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junkies are the new lepers, the diseased you get to feel righteous about persecuting

Rehab is a horrifying joke. At least the ones I experienced. Not to knock anyone who used it to get clean of whatever, I mean, it's a tool if you want to use it, you just have to do it yourself.

And I want to be clear it's not just opiates. Old AA drunks are obnoxious in their own special way, and I believe enjoy a sense of being "special" in that they live in their ridiculous chronic "disease" that follows them everywhere like a little badge.

Okay, so I can stay up late and show a little contempt for these groups, not all of it fair. I'm saying the person who just injects unauthorized medicine into his veins is not the target of society's contempt. The one who slinks around and steals your shit is the one society dumps on. And those folks like to commiserate about it.

In turn, the junkies might feel a little justified stealing shit from an asshole, and a spiral of contempt starts swirling a little faster.

How about, no subculture is an island?
And I think maybe going into your recovery with the mindset of a subculture you identify with, will effect your chances of success. Just something to consider.
 
junkies are the new lepers, redux

today i suffered a nasty couple of scalp wounds, actually from a fight. it was resolved. i rubbed lidocaine on them and washed and realized i needed stitches. to the local er. firstly, i walked in the front entrance, blood dripping down my face, passed three people before coming to the er receptionist who asked me, how are you? i raised my eyebrows and stared. she repeated and i point at my bloody face. only then did she she i was bleeding

the real problem wasn't the wound but my blood sugar - stress dumps sugar into your blood and my meter at home would only say HI. i told them all this. they stuck my finger, flapped their hands and sent me for a ct. was of money, i didn't even have a headache. then they wanted urine, i thought to test for blood. back in the room, nursie is running away with my piss and dr wants to staple my head. i'm, not without a fucking shot. oh, we can give you meds until we read your ct. i thought to ask, what's the urine specimen for? nurse answers, for urinanlysis. i fix her with the INTJ death stare and say, okay, from now on, you don't be glib with me and i don't rip you a new one for it, now, what's the specimen for? nurse, oh, we have to run a drug panel to determine if that's why you fell. i'm livid, first off all, you can't determine that from a piss test, you need blood. second, i didn't authorize that and i won't. you don't get to treat people who use drugs like lepers. if you seriously think i threw myself down the stairs to get drugs, the right thing to do is to FUCKING GIVR THEM TO ME. but i didn't. i'm leaving now.

an orderly runs in a few minutes later and shows me some papers - sir, could you sign these so if you get in an accident when you leave the hospital can't be sued?. me, is this a special hospital for idiots? how would it benefit me to do that? she ran away.

i went to a better hospital and told them first thing = i have nerve pain in my feet and i smoke pot for it, so no urine. i'm tired of my people being hunted like dogs. they just laughed at me.
 
So, why did you think your post deserves its own thread?? Because it doesn't. Please just post in the existing thread instead of making a new one whenever possible. Thank you.

Merging posts.
 
Scro....I don't think most of society (especially nurses who see the worst ppl usially) think that a non scumbag stealing drug user exists. Some even think everyone that smoke MJ are normally bankrupt ppl that probably steal to get thier MJ fix.

I volunteered in am ER way back and it definitely nwasmt the function ing addicts with money that were in there with cuffs on every night. Combine that with societal and religious bias and egerydrug user is a dirtbags.... Unless of course your an old well dressed white lady taking Xanax and vodka....that seems to get a pass
 
Really I kind of ruined my explanation by starting off all coy with it and then maybe probably one bowl too many.

OK: I have a firm belief that with things like addiction and especially "recovery", expectations, culture and language are bigger forces than most people realize. By segregating yourselves into "junkie" status, you inadvertently adopt some of the stereotypes, even if subconsciously.

For instance, someone in "recovery", such that they're never "recovered," is more at risk of relapse, because there's never resolution.

Likewise, I think if a person views herself as a junkie, her chances of sobriety go down.


OK, that big thing (I've got stuff written elsewhere) got mixed with my general dislike for opiate addicts. And that's mainly because they're cliquish, as though the rest of us, even sober single guys who get denied pain meds the exact same way they do, don't also suffer society's judgement. In other words, the whole premise here is wrong. If you're all lepers, then what are the rest of us?

OK, but this thread was about opiate addicts and society looking down on you, specifically. I honestly didn't mean to derail it.


ETA: and yeah, my mother can go to her GP and get all the benzos she wants; srsly she says "I'm gonna be on an airplane" and Xanax. Me? Lucky to get a beta blocker.
 
^Héy! Whén I was in rehab (both times) I was the only opiate user in my group, and (in the other groups) there were only a very limited few other opioid users there both times as well (both times 1 for weak stuff like tramadol & valtran & benzos and a few for heroin, also some who used it sporadically but had issues with for instance cocaine).

Anyway, they were the last ppl I wanted to associate with. I was trying to get clean, and eventhough the 2nd time I wasn't trying at all, I was still forced to detox. No way that I could deal being around other opiate addicts during that period. Also, both times the (other) heroin users (save for 1 guy) were the stereotypical thieving scumbag-types. Each of them chose a methadone taper (not me, I wanted it to be doable within 3 months). And the ppl who were coming off their relatively weak meds, were the biggest whiners ever (I guess that was because they used prescription meds as prescribed? So they'd never had to deal with the detox before)?

In any case, I had gone through wd's so many times before that. So I never even really brought it up, except I told every new arrival in our group that they shouldn't be surprised when they noticed that after any tiny effort or any hot meal, I'd sweat buckets. I get this symptom during both benzo & opi w/d, so it was pretty bad (I litterally had to keep an entire roll of paper tissues right next to me during every meal, usually I'd use the whole roll during a single meal). Telling people beforehand made things less awkward, my social anxiety already caused plenty of awkwardness for me. Them being addicts too made it less embarassing to tell it to them.


That was the only time I spoke about any of my detox symptoms though. Talking about it only made me focus on it more. Which was the last thing I wanted. So I avoided the whining folks who were in a (to me, but I know how subjective it is) minor w/d from some light opiates + a small dose of benzos. At that time I just couldn't deal with their whining. I knew they probably weren't used to any kind of withdrawal, but my god. I was detoxing pretty hard but I never complained. Only when I was asked by a nurse (privately) I'd say I wasn't feeling too great (which was a big understatement) but I knew there was nothing they could (or would) do anyway so I just sucked it up. The 1st time was the worst, because the benzo paws lasted near 5 months.

And the other heavy opiate users there were stereotypes whom I wouldn't trust with 5€. One of them stole the TV from his room when he left, for example. Lol. What I noticed and struck me as funny was, that it seems like there's a taboo around opiate use even amongst drug users here in Belgium (even in frikkin rehab.. lol). There was also a lot of ignorance regarding opis, pretty much all of the other folks thought heroin could *only* be injected for one. Anyway, I was never lumped in with those really scummy H addicts thankfully, other people treated me well and trusted me with their money if they needed something from the store, or a burger if that's where I was going. Rightfully so, I prefer being dopesick over stealing.

Anyway, in Belgium opiate addicts don't form cliques (in rehab), or I just went there when there weren't many of them. But if they were anything like the opiate addicts I did meet there, I'd never want to be part of something like that. I made friends with all kinds of ppl, alcoholics, cokeheads, speedfreaks, benzobastards.. It just depended on who they were, not what drugs they were there for. I also do not associate with any opiate users in 'real life'. I'm not saying I would never, but they'd have to be a pretty cool person.
 
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