Treatment Mania and brain damage - also commonality of ppl not able to see they are manic

[Madness]

@Juicewrldfan Yeah man, I agree.

It's hard because I'm always tempted with low hanging fruit, or frustrated with the status quo, or annoyed at a coworker, or misunderstanding my girlfriend, or driving wrecklessly, or day dreaming toxic thoughts - which causes me to drink.

So, I don't know, I'm sort of struggling with my current situation. And how I just don't find it fulfilling

 

[Juicewrldfan]

@Juicewrldfan Yeah man, I agree.

It's hard because I'm always tempted with low hanging fruit, or frustrated with the status quo, or annoyed at a coworker, or misunderstanding my girlfriend, or driving wrecklessly, or day dreaming toxic thoughts - which causes me to drink.

So, I don't know, I'm sort of struggling with my current situation. And how I just don't find it fulfilling

Man, I feel that. It resonates a lot with me. I get bored and unfulfilled easily or used to a few weeks back.

It’s been slipping back to that some but not the majority of my time now. I feel like that’s highly related to depression or vice versa. Maybe it’s causing the depression in my “mixed state” maybe it’s not a true mixed state I’m in but just I injured my knee so can’t do much right now that was bringing me fulfillment like work and exercise and cleaning.

My wife is stuck with that right now and I feel bad but I was doing it all pretty much before I was injured. I feel unfulfilled in my relationship most of the time but not sure if I’m willing to throw in the towel on it yet.

Just she is lazy, and eats herself into gain in ng alot of weight and then cries about gaining the wait when I would remind her to exercise and how we are working on nutrition in a kind way and not often but still annoys me. But I guess what annoys me more intense mindedness always complaining and crying about every little thing. I mean now when she gets in and out of the chair she moans and groans like really? Stop it.

It’s your fault you ate yourself into that and now you want my sympathy after trying to help you and you did nothing to improve you situation. That’s what I hate about it. She doesn’t even try. Well I got her to do 2 minutes of 5 lb barbels I bought for her.

It’s just I’m trying to progress not backslide and that mentality is contagious when I’m around it so much so I have to keep my guard up.

And if my job isn’t challenging or rewarding then I get like that too; unfulfilling. That’s why I do leadership. Always challenging and rewarding because people are complex and get to help them and the team. Usually if you help one person even you help the team.

I try to set goals every day that bring me closer to my big goals write them down and then I plan how to execute them for that day. That alone will bring fulfillment for me but I exercise to first thing in the morning. Sets my day up for success and discipline. The more I exercise discipline the more I exercise my will the more powerful it becomes.

I know probably sounds a little manic but idk…

 

[Madness]

@Juicewrldfan I love that about you, the leadership part - I too enjoy bringing our peoples best. Creating synergy. I haven't had the opportunity yet to lead professionally because I've learned that I hate office work and it's hard to pretend I am motivated by things that don't matter in the grand scheme of life. Which is why I'm searching for non profit work.

Anyway, my girlfriend is going through something similar, and at least for us .. is the emotional aspect man. There's just sometimes a disconnect. Huge misunderstandings that I am not sure will every be truly worked out.

 

[Juicewrldfan]

@Juicewrldfan I love that about you, the leadership part - I too enjoy bringing our peoples best. Creating synergy. I haven't had the opportunity yet to lead professionally because I've learned that I hate office work and it's hard to pretend I am motivated by things that don't matter in the grand scheme of life. Which is why I'm searching for non profit work.

Anyway, my girlfriend is going through something similar, and at least for us .. is the emotional aspect man. There's just sometimes a disconnect. Huge misunderstandings that I am not sure will every be truly worked out.

Yeah that’s how it is with us. And she does have MDD so I mean she’s recovering from that but you have to do stuff to recover just laying around eating and complaining doesn’t help and it drives me nuts that I have three diagnosis ( I don’t think the 4th is that accurate)

And I’m working my butt off to get better. I just expect a little effort. And she likes playing a victim. Got friends and family thinking I abuse her because she plays that game. So upsetting

 

[endlessnameless]

I've had quite a lot of experiences with hypomanic states, especially after getting clean and those natural endorphins start flooding the brain. At least I was told by my doctor at the time it was hypomania.
It's certainly manageable. It does come with a few following 'flat' days, like the past few days. They weren't nice.

 

[Pissed_and_messed]

I found it is not particularly manageable by anything but strong psychiatric medications like quetiapine once it turns into full-blown mania. It was really dangerous.

 

[Juicewrldfan]

I found it is not particularly manageable by anything but strong psychiatric medications like quetiapine once it turns into full-blown mania. It was really dangerous.

Yeah I ain’t going to lie had I not heard you all say I sounded manic( without me telling anyone they were trying to tell me I have BD) I may not have listened to my therapist and tried the meds although at that point she was “strongly encouraging “ me to take my
Meds which really means she would send me to the hospital had I not but I mean in her defense I was thinking about killing my wives best friend ALOT. And my neighbors for blasting their base all hours and then telling me that “oh we will just play it when we aren’t sleeping” like wtf is that….um no.’guess I’m still a little pissed. Oh I am thinking about it again. God dam it.

Anyway, so yeah I’m glad and the meds are helping but I still have to use skills.

I see a new psychiatrist tonight so we will see.