I am of mixed heritage. My father is French Canadian and my mother is Puerto Rican. In November 1996 i started dating this Native American guy. He was full blooded Ojibwe from Minnesota. He was 3 years older than me In March 1997 my dad found out my boyfriend was Native American. He immediately became outraged and upset at me. He told me that i had to stop dating my boyfriend . That i was embarassing myself and my family with my actions. He said my boyfriend wouldn't be able to do anything for me.
My mother asked if she could see a picture of the guy I am dating.
Now, I'm not saying I was... anxious to show a picture of the guy I was dating, but I had a nervous smile the entire time.
The fake smile as she said "Oooooooooh! He seems nice!" made me sick to my stomach. Regardless of how much I already liked him and the great things I said about him, no, all I got out of my mom was warnings. "You know, you gotta be careful! They might just wanna date you because they wanna use you for money!"
"Are you fucking kidding me? He's a fucking person and I'm very fond of him and I'm going to date him and, hopefully, continue to date him because I like him very much. I don't give a fuck what you think about him or what bullshit racist reasons you give me for not dating him, I am -not- concerned about whatever fake bullshit you spew telling me that it's not supposed to happen." I even accused my father of racism, but he just said "How can i be racist? I married a Puerto Rican woman."
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I didn't listen and continue to date him for about 6 more months. But my mom and dad had stop talking to each other. Me and my dad had stop talking to each other all because of this. So finally in September 1997 i gave in and broke up with him in since i didn't want to break my family apart. .
Maybe it was for the best. This guy my Native American boyfriend was kinda violent with other people. He was physically violent towards white people. He kinda hated white people.He was just angry at white people. He didn't like when people called him “chief". He always said that white people are living on the land that they stole while forcing them to live on reservations that are some of the worst land in the country. He always said that Columbus was a terrible human being and the fact that he is still celebrated should offend anyone living in the United States. He said that Columbus was an imperialist, racist invader who began the conquest of a people and a land. He was not so lucky to have good parents. His mother was abusive, his father was in prison, he grew up very poor.
I mean I’m barely scratching the surface here but based on how he grew up, you’d expect him to be the worst kind of person.
But we had a damn near perfect relationship. Never argued, were always excited to be with each other. He considered me part Native American, because of my Puerto Rican heritage. He always said that Puerto Ricans are Tainos. Often people would make fun of him, use racial slurs towards him, so he fought and beat white guys up at times. After we broke up, in January 1998 he beat up a guy to a pulp, so he spent 6 months in county jail. I felt responsible for that. February 1999 in Cleveland Ohio he was arrested for burglary. He was convicted. He spent 3 years in prison. He got out in February 2002. About 3 years ago i have got in touch with him. We had a conversation on FB. He lives on Leech Lake Indian Reservation, Minnesota. He is married with Native American woman. They have 4 kids, 3 boys,1 girl. He seemed happy.
It bothered me for such a long time. I blamed my father for racism. But is my father a racist, or he just wanted to protect me? Maybe he wanted to save me from making a bad decision. My dad absolutely hated my Native American boyfriend. He always wanted more for me (and probably a white guy - my husband is white).
