Hi, I ended here searching what was worse, heroine withdrawal or methadone.
I've stopped heroine cold turkey as
@Runtoparadise said, it's not pleasant, you will be really sick, sweating like crazy, you will need to change your bed sheets many times a day for one week, muscle pain...hum, pain in all the body to say the truth.
No appetite, really poor appetite, you need to force yourself to eat, like a really really bad flu, you won't probably sleep the first 3-4 days, just having naps 1 or 2 hours, day after day it gets better, but you will be tied to your bedroom for some days.
But it goes away, after about 10 days, you begin to feel more comfortable, after 2 weeks, your depression will go away, it's the end, you are so proud of you.
I went into it again, a year later, and that time I got Subutex, but wasn't working good, but helped, finally the craving was too strong and took heroine again, so I got Methadone, 75mg, down to 60mg quite fast (2 months) then I was on 50 mg for a time.
I went to jail because of nothing, I did absolutely nothing, but yeah, life is not always fair.
When there, the first thing at the morning, you get waked up to go take your Methadone, so if you wanted a bit of extra sleep, it wasn't possible, and also, I woke my room mates to, so I wanted to quit really fast, even if the doctor in jail don't let you choose, I just refused to drink the entire bottle (50mg) and always let some in the bottle.
So the doctor put me on 45mg, because I asked, and again, didn't drank it all, so went to 40 mg, and again same thing, I refused to take it all, and asked to have less of it, even if the doctor didn't wanted me to go down so fast, after 2 weeks I went from 50mg to 30mg, the next week I was down to 20mg, the next week (so one month) I was on 15mg, I wasn't feeling too bad, you know, you feel so sad when you get locked in a fucking prison for nothing...with murderer, mad psychos, I went in another room, thankfully it was a really nice drug dealer, and we spent as much good time as it is possible (you are locked down 22h/24 if you have the "chance" to go out for 2 hours...so it's important to be with someone you can speak with, and laugh, smoking hash all day long, and yes, they give people so much medication (mainly benzos), just to keep us as calm as possible; so we were both completely fuck'ed day and night haha.
Now I think about it and don't worry any-more, but it's not a nice time, it's not a nice place to spend time...of course.
Almost everyone was smoking hash, and no one would say something, you can smoke in front of the chiefs, they don't have a fuck about that, if you stay calm and polite with them.
I had one last week to spend there, and I would be released, waiting for my judgment (still waiting).
So I spent 6 weeks there (but it seemed like 6 months : / ), and I was down to 10 mg Methadone, but to get out, I had to accept being watched by a psychiatrist and do exactly what he would tell me to do, like a guinea pig, (with urine tests...nice fucking system), and I had to go see so many different people to see if I'm OK, if I'm not dangerous, if I stay home (I just could leave to go to all these appointments, during 3 months, now it's over).
Just to say, when I went out, I was at 10 mg Methadone, I dropped my dosage fast, not in the best conditions.. so I could stop taking it pretty fast, but no, I had to take a treatment, 50 mg Methadone again (because it was the dosage I was on while getting into jail), + more benzos, + a good dose Quetiapine...(I had almost quit all these drugs, because at week 4, I got a letter saying I could be released if I go in a detox hospital, but I had to be cleen before that, and I really wanted to go out, as you can imagine, so at the end I was getting hash for my benzos and Quetiapine, I was trading it with someone who had just a low dose of Alprazolam (1 mg) haha he wasn't lucky, for half a gram hash I gave him 3 Quetiapine 200mg and 2 Lorazepam 2.5mg, sometimes I gave him an extra 2mg Alprazolam, so he was happy, and so was I, always having something to smoke, my room mate was doing the same, so yes, we where smoking a lot! The room was completely full of smoke all the time, that was the funny part of it.
Yes sad story, I'm still anxious because I know I will go to court, for nothing (too long to explain, and don't want to, it's not the topic of this thread).
So in 6 weeks I went from 50mg down to 10mg, without much withdrawal (maybe smoking was helping me, mostly for sleeping, and not going crazy).
Now that I'm out, (remember, they put me on 50mg again...haha really good idea-_-all these efforts for nothing), but now I'm on 25mg, and I sometimes take half of the pill (in jail it's in a liquid, so you can't trade it, but out it's in pills), and it's OK, so I never really had withdrawal on Methadone, so I don't get it when some friends tell me they can't stop Methadone.
At some point I had minor craving for heroine, but it went away, now I feel "fine".
Also I think LSD helped me to, when I got out of this fucking jail where everything was in ruin, they let people rot there like shit, I really needed to get that out of my mind, because I was getting paranoid (the police to break into my appartment again, to the point I rent a gun from a friend, just in case, I told myself "if they want me to go there again, they will pay first", yeah I was really not in a "good mood", but don't worry, I had the gun just a few days and I leave it, I don't even know if I would have shoot...I was getting better, but that shit had waking up my "soft madness" I had years before, but I had no more crazy idea, I was fine, almost like everyone, a "normal person"; they really destroyed a long time working on myself.
All good people, stay strong, and leave medications if you can, do your best, now I feel really better, I'm not drugged any-more, I have better memory, more energy, more motivation, I smile more, get more confident, talk to people more freely, but only down side, I have sometimes really bad insomnia..I think it's mostly related to my benzo reduction.
I wish people to realize how bad heroine brings you to be, you are just another person, your personality get somehow destoyed, because the only thing that matters is getting heroine, and you leave all your friends, and some leave you, because of fear.