It could be a bit of both, Comrade and possibly a communication issue. I'm not trying to hijack your thread Libby but I thought of this thread yesterday when having a conversation with my ex-boyfriend.
When we were a couple, this man would invite me over and it was meant to be just overnight. I would get ready to go home and he would say, "No, don't leave yet or don't you want to watch this movie with me?" There was even a few times he took my keys so I could not leave without saying goodbye while he was asleep.
The reason I'm bringing this up is when we spoke over the phone yesterday he made this remark about how I used to overstay my visit sometimes. But I can say confidently the only times he was dying to get rid of me was when he owed me money. He used to borrow my car on the premise of a job that he conveniently would not get paid for. In the process, use up every bit of gas in the tank to where the add fuel light went on.
This happened more times than I can remember. Finally I had to be assertive and ask him if he was giving me the cash promised or not. It would end with me storming out angry as hell. I guess my point is, he perceived it as overstaying my welcome. The truth is I was being taken advantage of and could only see it in hindsight.
I had to delete half this post as it's turning into blog material. When he made that comment I could feel my blood begin to boil, especially since right after this he was asking me for a ride to another so-called job. Truly a fuckoffskies moment but not brave enough to actually convey this. I'm slowly learning that I need to be able to say no firmly with no room for misinterpretation.
Until I master this technique for today, I'm silencing the phone. Thanks for reading my rant.