MDMA is a drug of false promises

[tripnnface]

yall need to attend happy/uk hardcore parties. more love than any scene imo.
as much as i love the trippy hippie psy kids and metaphysical talks and such...still never found more energy & love than the hardcore scene. ^^ underground parties for sure have better vibes than a bigger gathering. look how SHIT so many US raves are now. from the attendee to the lineup. i also hate the new age "hippie" festie scene all over the us. so fucking boring. where is the fucking psytrance. i really dont give a fuck about pretending to be in tune and eat vegan food or listen to guitars. i want to eat drugs act however i want and dance like a madman. Europe is so far ahead..... sigh

edit; i can only speak about that love in the hardcore scene in the US. no kandi kids in the UK i think. i hear alot of chav/ bro type people ruin some of the parties. defo not the case in the US

 

[SpaceSquirrel]

A relationship built upon a decision, a clear-headed act of the will, one that is based on self-donation to the other person for the other person's good, is the relationship that will last...... And really is the only kind of relationship that is worthy of human beings. Plus, this is the only kind of relationship that will induce the more satisfying feelings.

Only if you're a matyr ... By all means care for your partner's good as well as your own, and don't run away at the first sign of problems, but on the long run the good feelings have to oughtweigh the "hard work" I put into a relationship. Despite that I feel like a very worthy human being.

 

[myr]

I'm so happy to live in a place where the people that attend events are great, loving people. Peace, love, unity and respect - it's just there. I experienced it on my first event, and it was such an eye opener. I had never heard the term before. It's not about the term, it's about what people do, how they act, how they treat each other.

Yesss, psychedelic raves and festivals! (Most of) the people there are genuinely caring for each other, living by PLUR every day even when not on MDMA (but acid :D). It's not a get-together to do drugs, but a gathering of all the tribes of the universe - however cheesy it may sound - to celebrate life and all the good things we get to experience in this body and beyond. We chill, meditate, converse a lot, practice yoga when we're not dancing like a madman. :D
Anyway, I can only echo what luxray and BlueBull said. I never felt so much different toward people on MDMA. I find them more trustworthy, easier to connect but I don't love them more than sober. But as some people get harsh comedowns after every roll, others have trouble with their emotions. That's the way it is.
Also I don't make friends on a rave. I make acquaintances. It takes a bit more to develop true friendship with someone than rolling a few times, imho

@squarerootof23: well said!

 

[FuckWithRaw]

You could say that but you have to realize your still the one in control while rolling. If you say something you didn't mean you had the choice to say it or not. Same goes for cheesy shit people say believe it or not it's up to you but drugs were consumed.

 

[daily_ungrind]

I've experienced something similar to what you described, but I wouldn't go as far as saying that MDMA is a drug of false promises (well at least MDMA itself does what it promises to do while you're on it). I just think that, if you're seriously interested in someone (and that person in you too), you'd have to take some time to meet up repeateadly outside of party/drugs scene. Just quiet, sober, no distractions time. It might not feel as magical as while rolling (it would be unrealistic to expect so), but give it some time. In terms of saying grandious truths about one's feelings while under influence, it's a very common thing so always take it with a grain of salt... But still, no reason to be overly cautious. I believe it's good to accept the fact that some things are simply impermanent and beautiful as such. Feelings/moods are volatile just like anything else, even without MDMA. It might be a sad thing at times, but I guess we have to learn to cope with that. I apologize in advance if I sound a bit like a heartless person.

 

[limonov]

I completely get what the OP is saying, in fact it's basically an eloquent explanation of why I don't really like MDMA or other 'empathogens'. People have always assumed that I don't like it because I'm a surly bastard- and there is probably an element of that- but it's mainly because for whatever reason I'm always acutely aware that all this 'intimacy' is chemically produced. I'm not saying that it's a lie, it's absolutely not, but there is something undeniably synthetic, shallow, fake about the whole MDMA experience.

I've always thought that the false-feeling of loving and being loved has far more similiarities to cocaine/methamphetamine in this regard...Just because you have this deeply profound experience doesn't mean that those feelings will be there when the drugs wear off in 10 hours time.

I'm one of the few people in my 'scene' who doesn't take MDXX and in all honesty I don't feel like they (i.e. my friends who have/do take MDXX together and have big deep and meaningfuls etc) have a greater level of intimacy or a deeper emotional connection...If anything I have avoided a bunch of very embarrassing/awkward encounters fuelled by the 'false promise' of MDXX.

The whole PLUR thing has always struck me as being incredibly shallow and superficial- My experience of it has always been 'PLUR until the MD/Money Runs Out'. Sure there are good intentions, but there are also a hell of a lot of people who use the whole PLUR thing as an excuse for being a moocher and generally self-absorbed asshole. Not to mention all those people on MD who talk to someone while high as fuck and then thinks that they're 'really close friends' when they sober up...

I know...I know...I know I'm a cynical asshole, but it seems like there is a flip-side to the whole MDXX scene that involves a lot of extremes of emotion as well as confusion and hurt feelings

 

[herbavore]

It seems to me that the effects of an empathogen are like any other experience that reveals to us the possibility of a life where the ego quiets and our connection with others becomes a source of extreme comfort. Like all revelations--whether through the raging hormones of newly falling in love or through meditation or spiritual practice or through the effects of a substance such as mdma-- we are well served to view it as a door that has been opened to show us what lies beyond. I do not believe that this changes anything necessarily and yet profound change can happen if you choose to use what you have been shown. By that I mean that you still have to work through the layers of ego after the brevity of such extreme opening is over. Again, I think this is true whether the feelings of love and oneness came from meditation, mdma or some other substance or experience (near death is another). This is exactly what integration means. If you take psychedelics but find that the positive effects only last as long as the drug is in your body, then it becomes no different from a person that drinks alcohol to feel good for a while. To be fair, I have met many "new-age" people who use spiritual practices in the same way--in other words they get absolutely nothing out of them because they are consumed rather than explored and integrated. There really are no short-cuts to being human. It takes intention and a whole life. And maybe a few more?

 

[One Thousand Words]

So... my relationship ended recently, and one of the revelations that came up was that a lot of what fueled the passion was my partner's MDMA use.

Let's not ignore that the other perimeter here is you guys breaking up. Just as drugs can loosen people's emotions and create what I like to call cuddle jabber, so too does the raw emotions that are released when a relationship breaks down. In the heat of the moment it is easy to renege on previous promises or feelings expressed, and if pushed it is no uncommon to refute these tender moments as something said because I was high on life and mind bending drugs.

Does mdma warp our emotions? Of course it does. I hate electronic music unless I'm on drugs. I have caught myself sitting in a car during a comedown thinking that the Backstreet Boys tune on the radio is one of the greatest love songs ever written. That rug you rolled around naked on a Saturday night just doesn't have the same awesome texture come Tuesday afternoon when even the Rays of the sun feel like pin pricks on your skin. Mdma can polish a turd sometimes, and although those feelings may be real and true, it only masks the problems that may also exist.

The first time I did mdma with my ex wife I remember the song that played as I held her face and told her she was the most beautiful woman in the world. Even now when I hear that song it takes me back to many good memories we shared together over 15 years. But it doesn't erase all the shit reasons why we broke up. I personally for the most part I truly believe the emotions that mdma bring to the surface as being pure. It may brighten the best parts while dulling the worse, but I don't see it as a facade. Holding onto fragments of good when a relationship as a whole is toxic is not the fault of the drug, nor the person who professes their love under the influence, then reneges in the cold light of day.

 

[LSDMDMA&AMP]

Ok mane dogs this is the lmz here.
anyway
mdma isnt a drug i ever took particularly serious. I think thats where you got it fucked up. To me at least, its a party drug, nothing more. I dont gain really anything from it anymore, and i really credit it with only me being cool with dancing sober, and my political leanings becoming more liberal.
i used to take it only at parties and just to make the music better ya dig?
In the future, i think ill pick it back up when i start going to parties again, but only in combination with amphetamine or methamphetamine. Not stimulating enough, regular pure md puts me to sleep.

 

[seeingthelight]

I personally underestimated mdma. I first took it when I was very young to get high at raves. I then took it 20 years later and it changed my life and that wasn't the intention when I took it. I took half while at a rave and I felt high and a little out of control which was always what I didn't like about it. Then I took half with a guy I barely knee which was a good move and also bad. We connected on a level I have never experienced before and though it was lovely at the time I didn't recognize it right then because I had never experienced that with anyone before. It really scaredme and he really showed up and got lost in it which I was totally shocked at because this is a guy with a lot of ego and reputation for being a cool dude.

I recognized something in him though that I think although he felt vulnerable he was happy he could be himself and not have to put up the facade. Things from his childhood that madevhim feel like he had to behave in that way and it was strange because I didn't know him but connected. Anyway he tried it on several times and Irefused bbecause I thought it wouldn't mean anything. Even though he had opened up to me I couldn't believe the connection I just thought it was me I didn't know it was the effect of the drug.

Anyway he seemed quite insistent and wanted me to look in his eyes, it's like he knew. We ended up kissing as he got so close I didn't want to refuse or reject him for him to think that I didn't like him, especially after he opened up so much and made himself so vulnerable which I actually loved.

I kissed him with passion I have never given to anyone in my life. I gave him all of me, everything! !! I didn't want him to forget me. I don't know where it came from but he felt it and we gazed into each others eyes with love so a while then he said softly "come on" and wanted me to have sex with him. I wanted to tear his clothes off but couldn't. It scared the shit out of me because I know for me it would have been a lot more than a one night stand. I wanted to make love to him but I didn't believe his feelings for me were true and was scared of the rejection if he were to regret it in the morning. So I rejected him saying it was because I was in a relationship, which he already knew and he was too. He said but you just kissed me passionately so the passionately definitely came across. He then asked if me not sleeping with him because I was in a relationship was the only reason . I said yes and he said "that's okay then" as if it was so important that I didn't reject him for any other, let say personal reason. I put this down to the fact that when he did openup to me briefly and awkwardly he said that his parents took him to another country and left him there.

Anyway, when I left the room I heard him saying to his friend he had tried a few times and I said no but he sounded so disheartened and I was very surprised that he was telling his friend this in this way or that it even bothered him.

I have learned a lot from this trip and even ended my relationship which I knew for a long time was not right for me but was happy to plod along because "he loved me". It may have been chemically induced and only real for the moment but the fact is that i felt a love that had never felt for anyone before and in hindsight it was beautiful! To be in love had never bothered me so much before, it was more important to be loved because of my own rejection issues by my father. I believe, and I hope i am not wrong, that he recognized it that night and he was expressing it in the only way he knew how. But I couldn't because I have never experienced that love between me and another man so had nothing to compare it to. Or I knew it was real for me but was scared that it wasn't for him and would then reject me next day, which is the reason why I have never fully opened up my heart to someone and it was always more important to feel wanted and accepted.

In any event, I hope we both took something from the experience. I am generally a deep thinker so may have just over thought the whole experience and am being too emotional. But I feel like I get him and which may sound stupid as I didn't know him before, just knew of him, though he always intrigued me for some reason though he always seemed to be intimidated by me - weird

So I guess what im saying is fake or nott. He may not give a shit about me now but there is always something to learn about yourself from the experience, in the rjght setting vif you want to. I do feel it is hardervto accept though if you weren't looking to learn something from the experience but you do. It can be life changing and you try and dismiss it because you can't believe this change can happen from a drug. I can't even speak to my friends who also take drugs about it because I don't believe they have had such insight. Don't underestimate mdma

 

[Sir Ron Pib]

I don' think I would call MDMA a drug of false promises but your have to realise it can create false expectation. Mood outlook expectation are all fluid things which change. MDMA creates a profound state which is delightful and if used sensible can fascilitate honest exchange, see where one can be free of certain restrains, trauma and so on. But it isn't a magic happy ever after pill; it can be a useful glimpse or time of reflection or therapeutic but it isn't an end point - all that requires work. I can see it could prop up a relationship - in fact in therapy it was often used to negotiate a split with less baggage. It teaches us without certain bounds we can relate better even to strangers - that's interesting and one can learn from that - in normal life one can be open but you still need to protect yourself since not everyone has your inetrests at heart and people are linked by a lot more than the feeling in the moment; interests, social structure etc.
Maybe people have experienced really liking someone at work yet weirdly if they leave and you don't have the same structure, complaints, joys moans as in the work place your interests don't quite match.
I suppose many things offer false promise if we don't look at a wider context. Drugs can offer great promise and help to motivate better states of being but they aren't a magic button - the worlds complex and it takes much work; guess it like most utopian ideas break up at some point.

 

[DRUGZNOTHUGZ]

MDMA... it made me do some stupid shit a while back that gave me a bit of a mental breakdown, though when I say "made me" that's pretty subjective to my personal perceptions of what was happening at the time also... basically my friend whom I don't think very highly of has a missus, and while we were out one night he got gakked as fuck and spent the whole night looking for some K and ignoring her. I saw her adjusting her tits excessively, thought she was doing it to catch my attention after she came over afterwards and started talking to me, from there on never stopped talking to her or paying her attention. I swear I took a whole lot of hints on the drive home afterwards that she was into me, just from things that she said, however when I asked her about it the next day she had no idea what I was talking about. I got the impression that she might have been playing me to make her boyfriend/ my "friend" jealous, after explaining what happened that night to my counsellor she thinks it's a possibility too, regardless my friendship with both of them is now over as a result of what happened. My whole vibe that night after I received that signal was solely focused on the fact I thought she wanted me, there was no doubt or second-thinking in my mind that could contest what I thought we had going. I've never thought that way while not on MDMA, while there's a lot of other factors that probably contributed to my thought process that night, I honestly think the empathy and false feeling of intimacy we tend to get while on googs contributed to my actions that night.
That said, normally I don't hang with people I don't find relatable even when I'm rolling.