friends die over the years, with too many funerals to even think about..

This month marks my 2 year anniversary. My anniversary of recklessness, of addiction at its most powerful, misfortune of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. It is an anniversary of understanding my biggest flaws, of where I went wrong, and understanding why I chose such a path...a path that, like many of my friends, put an end to life's story.

But it reminds me of how blessed I truly am to still be here. Because this month marks the anniversary that I was shot in my back with a .357 S&W revolver. A parking lot of Dallas, TX at a hotel, seeing fire and guts come from my abdomen as I plank head-first to the ground. Two weeks prior to this, i attempted suicide by putting my car in a ditch and cornfield going 90mph. I fought 8 nurses because I thought I was being sexually assaulted, and ended up flatlining from kidney failure.

By all means, I shouldn't be here.
RIP to all of my best friends no longer here. You can rest easy knowing you will always be able to spectate me, because I am here to stay.

But I think photos can speak louder than words. 🙏











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Congratulations man. That’s a deep
Journey. And your swoll asf now.
 
Blessings to all of you. Remember, God is within all of us, and we are capable of anything. We are capable of everything.



To those at their lowest and to those who want your story to end, reach out.

I am not a religious person, but i quote..

"God, give me stronger battles"


"Now thats what I'm talking about."
 
You are a gift from God!
He/She left you here because you have more work to do, with helping other people
You surely could be taking a dirt-nap
All is Well
 
I was wondering what that scar was about. I can relate alot to this story. Be the best you can be in honor of all you know that have fallen. Let their lives be lessons as to why you never go back.

Also glad to hear you’ve been using psychedelics in a positive way, it seems they can help keep us addictive types on track with healthy habits.

-GC
 
so you got addicted to steroids now lol no offense but its very obvious your juicing and very hard at that, congratulations in the recovery but is it really if your playing god with your hormones

That cant be healthy the amount of shit your running to look like that
 
Delmonte421 said:
so you got addicted to steroids now lol no offense but its very obvious your juicing and very hard at that, congratulations in the recovery but is it really if your playing god with your hormones

That cant be healthy the amount of shit your running to look like that
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Hi there 😇. I do in fact take testosterone injections now. (Started just a couple months before being shot) But, here are some photos of me before I went to prison (in the gray shirt) and 3 years later after i got out. I was out on parole twice, started using meth and lost all of my progress each and every time. The other photos I present here, is me 3 years ago when I got out from my last prison stint. I know us men are competitive and get jealous easily by nature, but these are all natural photos, good friend 😌. Tuna, instant coffee, oatmeal and peanut butter were my only steroids. I know, hard to believe. No one in prison understood either🤷🏽‍♂️

Oh, but if you would like to improve your health and mental wellbeing, I highly recommend testosterone replacement therapy. I know I might look old as dog shit, but im only 30.

Only pictures of me on gear are post-surgery. Pretty amazing that my colon split in half and I never required a shitbag isn't it?


Steroids saved my life - the doctor and nurses made no question of that. I battled a very nasty mold-blood infection and pissed steaming hot razor blades for a week.


And well...ya know...If I die, I would prefer to die how I want to. That means not getting shot by a gay meth head, and rather die with a slice of pizza in my mouth, so as my wise paps says.


Cheers 🥂
 
Oh and also, testosterone is the only thing Im "addicted" to. I have ran deca for a single month, i have ran anadrol and anavar for approximately 2 months, i ran subpar doses (2iu) of HGH for one single month, and that is all. Testosterone I run at 200-400mg maximum per week.


But, mind if I ask what your addiction is, kind bluelighter?

"God, give me stronger battles."


You just have to want it my man. Of 1,000 men, those who only saw me called me "the white boi with abs."

Not trying to brag at this point, but I put everything I had, every single day, and I literally dreamt about my next workout and meal plan for the next day, every single night. I was in seg isolation for 6 months at one point, doing 1,000 pushups every other day and 800 squats on the other days.

You can be a Sayian if you want to be. You just have to want it bad enough.
 
G_Chem said:
I was wondering what that scar was about. I can relate alot to this story. Be the best you can be in honor of all you know that have fallen. Let their lives be lessons as to why you never go back.

Also glad to hear you’ve been using psychedelics in a positive way, it seems they can help keep us addictive types on track with healthy habits.

-GC
Click to expand...
I have used DMT in the past. And I have been reborn before. But this past week was different. Two days ago, something happened. Its so funny how the Matrix works...we are simply an inception. As we learn, more questions arise. But I promise you, this experience was...this was the one. And I dont know if things are just meant to be, if they already are, or if they are ever-changing and forever unpredictable.

The universe, including all of us humans and the trajectories we take --- they are no different than the trajectories bubbles take when you crack open an ice cold soda🙂.


DMT connects all of us together; it shows that we truly are all one in the end..we all have different trajectories, but as they say, what is above as is below?


Cheers GC 🥂
 
chicken hoagie said:












Hi there 😇. I do in fact take testosterone injections now. (Started just a couple months before being shot) But, here are some photos of me before I went to prison (in the gray shirt) and 3 years later after i got out. I was out on parole twice, started using meth and lost all of my progress each and every time. The other photos I present here, is me 3 years ago when I got out from my last prison stint. I know us men are competitive and get jealous easily by nature, but these are all natural photos, good friend 😌. Tuna, instant coffee, oatmeal and peanut butter were my only steroids. I know, hard to believe. No one in prison understood either🤷🏽‍♂️

Oh, but if you would like to improve your health and mental wellbeing, I highly recommend testosterone replacement therapy. I know I might look old as dog shit, but im only 30.

Only pictures of me on gear are post-surgery. Pretty amazing that my colon split in half and I never required a shitbag isn't it?


Steroids saved my life - the doctor and nurses made no question of that. I battled a very nasty mold-blood infection and pissed steaming hot razor blades for a week.


And well...ya know...If I die, I would prefer to die how I want to. That means not getting shot by a gay meth head, and rather die with a slice of pizza in my mouth, so as my wise paps says.


Cheers 🥂
Click to expand...
Man it's cool that you're no longer doing hard drugs but on the other side you're starting to look like a cartoon. You look too buff in my opinion, you're alright at that point, even a bit too big for my likes. Lay off the T, otherwise you'll start looking weird. It's enough already, just my sincere opinion xd
 
Delmonte421 said:
thats WAY MORE then T he can say whatever he wants
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I know but he looks really good already, if he keeps doing more of that shit apart from the side effects from too much T. He's gonna lose a bit of his appeal :(
 
Delmonte421 said:
IF you haven't taken tren then where are u
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Yeah bud, i study pharmacology and I dont want brain damage unless im going for Gold in Mr Olympia. That is for IFBB professionals only. Truly I would take it if i ever manage to stay consistent enough to get to where I am ready to hit the stage, but I do in fact study pharmacology, exercise science, nutrition, physiology and a lot more..I was raised a blue collar, by the smartest man I know who was into MS-DOS when it first came out. I ended up passing the first half of the CCNA exam by highschool (i was the first highschooler in the WORLD to pass their HALF exam. Call me a liar, that is fine. I can prove it with simple knowledge of subnetting.) But I love organic chemistry and pharmacology and exercise science more than anything. I am an ex con because i am an EXTREME drug addict. You see I have been shot. It was for a reason. It was because I was around some seriously heavy weight dude. It was no game, but I love video games and decided to make it one, and paid for it.


But I am a fighter and I am a survivor and, clearly I am capable of doing whatever I put my mind to. I was ranked 32nd in the world in Call of duty online for kills out of 3+ million players..I broke the highschool squat record..

At the same time, I have done unspeakably stupid, and also terrible things. I am human. I know I am never going to be the BEST at anything truly, nor will I be the worst. But I am absolutely blessed in knowing by affirmation from others that overall I am a good soul, and a powerful soul if I want to be. And I also love to help others more than anything, because guess what...I was homeless for nearly 2 years after being shot. I slept under a rusty tractor plow next to an overpass bridge one night with meth heads camped out down the road...I have earned my dignity and pride. Finally, I am still using, yes. Small amounts of meth (talking approximately 50mg per day). I try my VERY HARDEST to stay balanced because Im a polydrug abuser. It is so hard when you view drugs as tools like potions in a video game...(if you have them, why not use them) is the addict attitude. But acknowledgement is the first step in solving any problem.

And sorry, DMT has me manic😇
 
thats why I posted the Dorian Yates and shit I figures you'd like it
contraptions on your sobriety... SERIOSULY if testosterone helps fucking take it and working out is a great outlet so keep it up
Go to the university of Illinois dude and apply they love stories of people like you and you can get loans felon or not I believe?
 
nznity said:
I know but he looks really good already, if he keeps doing more of that shit apart from the side effects from too much T. He's gonna lose a bit of his appeal :(
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I literally am only taking 200mg per week and have had to take many long breaks in between, and ALL of my pictures are completely natural where I have no scar. I had never taken testosterone or any steroid in my life up until literally about 2 months before I was shot, and I went through an actual clinic and got prescribed. I went from 125lbs before jail, to 210lbs my first year in prison. I fluctuated throughout the years and got more lean and buff as I kept working out despite heavy use of drugs.


You guys must be going through some tough times. Be blessed.
 
chicken hoagie said:
I literally am only taking 200mg per week and have had to take many long breaks in between, and ALL of my pictures are completely natural where I have no scar. I had never taken testosterone or any steroid in my life up until literally about 2 months before I was shot, and I went through an actual clinic and got prescribed. I went from 125lbs before jail, to 210lbs my first year in prison. I fluctuated throughout the years and got more lean and buff as I kept working out despite heavy use of drugs.


You guys must be going through some tough times. Be blessed.
Click to expand...
can I ask why you got shot and what happened? were you moving serious weight? your truly a blessed lucky person
 
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