@ OP
I see ya spend a good bit of time here... I did the same when I started becoming "tame" and it provided me with plenty of distractions.
It was reading/typing content which obviously led to delaying my drug use and if it started for 2 minutes went to 5min, then 20min, then 30min then almost a whole year a few tears ago.
I still use (occasionally) but looking back feeling "broken" has nothing to do with my drug use but more to do with what life throws at us all.
Just wanted to convey that BL (once one becomes familiar with its many halls) can be very beneficial in a distracting and (depending on what is sought) healing a wounded soul.
Peace